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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think baking for school is a waste of women's time?

194 replies

SayThisOnlyOnce · 02/07/2015 10:06

Not a taat but I have seen various posters mentioning 'and I've got to bake for the school fair/sale' amongst many other things they need to do.

If you LIKE baking, fine.

But most people seem to find it a chore. I have never baked for school and I don't intend that I ever will. I've never encountered a dad stressed out because he has been guilted into agreeing to bake something he doesn't really have time for.

IME the cakes are sold really cheaply anyway. If you costed the time and ingredients I'm sure its making a loss, ie it would be cheaper not to bake and just stick money in a bucket.

It just seems to be another form of everyday sexism.

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 02/07/2015 10:07

It just seems to be another form of everyday sexism.

Seriously???

haveabreakhaveakitkat · 02/07/2015 10:08

I just pick up a pack of cakes from the shop

nulgirl · 02/07/2015 10:09

Trying to balance the sexism, I do agree that it is a waste of my time and I am crap at it so I get dh to do it instead. He is much better at it than me

FarFromAnyRoad · 02/07/2015 10:09

Ridiculous.

I baked loads for school. I'm an excellent maker of cakes and mine were never sold at a loss - and were always the first gone.

Explain the sexism thing please - if you can - because I'm not getting it at all

ToysRLuv · 02/07/2015 10:10

I sort of get this, but I don't feel guilty about not baking. Maybe that makes me a man.

MrsMcColl · 02/07/2015 10:12

I like baking (when I have time), but have never baked for school. It's never fitted in for me time-wise.

Totally agree that many women seem to tie themselves in unnecessary knots over this non-issue, and men do not. Like you, I'd rather just bung a tenner to the school once a term and not have to engage with cake sales at all. (I may have said that out loud in a cake queue once. A space opened up around me...)

YouMakeMyDreams · 02/07/2015 10:12

I don't know there is a dad at our school that makes the most melt in your mouth shortbread ever. He may get stressed I don't know. In fact we have a fee dads that are most certainly the bakers for our school fayre.

DansonslaCapucine · 02/07/2015 10:12

I have never even thought about baking for the dc's school. But then, I sometimes don't buy their teachers an end of year gift.

ToysRLuv · 02/07/2015 10:12

It is a waste of everyone's time. All that kids want, anyway, is a pile of coloured butter cream with sprinkles and sweets, so could just sell that out of a bucket at 25 p a dollop..

RooftopCat · 02/07/2015 10:13

You are right it is generally the mums doing the baking.
But it doesn't really matter if they are sold below cost. It's a 'double donation'. The baker donates the cost of the ingredients, energy and time. The buyer then donates on top of that. But the baker generally donates the most.
It's only pointless if the baker reclaims the cost from the PTA or whoever - then it could be a loss.

Original poster

SayThisOnlyOnce · 02/07/2015 10:14

The sexism thing - at both schools my DC have been to, its been expected that Mums Will Bake. Its what mums do. No one ever asks a dad to bake anything.

OP posts:

TiggieBoo · 02/07/2015 10:16

I've never baked, never will bake and never felt guilty about it either. I don't see why anyone would feel like they've got to bake, if you want to donate and can't be bothered baking just buy some cake from the shop.

Original poster

SayThisOnlyOnce · 02/07/2015 10:16

LOL at MrsMcColl. Have to say, I'm glad I'm not the only non guilty non baker.

OP posts:

WorktoLive · 02/07/2015 10:18

They allow men to bake too don't they?

I agree that the economics don't always stack up, but from my point of view, I like baking and always have baking stuff in my cupboard, which usually come from Aldi, so are quite cheap, so to me it wouldn't actually feel like I was spending any money and just donating my time.

If you have the time and inclination, do some baking, if you don't, do something else. It's not actually compulsory to bake for the school fair is it?

The main problem is that people see a six pack of Mr Kiplings in the supermarket for a quid or whatever so don't want to pay more than a few pence for a far superior home made bun/piece of flapjack/slice of cake.

Mrsjayy · 02/07/2015 10:18

The husband used to help dds bake for school things if it was my turn 7 used to go to the supermarket and buy un iced fairy cakes and ice them

UptoapointLordCopper · 02/07/2015 10:19

I love baking but never bake for school. When I bake things I like to EAT THEM ALL MYSELF.

I buy stuff from the corner shop the morning of the cake sale. You have to get there early because the queue is round the block.

BertrandRussell · 02/07/2015 10:19

Our primary school was in a very socially disadvantaged area. A lot of families could run to buying a couple of cakes every fortnight, but certain,y couldn't have spared a tenner.

We always offered to pay for ingredients- and always made a profit. There were some people who didn't want to bake for whatever reason, but bunged us the occasional tenner for ingredients - that worked well.

sparkysparkysparky · 02/07/2015 10:20

My dh bakes for relaxation. Never bakes for school because, like me, he'd prefer to let Mr Kipling or supermarket equivalent take the strain.

Oliversmumsarmy · 02/07/2015 10:21

I baked once for the school. My "offering" was bought by the HT. I was never asked to bake again.????

MrsMcColl · 02/07/2015 10:21

Now I want cake. I blame WorktoLive, with her talk of buns and flapjacks. Elevenses...

haveabreakhaveakitkat · 02/07/2015 10:21

When buying from a cake stall I try to steer dc's towards the shop bought, wrapped up cakes and away from the home made by kids variety.. that probably contain a more than acceptable amount of saliva

Artandco · 02/07/2015 10:21

School always asks for stuff here. Both dh or I bake depending on who is more free at the time. It's not an issue. They just ask for Cake, the don't care who made it

AnnPerkins · 02/07/2015 10:22

I have never felt guilty about not baking.

They've stopped doing bake sales at DS's school because loads of kids aren't sent in with any money, they get given a cake anyway so they're not left out, nobody gains anything and the PTA and the bakers wonder why they bothered.

BertrandRussell · 02/07/2015 10:22

So it's not a waste of time- but it is something that only women seem to do. But in my life generally, I know loads of men that cook, but I don't know any that bake, apart from bread.

Fizrim · 02/07/2015 10:24

I've been the one selling the cakes a lot of the time, and we do get some shop-bought ones. IME, the home-made ones sell faster and the shop-bought ones are often left over (we donate to the staff room when this happens!).

Some people are fantastic at decorating the cakes - I know someone who buys plain cakes and decorates them - and the decorating is the fun bit for my daughter. I am happy to bake cakes at home but on the one occasion that I couldn't (stuck in hospital!) DH bought plain cakes and DD decorated them - job done to everyone's satisfaction!

And I am always happy to have an excuse to buy and eat cake

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