Is this MIL's finest hour?

[namechangeorimfucked]

I've had to name change because my family members know my name on here and if they knew what she was doing all hell would break loose..

MIL is currently on her way to the hospital to visit a relative (her niece). Niece has just this morning welcomed her first baby after a very traumatic labour that has lasted days. A failed induction and many hours later, she has had an EMCS and both are apparently doing well. MIL knows about all this because her SIL has been giving her updates as she receives them from her DD and her partner. She has relayed said details to me and DH.

MIL gets on ok with her SIL but does not like her niece, she has been very judgmental all through her pg, both behind her back and to her face. As a result of this, niece and MIL fell out at a family gathering about 3 months ago.

MIL received a message from her SIL saying that the baby is here but they do not want visitors til visiting time tonight. Despite being told this, MIL is going to the hospital to see the baby... Her SIL is not even attempting to go yet and its her GC.

Niece lives in another county, MIL is on her way there now, NHS staff badge around her neck, to pop in and see the baby. She accused the niece and of being 'silly' and once she gets there she will be happy to have a visitor. She also said that she has to go now because she is busy later in the week and 'can't be expected to wait for them'

The Niece's DP is on facebook now letting everyone know things are ok. Do me and DH tell him she is coming?

We explained to her that she will not be let in if they don't want to see her and she said she 'knows her way around' and is 'practically staff'. She is expecting to see the baby before her own SIL...this is going to cause a shitstorm so big it will consume us all.

Gibble
Seriously I would make a formal complaint and get her sacked - that's a complete breach of confidentiality .

"Flip me, this is gonna be an epic update."

Let's hope so

As you said though, it's odd that your nieces mum kept updating her.

Not really. Those not in the daily war of dealing with someone like this forget just how bad they are. Even a slight break in contact gives them a moment to talk themselves into thinking 's/he's not so bad' and drop the defenses. And being in the position the SIL was in, with big news, sometimes gives you the mistaken notion that you are in control of this situation, it's obviously SIL grandchild, obviously she will work with her daughter's needs and obviously no one will stomp all over that. In the excitement and stress, you remember too late that MIL will somehow insert herself and make a scene and you should have kept her in the dark.

F

I hope it's epic and not just "mil said 'oh well, never mind' and left"

Anyone else wondering how many children are having burnt tea tonight .

Subtle place marking there Cher. :o

I haven't even started cooking our tea! Kids are running feral in the garden! Come on OP! Please update!

Burnt - stuff that

It is possible to track who logged in to whose records and when.

I would hope it's not just possible, but unavoidable !!!!!!!!!

Does this woman have NO awareness?

Mine won't be having any tea if we don't hear soon.

MIL's SIL was probably very worried and happy to talk to someone who superficially seemed to care.

She's probably feeling very upset and guilty right now.

What is it with some people and newborns? My mum has a friend who was at the hospital within 20 minutes of her dil giving birth. And she was very adament that as the grandmother she had "rights" and would be demanding to be let in regardless of what time of day or night it was. What I can never understand in these situations is why people continue to tell these people things.

Give them a packet of crisps, they will be fine.

Urgh she sounds a nightmare. Hope she got turned away.

I'd take a loan out and go private if I were you op! She's utterly bonkers.
Although I would be tempted to invite her SIL to meet baby first just for shits and giggles.

Place marking. I'm taking the DC out for dinner so I can sit and discreetly check for updates. Preferably somewhere with a playarea!

DH was on the phone with her for 40 mins... she rang from her mobile to DH's mobile. She was still sitting in her car in the hospital car park...parked in a staff member bay.

She is NOT HAPPY at all. SIL was waiting for her at hospital reception. She was annoyed about this because SIL had apparently 'lied' to her as she told her that niece did not want visitors.

MIL said she was 'just passing' the hospital so decided to drop in, she told my DH that she had said she had a meeting there that day...she doesn't.

MIL then told her SIL to show her where to go and she was in a hurry and had to get back to work. SIL told her that the niece was getting herself sorted out, and then they were all going to have a sleep, and she couldn't see them. MIL apparently refused to leave, she said to SIL that they should go to the hospital cafe for a coffee together. So they did- SIL was very firm and told her she wasn't seeing the niece because she is recovering. They argued, MIL said niece was being silly and she needs to get her act together.

MIL and her SIL then sat in the cafe for ages, SIL finally persuaded her to leave. Without seeing, DN, her partner, or the baby.

On the phone to DH, MIL started telling him how nasty they are, that her niece 'showed her up'. She said that they have chosen a 'stupid name' and that she will not be calling the baby by her first name but by her middle name (and she told SIL that). She also told SIL how daft and precious Niece is being not having visitors, because apparently in her day 'you had to be dressed and ready for people coming to see you'.

She then let loose a tirade of abuse and accusations to DH as to why he got involved and told them she was coming (this was the screeching I heard). She said that by poking our noses in, we made her look stupid at the hospital and we had 'blown things out of proportion'. DH shouted her down, telling her she is deranged and controlling and the whole family thinks it. She started crying, saying that DH and me will be trying to keep our child away from her. He confronted her about chasing up my call to the antenatal ward (at my request) and she shouted that something could have been wrong with her grandchild and that I wasn't telling her, so she had to go behind my back for the sake of her GC.

She said she would be coming round to our house tonight to discuss our views on her role as a GM, with her DH, so we can all say what we 'expect'.

DH said we are busy and would ring her tomorrow.

We are both exhausted and in shock tbh. She makes it sound like everyone is against her for no reason. When DH brought up the argument she had nice her niece, she blamed the niece and said it was 'pathetic if she was still dragging that on'.

Any update?

Am I getting confuddled then?

there's OP (pregnant with 1st grandchild) and DH working from home, who is the son of
Narc MIL
MIL's SIL who is the mother of
Neice (new mum), whose new baby is being guarded by DP?

Who does this vile bitch actually think she is??

NC is looking like an amazing option right now.

very very narcissistic, run away.

Oops cross post. Your mil is deranged!