To be angry at DH and not accept his apology

[Theonlylooninthevillage]

Tbh his apology was crap and I'm still upset hours later.

My dd who is 3 is going through a shouting, not listening, being a normal 3 yr old stage.

This morning she was on form saying no etc etc she opened the drawer that has all the arts and crafts saying she wanted to color. We were just getting ready to go to school so I say no.

She opened the drawer anyway and then my DH comes up behind her takes her hands off the drawer and shuts it, now usually I wouldnt say anything but he did it with too much force and she bounced back, bounced off his belly and then hit her face on the chest of drawers.

DH then says "well that was silly, next time don't strop and you won't get hurt". I saw the whole saga and it was because he took her arms off too hard she bounced and then bounced forward iyswim.

I was right next to her so grabbed her in for a cuddle and explained that it wasn't her fault she bounced and she had a little red mark on her face. Now considering she wears glasses full time I'm surprised she didn't have more of a mark or worse.

DH walks off and sits down and says she was stropping that's why she hit her face at this point I was upset he wasn't saying sorry to dd. he refused to say sorry to dd so I consoled her and said it was an accident and she's ok, she is ok.

Dd then comes over picks her up and says "sorry, ok" puts her down and then says "happy?". I explained I wasn't happy and I'm not happy it wAsnt dds fault and I said to not touch her with force like that again.

He went to work and we did a half hearted love you have a nice day but I'm still upset, I told my sister and she thinks iabu because dd is going through a stroppy phase and is being a madam at times, but I said that's no excuse to basically be mean to her and take his frustration on her being a 3 yr old out on her.

Sorry for the rant and essay. Wibu?

Thanks purple, marked my place

The long and the short of it is it served her right. If she hadn't have been misbehaving, it never would have happened, so perhaps she'll learn her lesson and not misbehave next time. She misbehaves because you are so soft on her. Simple. Consoling her over a stumble, for god's sake.

Mrsc I thought you were going? I wasn't ask YOUR age :/

I'm really really apologising in advance, and I've tried to avoid this, I really have. OP, this is just a request, absolutely not a criticism. Please would you mind writing "should have" and "shouldn't have" instead of "should of" and "shouldn't of"?

apedant very naught correcting someone's grammar on mn tsk tsk but I will oblige.

Btw, I think you need to re evaluate this situation and when you realise how badly you handled it, to give your DH. Huge and sincere apology.
Your DD fell because she would not do as she was told. You are blaming your DH for something that was not his fault and making him a scapegoat. What lesson are you teaching your DD here? She's learnt that she can do what she wants because if Daddy steps in to thwart her then Mummy doesn't like it and Daddy is the bad guy. This is not constructive parenting and it's not conducive to working as a team in bringing your child up.

Fizzle fizzle fizzle poof

yoursfan yeah most wife beaters say that to their wives after they have just knocked them out. "It's was your fault you know..."

Honestly theonly I think we are on a parallel universe here!

Just drink

tequila I think so too, I'm just waiting up for dh watch me be called controlling for that and playing with my cat. sounds good but it's a bit late.

"That's what happens when you don't do as you are told." Would have been the reaction to that little incident by both the parents in this house!

So Tequila, you are comparing an accident involving a child to a deliberate act of violence towards a woman? Comparing the husband in this case to a wife beater? What a well reasoned argument you have there.

Parallel universe indeed.

Fireside the thread is caput, done, fizzled out. Your taking tequilas post out of context. Clutching at straws.

The thread is not caput, far less done, fizzled out or even over - not until posters decide not post on it any more.

You can't dictate when the "end point" is: it is not up to you to decide that.

Yes, it must be very embarrassing when multiple people post to say YWBU, but you were behaving just as badly as your DD.

I'm far from embarrassed, why would I be embarrassed?

I stand by my opinion, end of.

Why post this thread if you think you're right then?

if you can't see why your behaviour was embarrassing, then that is up to you.

However, trying to act like a thread monitor by telling people the discussion is over is not OK. And comes across that you are so embarrassed by the way you behaved that you cannot countenance anyone else telling you that YWBU.

For validation, Wayne?
Her DSis and DH who actually know OP as well as a whole host of posters who can only go by the facts as posted have all said she is BU.
Which is pretty embarrassing.

soldier your right I'm very embarrassed I think I'll hide somewhere and lick my wounds?

Whatever you fancy, as long as it's not dictating who can post on this thread.

Blimey. This thread is a right one, isn't it?
Hides back under duvet. I find people scarey

soldier you are banned from posting on this thread :)

Am I banned?

You can stay Wayne :)

Camel, there's no grudge, I have moved on.