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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

to contact the police about my neighbor?

241 replies

leanne45 · 03/06/2015 14:59

Basically we had a massive party last weekend ,admittedly it went on later than we'd planned and carried on a bit on sunday ,but it's not like it's everyweekend, it's maybe twice a year at most.

So on monday, my husband was leaving for work and the next door neighbour confronted him about the noise. hubby just told him he needs to get a life and walked past him,because to be honest it's our house and again it's not like it's every weekend.

As he tried to walk past ,the neighbour grabbed him by the throat and basically said anymore noise and he would hurt us. He then saw me later ,came out and called me 'subhuman' and swore at me and went back in the house .Another neighbour he was out in his garden saw this, but said nothing.

Iam not comfortable living here now, and I want to call the police,because Iam worried what he might do.My hubby just says it could make things worse. He doesn't work,or doesn't seem to ,according to some people round here he has mental problems and he goes to the gym everyday, to be honest they way he acted and looks like he is on steriods. Could the police search his house and get him out of there that way? he rents.

OP posts:
Aermingers · 03/06/2015 18:33

I think the same person has a different thread going right now....

Maryz · 03/06/2015 18:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FenellaFellorick · 03/06/2015 18:37

I think perhaps if your husband hadn't said "get a life" in response to a not unreasonable complaint about a near 24 hour party, the neighbour may not have blown his top.

I don't condone violence, but "sorry" would probably have been better than "get a life"

that was so aggressive and dismissive of him. Perhaps it is not a bad thing that he encountered a bigger bully.

Aermingers · 03/06/2015 18:38

Yep. As soon as this one was abandoned another oh so similar one popped up with another completely and obviously unreasonable OP in an amazingly similar posting style...

GRT · 03/06/2015 18:38

I'm a man, and I think DH should not go around being really contemptuous and rude to other blokes then pissing and running away when it goes wrong for him.

I am of a more stable and gentle temperament than to go around behaving like that, but who knows if I had been kept awake all night and spoken to like that, I think I might have chucked him in a flipping wheelie bin!

BabyMurloc · 03/06/2015 18:40

One of our neighbours had a party like this a few years back now. It was horrific. We spent hours awake trying to settle screaming kids hoping they would be considerate enough to turn music down. People knocked on and were ignored (we reakon they couldn't hear us) Took us 3 days to get back to human afterwards. It wasn't a close neighbour either. Sound REALLY carries if you have windows/doors open or outside. We were 7 houses up and couldn't sleep with the noise.

One of the other neighbours had a polite word a couple of days later. They admitted they were being UR, explained the reason for the party (was actually a huge well deserved celebration) and put a sorry note through all our doors.

They still party on occasion now as especially in summer we can hear them BUT they go inside and turn the music right down/off at midnight. No one has complained to them since to my knowledge and we have no long standing feuds.

Comments like your DHs are the reason isolated incidents end up as long running disputes. All your neighbour was probably looking for was a simple sorry. He DEFINATELY shouldn't have threatened and assulted your DH BUT I totally understand why he did it.

If this isn't your first party then you've been incredibly lucky no one has ever complained to you before.

Klayden · 03/06/2015 18:40

You sound lovely. Grin

Klayden · 03/06/2015 18:41

P.S welcome to MN!

Maryz · 03/06/2015 18:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Aermingers · 03/06/2015 18:47

Yep. Another one.

DownWithThisTypeOfThing · 03/06/2015 18:50

Do people still say "get a life?".

NoisyOyster · 03/06/2015 18:52

What's it about aermingers?

maddening · 03/06/2015 18:54

Was the party outside?

WhatIActuallySaid · 03/06/2015 18:59

OP, Shock

Hmm
BeenWondering · 03/06/2015 19:00

GRT No need to start your post declaring that you are a man Hmm
A lot of posters often disagree regardless of their gender.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 03/06/2015 19:03

Is the other thread in AIBU as thoroughly charming and believable as this one?

Have I got to use AS or can you give us a clue :)

LadyTmalia · 03/06/2015 19:06

Having to get up at 04:00 on a Sunday (and also Sat and Mon) I would be pretty pissed off as well, especially if I was told to "get a life" I am so glad you are not my neighbours.

Maryz · 03/06/2015 19:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Zebda · 03/06/2015 19:12

I dont have anything new to add, I'm with the 99.9% of posters on this thread who agree YABVVU and and also may I note that you and your DH seem quite selfish and twatty.

posting for the deletion message

Sallystyle · 03/06/2015 19:12

My neighbour had a party like that a few weeks ago and it was fucking awful.

I posted about it here at the time as I was still sitting up at 4.00am.

I HATE people like you who have no respect for their neighbours. Go hire a hall or something if you want a party that is loud and lasts all night. A house with neighbours is not a appropriate place to have it.

If you were my neighbour and your husband told me to get a life after I had been awake all night I would want to hit him too. I wouldn't, but I would want to.

My other neighbour had a party recently too. He put a note through my door and said he would make sure the party ended at 12.00. On the dot the music came off and people left. I have a lot of respect for him for that.

TantrumsAndBalloons · 03/06/2015 19:14

I know MaryZ

I keep opening threads and wondering why people are posting actual replies to some of this stuff.

Fluffyears · 03/06/2015 19:16

I had noisy neighbours who had parties that went on for days even on weeknights (as they didn't work). You are a cunt op and I don't use that word lightly but you and your thick husband are massive inconsiderate cunts and I want to shake your neighbours hand.

TheChandler · 03/06/2015 19:18

Your neighbour sounds like a man who has been driven to the end of his tether. The fact your other neighbour witnessed it and did nothing speaks volumes. I bet your neighbour hasn't had problems with anyone else.

Normal people don't have noisy weekend long parties that disturb their neighbours and when they do make noise, they leave a note in advance to apologise with a contact number or go round and apologise in person for any disturbance, preferably with a bottle of wine, flowers or chocolates.

Bigger question - why are there so many people on mumsnet who lack basic social skills, who need these things explained to them? And what an unfortunate coincidence that two of them are married to each other. Are they over-represented on the internet possibly?

DoraGora · 03/06/2015 19:24

Bigger question - why are there so many people on mumsnet who lack basic social skills, who need these things explained to them?

Because, posting things like, I killed a toad and put it in my son's sandwich and he was sick for a week, was I unreasonable, and then watching several tens of people try to answer it sensibly, is great fun, for some people who've got nothing better to do, maybe?

Aermingers · 03/06/2015 20:06

Well put it this way. In the other thread they appear not to know that 3x31 = 93. They think it = 18....