Cashier... Am l being unreasonable?

[Feminine]

This isn't the first time he has done it.
So, l shouldn't have returned to his till - but l thought he wouldn't do it again.
This particular chap enjoys hiding an item, if he knows the child is waiting/wanting it.
Today it was a packet of nasty frozen themed cup cakes....
As soon as he has scanned them, he hid them under his keypad.
My daughter is six and she was wanting to take them straight away.
For what must have been at least two minutes, he claimed they had disappeared!
Dd was confused and kept checking the conveyor belt, the basket... The belt.
I kept thinking "oh he will give them back in a moment" he made her wait an eternity...
Poor girl was going to cry....
I know l could have said something, but l wanted to also be kind to him.
It went on forever.
Him laughing ... And me looking confused with a weak smile on my face.
Plus, he has done it before. With some sweets of hers.
It was also quite apparent that dd was upset.
I'm not going to report him, l just wondered if anyone else finds this odd.
I know he is doing it to be 'funny' but l think he has (again) over done it.

"Ugh, report him. Nobody wants god damn jokes at the till with their food, never mind with their kids. He's a complete idiot. "

That is possibly the saddest thing I've seen in a long time. I think you'll find that very many people's days are brightened by a few words at the till.

OP, maybe you just stop buying your DD so much junk

I wanted to see if others would be annoyed/offended.
I would've been very irritated by this, but my face would have made my feelings very clear.

Even with your remonstrating - I can't see why you would just stand by and let this muppet do that. Esp when you knew he had done it before. Saying something, in jest or in anger but standing there gritting your teeth - no. YABU.

Oh okay.
I'm out.
After 5 years here. This is the thread that has finally tipped the balance for me.
What a nasty bunch of dissatisfied women you sound.
Criticism of the situation, and of me, l can handle. I've even ignored the personal attacks on my husband and daughter.
Picking holes in how l post, which is how l speak (obviously) is just plain nasty.
You can all piss off. l'm done. and l'm hurt.

Feminine you can't flounce after 5 years because of an AIBU thread about supermarket shenanigans.

The OP is getting such a rough ride here. She acted the way I would have - she could see the man thought it was a joke and didn't want to offend him! Just because she didn't jump down his throat doesn't mean that she part of a pathetic pair!

I am outraged at some of the vitriol that has been spat here - I hope the OP has hidden this thread. In case she hasn't - YANBU in your actions.

OP. You should hear yourself speak.

You said: "For a while you smile through gritted teeth"

But then, today you claim you didn't grin, but had a gritted-teeth business-like expression.

Ao which is it, a smile or a solemn face?

You also repeatedly told us all:

Just thought l'd give him a second chance l suppose

You should also stop using your daughter a a social experiment. Don't keep giving someone a "second chance" out of the supposed kindness of your heart. Who ARE you trying to kid? That's as stupid as allowing a child to play with a dog that has already bitten. You just don't. You choose to protect them from upset instead.

This guy has previously taken her sweets and done the same silly routine.

Just bewilderment that his stage show had moved on a notch!

You say that the cashier has done exactly the same thing before, and then you say that he's moved it up a notch. Well make your mind up, was it the same or was it not?

You then say that This was a while back, she wasn't particularly upset then (if at all) she was much younger /not so aware.

So OP, you need to decide what your story is.

Either he did it before and you gritted your teeth at him but decided to give him a second chance, or he has never done this before because last time you smiled at him and she was totally cool with it but since then he's moved it up a notch.

Either way, its the parent that's the problem here, not the cashier.

TBF, OP you've picked fault, fairly unpleasantly with everyone who hasn't agreed with you. I think you set the tone of the thread.

What a nasty bunch of dissatisfied women you sound

You should stay OP, in between calling Lying spiteful and the checkout guy spoilt, your insight into your own behaviour means you fit right in.

I don't accept your righteous indignation OP.

You were quick to call someone "spiteful" and criticise another person "overly invested."

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

If you post in AIBU, you need to expect some people might actually answer a resounding YES!

No need t feel hurt, just take it or leave it. But I would say, if you feel hurt then imagine how that poor man could feel if you report him to his boss? He has opened himself to you and told you a lot about his life. From what you say sounds like he thought he had a good banter with you, and even went the extra mile to play a game with your daughter.

If nothing else, please take from this thread that it would be wise not to return to his till, or if you do, do him the courtesy of being honest with him!

l know sparkling But l'm crying. I'm really hurt.
Canvassing opinions is one thing.
Criticism of my posting style is really cruel.
There is nothing l can do about that.
For that reason, l'm leaving.
I have been totally honest throughout.
Reiterating as l go, as my words were being twisted.

My rational mind says, don't flounce after five years. My heart says give up.

Thank you though.

OP, everyone gets a hard time on AIBU, just ignore the personal attacks. I do think YABU but I think that your anger at your dd being upset is perhaps making that difficult for you to see.

Your use of space and ellipsis is like reading a poem though, OP. Are you posting from a phone?

No need to give up though. General consensus is that you are being unreasonable. There have been plenty of suggestions about how to handle the situation in future without being confrontational like me.

Ah op, just hide the thread and name change. I'd have thought most if not all have had to do that at one point or another, I had to after one of my first threads.

I'm not getting into the debate, it doesn't matter what I think, it's horrible when it leaves you feeling like crap.

Hide and move on and in time you'll forget all about it.

OP I'm not surprised you're upset. A skim read through this thread and I am taken aback how many people on it have managed to find an angle in this which lends itself to insulting you.

Of course you are not pathetic, cruel, weak and a doormat. I wonder what's wrong on here in that sometimes posters can interpret such an innocuous situation as an opportunity to be spiteful.

I guess some folks just love the superfluous drama.

Ins and outs of Cupcake Trauma aside, the OP has given as good as she got on the majority of her posts back at the people she disagrees with on this thread, so I'm not getting why the need for the sad face.

As most people have already said. You allowed someone to tease your child to the point that she was about to cry.

You should have told him to give the cakes to your daughter - she is very young and needs parental support not you both standing back smiling/gurning/gritting teeth/not making a scene etc. Whichever you did, it was hard to tell with your evolving story. If you knew the cakes were under the keypad why didn't you just say?

Did you read the thread on chat about childhood hurts and injustices that still rankle? If not, maybe you should.

Sometimes being a parent you have to take charge and you know, be an adult?

Yes, pumpkin l'm posting from my temperamental phone.
It is easier to type in short bursts (I've found)
I did hesitate in posting this, as l'm very familiar with this section.
To begin with, posters were fair - maybe not agreeing with me, that is obviously okay.
One poster started the character assassination... And then the venom spewed forth.
I can't pretend that doesn't hurt. I can't stand being misunderstood.
Thank you for the latest replies.

I've read all of the OP's posts and only see her standing up for herself in the face of some bloody sanctimonious and uncalled-for insulting posts.

I'd be really irritated by this, and you should just prompt him to give the item back, and let you pay and get on with your day! Such a waste of time!

You're very good at playing the victim OP. You've been very keen to post about how you are all about fairness and being kind and how awful people have been to you.

You're the one considering reporting a guy for playing a stupid trick, whilst you and your DH stood by and said absolutely nothing to indicate that you thought he was wrong. You're the one calling people spiteful, spolit and offering slow hand claps, followed by passive agressive smiley faces. You've got back what you have dished out. That's generally how AIBU works, but then you would know that after 5 years, wouldn't you?

This thread is .

For me the issue here is that the second it became apparent that OPs DD didn't realise it was a joke, and began running back to the basket etc, the cashier should have gave up on his stupid prank. But it sounds very much to me like he knew she wouldn't get it and he wanted the distress and confusion.

It is not a customers job to bring a cashier into line, or to manage their behaviour. The OP should never have been put in the position where she was expected to defend her DD in the first place. It should have been a simple transaction, but was made utterly unpleasant by an employee of the company, and my guess is that the company would want to know about it so they could prevent any more unpleasant experiences.