To put dd 7m into nursery so I can go to the gym?

[Vijac]

I've just started putting her in for an hour two times a week. The first sessions were ok but today at her 4th session her face just crumpled when I said goodbye which wrenched my heart :(. She obviously realised I was leaving her. Am I mean putting her in just so I can go the gym. I just want to get fit and lose some weight finally. Will I damage her according to attachment parenting? Thanks.

keeptothewhiteline
If everybody else copied your example and worked at home, where would you get food and water and heat and light and medicine and books and clothes and all the other things that the rest of us go out to create ?

It's called a conversation cherryblossom - if it's too robust for you then the door is right there -->

What do you do talkinpeace?

If everybody else copied your example and worked at home, where would you get food and water and heat and light and medicine and books and clothes and all the other things that the rest of us go out to create ?

THat is a silly argument. We need people doing all sorts of things to make a society, not just those people who "create".

We have travel agents, cleaners, zoo keepers, childminders ( who also work from home) IT consultants, hairdressers, librarians.
None of these people are "creating" stuff either.

I also work for a food manufacturer remember.

God what a crock of shit.

Put the baby in nursery. She will be fine. Why does everyone take everything so seriously! It's the last 25 years that everything Is so child focussed. Before that since time immemorial babies have just jimmed along with the rest of the family.

keep - I think the point being made was that there are thousands and thousands of women doing jobs in society that provide a service to others in some way, who is going to do all those jobs if they are expected to work from home?

As had been said, what about the female teachers who taught your children? Do you view them with such disdain because they didn't put their own children first by deciding to change to a job they can do from home?

You can run a library from home? Do they let you live in the library?

I want to live in a library!!

As for the zoo

It would be great if a Zoo Keeper could work from home. I quite fancy the idea of zebras and monkeys frolicking in back gardens

So its OK for someone to be a childminder and work from home, but its not OK for someone to use the childminder. I don't understand... please explain how this would work.

I don't much logic is being applied ReallyTired.

@ reallytired

I think keep's approach only works in a world where everyone doesn't do the same as her, which makes the 'you could be just like me if only you were motivated to be so' message a tad ironic.

But what model would work if we all did the same thing?
If we all made cheese in a cheese factory? It would be a strange world.

I agree- not much logic.

realllytired Of course it is fine for people to use childminders- I just prefer not to.

You just don't think much of the women who do use childminders because the mom obviously hasn't chosen to work from home?

I'm with cherryblossoms, it has become a bit of a bunfight and it's a shame.

OP, if you're still not sure, maybe make a list of the positives and the negatives that you've had in this thread and decide from there.

Something someone said a while back also made a lot of sense; their first child went to a gym creche (I think that was it, it was a while ago now) and cried but then settled well. The second never did, cried and cried and cried the -entire- time so she waited until the second was older. It just wasn't time for the second one to be away from her mum yet. She was fine a while later on.

Can you find out if your little one settles after 5 mins? If she does, then it honestly seems okay. if she is crying the entire time, then maybe wait a few months.

Slightly off topic (sorry!) but why does working at home mean children don't require childcare? I work at home and although it is very convenient now that my children are teenagers, there was no way I could have concentrated on the job when they were at home when they were younger.

I think keep said that she did her work early in the morning before her children were awake and again at night after they'd gone to sleep. I assume some was done at the weekend too when their dad was available to entertain them. From reading her posts I don't think she did any work in their waking hours when she was the only parent there.

I doubt that much can be done before they are awake or after they go to sleep.

My thoughts exactly marynary.

Yes I'm wondering how someone can work 30 hours work as well as looking after their children full-time and manage to do both things properly.

I wouldn't worry too much about going off-topic marynary, that ship sailed some time ago!

I imagine you could work 6 hours a day 5 days a week if you did 3h in the morning and 3h in the evening - no idea when you'd wash/cook/clean though, unless the children are obliging enough to let you do those things in the intervening period. It also doesn't seem to leave much time for anything else in your life (cue 'my children are all I need'-themed music)......

IMO a lot of the judgement comes from mums who deep down are a bit jealous of mums who can afford the time/cost/luxury of being part of a gym that also offers a crèche. Suspect some are probably a bit out of shape and jealous OP is actually doing something to get fit and feel good

I put on loads of weight when pregnant and at 3 months, put DS into my gyms fab, offsted rated, ever popular crèche. Smiling, lovely, happy mums and babies/kids would arrive and depart and so popular you need to book a week in advance. 1st session I felt a bit odd leaving him to walk erm… a few metres away across the gym floor, but moment I had Katy Perry on the iPod and the feet on the treadmill for the first time in ages, I had to stop crying of happiness. 1 hour. For me. To get my figure back. To relax. To look hugely forwards to collecting and (always beaming/happy) DS and then go home feeling energised. 1 year later (I have my figure back!) & he still goes a few times a week. The girls there know all his habits likes/dislikes and he adores them. As we drive into car park, he starts clapping and squealing with delight. He gets to play with other kids, gets a huge amount of space to explore (more than at home)and fab selection of toys, all while being cuddled and fussed over by warm, familiar people. There is NOTHING at all WRONG with this in ANY way at all.