Should I talk about this toddler group volunteer to his carer?

[RachelWatts]

I attend a weekly toddler group with 2 year old DS2.

The key holder of the toddler group is a learning-disabled young man, who opens up and sets the toys out, then stays throughout the session and packs away at the end.

I tend to arrive early, straight after the school run, and help him set up.

One of the 'rules' of the toddler group is that the slide and trampoline must be on a mat before the children use them, but because of the way they are stored, the mats are the last things out of the shed.

This morning, the trampoline was the first thing unpacked, so DS2 ran for it and tried to climb on.

In order to prevent DS2 getting on the trampoline, the volunteer grabbed the trampoline and pulled it away, which caused DS2, who was halfway onto it at the time, to be tipped off and he banged his head on the floor.

Not surprisingly, he cried, and the volunteer told him off for 'throwing himself on the floor'.

I picked up DS2, and while comforting him, told the volunteer that no, DS2 had fallen when he moved the trampoline, and hadn't thrown himself to the floor in a display of temper.

WIBU to talk to one of the care assistants at his home (who I know personally as we went to the same toddler group with our DC1s) about this incident?

I'm not sure this young man understands that in enforcing the 'no trampolining without a mat' rule, he caused the scenario which the rule is there to prevent, as a child fell off the trampoline and hurt himself (although not seriously)

I agree five

I can see that I was perhaps expecting that the other volunteer would behave as a NT person would, which was unreasonable.

I also don't know what role a support worker has, and wondered if perhaps I should point out instances where I thought more support was needed. You have all helped me realise that I should not, but talk to him as I would to any other person.

It Wasn't down to the carelessness of the other adult. It was down to the carelessness of the OP.

"I hate these threads where people pile in on the OP!"

Yeah, of course, lots of people disagreeing is 'piling in'. Nobody has been abusive or broken the T&Cs, so I don't see why we should feel forced to agree.

It was clearly both their fault; the other volunteer for pulling away the trampoline and the OP for not supervising closely enough. Either way, it wasn't a serious incident and it probably won't be repeated because the OP know is aware that she needs to supervise her child more closely.

If he didn't have LDs he wouldn't have a support worker I could wonder about talking to, would he? And I mention he is male because, well, he is, and it makes no difference. It seemed unnecessarily clumsy to refer to him any other way.

I've apologised and accepted I was wrong.

Any other posts are purely to point out what a terrible person I am and try to pick holes in my story, and I've had enough.

bishop
The helper pulled the trampoline from under her little boy.
The op being 'remiss' is totally irrelevant.
I do think someone needs to remind him to be careful. In my experience, lots of mums don't watch their kids.
It might happen again. It is possible he'd get in to trouble next time. That wouldn't be fair as he is obviously doing his best / taking his job seriously.

I wondered if perhaps I should point out instances where more support was needed
But his support worker doesn't actually attend the sessions, and has in fact asked that you be "on hand to offer guidance"?
Is he in fact just adhering to policies you and the other mums have put in place? It's hard to see what you want his support worker to do when you don't adhere to those same guidelines yourself.

mrs l do see your point. :)
I'm thinking that his reaction wasn't ideal though.
I just think he would benefit from a reminder.
Don't you think it is possible he might do it again?

No, l did cheeky

I was supervising him. He tried to climb on a trampoline, and I was not close enough to stop him before the other adult in the room intervened.

Normally this would not be a problem, but the action taken was inappropriate and potentially dangerous.

I did not anticipate his reaction, as I was expecting him to behave as a NT adult would.

DS2 is only just 2, and impulsive as almost all toddlers are. Climbing on a trampoline is well within his capabilities and not dangerous in the least, which is why I didn't sprint to catch him.

I don't believe anyone is 'to blame' for this incident.

Sounds like you shouldn't be there before the playgroup is ready to open as it isn't safe.

I would wait outside and let the bloke get on with his job.

Surely the best solution would be to work out a different way of arranging the equipment so the mats are the first thing out, not the last? Then this won't happen again regardless of what anyone, child or adult, does.

You are blaming the volunteer though you are not saying well maybe I should have waitecfor the 3rd volunteer lesson learned for next week i suppose btw did you fill out an qccident report

I was supervising him. He tried to climb on a trampoline, and I was not close enough to stop him before the other adult in the room intervened

Your idea of supervision clearly isn't mine. You weren't supervising, you didn't stop your son, you were then "a bit short" with the person setting up, even though it was your fault. Your DS is your responsibility, therefore your lack of supervision is the cause of the accident.

I understand where you are coming from mrs
My adult brother has learning differences.
I can imagine he'd stick to rules in the same situation.
As his reaction wasn't ideal though, l just feel a gentle reminder might help? I don't know?