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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed this woman asked my husband to zip her dress up?

347 replies

mynameisvivienne · 17/05/2015 21:38

My friend had a house party last night for her birthday. She has a large kitchen so most of us were in there when a random woman asked my husband to zip her dress up as it was coming down at the back.

She was with friends and has never met my husband (or me) ever before.

Aibu to have been annoyed?

OP posts:
Iliveinalighthousewiththeghost · 17/05/2015 22:28

You're not being unreasonable. How you feel is how you feel. Some of us it would bother others not so much and some not at all.
To be honest I would find it s bit forward especially if she didn't even know us but my intuition tells me there was no malice intended

Happybodybunny12 · 17/05/2015 22:29

Oh and op you must remember to be a successful mumsnetter you absolutely must accept your dh has numerous female friends who he meets regularly and if you don't like this you are a crazy jealous bitch.

Grin
Original poster
mynameisvivienne · 17/05/2015 22:30

Any chance you were giving her dirty looks, OP?

Not that I am aware of. I was too busy catching up with people I hadn't seen in a while.

I think that's really mean and just jumping on the lets make fun of the Op bandwagon.

Thank you Bambambini, only just read this.

OP posts:
Original poster
mynameisvivienne · 17/05/2015 22:32

Also op if she's never met you or your husband before how the heck would she know you are both married?! Were you in a vice like grip with him?!

He had his arm around my waist when she asked him.

So yes she might not have known we were married but I think it's pretty obvious that we were at least together.

OP posts:
Gralick · 17/05/2015 22:33

A woman at a party flirted mildly with your partner.

OK.

Confused
WalterMittyish · 17/05/2015 22:33

I was too busy catching up with people I hadn't seen in a while.

In which case it was possible she hadn't noticed that you and he were together, so didn't realise that an approach was out of order.

WalterMittyish · 17/05/2015 22:34

Ooops, cross-posted

Happybodybunny12 · 17/05/2015 22:34

Well you sound completely fine to me op. She was flirting of course but best ignored.

Never be jealous on aibu. It's a complete no no. Grin

FirstWeTakeManhattan · 17/05/2015 22:34

OP, why do you think she was flirting? It isn't clear at all. You've just said 'he pulled her zip up.' That's it. You got on with your night.

I find it vaguely disheartening that it's not just men who can be guilty of interpreting a woman's every move as a bloody come on.

bottleofbeer · 17/05/2015 22:35

Well actually, I think she was rude. He's standing there with his wife (arm around her waist) and she asks him to zip her up? I'm not even the jealous type but I'd raise an eyebrow at that.

Original poster
mynameisvivienne · 17/05/2015 22:35

Oh and op you must remember to be a successful mumsnetter you absolutely must accept your dh has numerous female friends who he meets regularly and if you don't like this you are a crazy jealous bitch.

I do not allow him to have any female friends. I only allow him to use his mobile phone for half an hour each evening under my supervision. If he ever gets invited to a night out/stag do I will make sure that I attend too otherwise he is forbidden.

I'm thinking of buying him blinker hoods that you use for horses. That way it will hopefully limit the amount of women he sees.

OP posts:
icelollycraving · 17/05/2015 22:36

Well you're entitled to feel however you want. It very much depends on how she asked,the setting etc. Quite possible she was flirting but he left with you,is married to you,don't let it worry you any more.

Original poster
mynameisvivienne · 17/05/2015 22:39

I find it vaguely disheartening that it's not just men who can be guilty of interpreting a woman's every move as a bloody come on.

I really do not interpret every move a woman makes in regards to my husband that she's coming on to him.

But really if you were stood with a group of friends and you noticed your zip was coming down at the back, who would you ask to zip it up -

  1. One of your friends who you are already stood with and talking to.
  2. A random man you're not stood with and have never spoken to him before.
OP posts:
Gralick · 17/05/2015 22:40

@ 22:35 Grin

You could add a harness with the blinkers.

PeachyPants · 17/05/2015 22:43

Good on you for keeping your sense of humour OP, you have had some really twatty responses here.

BluebeardsSidekick · 17/05/2015 22:43

"Well actually, I think she was rude."

"Excuse me, could you be kind enough to pull my zip up? Thank you so much" = Not rude.

"Oi! You, you jug eared cunt! Do my fucking zip up before I kick you in the nadgers!" = Rude.

Roseforarose · 17/05/2015 22:44

OP, why do you think she was flirting?
Because she asked a stranger who had his arm round his partner to pull her zip up. Maybe she thought she was turning him on. Whatever, it was flirting.

icelollycraving · 17/05/2015 22:44

Blinker hoods Grin

Gabilan · 17/05/2015 22:46

"I think it's wrong to openly flirt with someone infront of their partner."

I'm in deep trouble then. But I only ever do it as a bit of a laugh because it's funny, not because I have any designs on the partner. On the occasions when I've had a partner who someone else has flirted with, I take it as a compliment that they fancy him too.

If someone had serious designs on a partner of mine I'd be totally pissed off, but a bit of harmless drunken flirting at a party? I'd ask yourself why it's annoying you so much OP.

WorraLiberty · 17/05/2015 22:48

"Oi! You, you jug eared cunt! Do my fucking zip up before I kick you in the nadgers!"=Rude.

I actually did laugh my arse right off at that ^^ Grin

ghostyslovesheep · 17/05/2015 22:49

blimey if asking a random to zip up the top of your zip is considered by some as 'flirting' I'd be hot footing it down to flirt school and asking for a refund pronto

PeachyPants · 17/05/2015 22:50

Who is it funny for Gabilan? If the man who your flirting or his partner doesn't find it funny is it still ok? You decide that it's funny with the wrong woman and you'll end up glassed.

Happybodybunny12 · 17/05/2015 22:51

Op that's funny. Great post.

What I find amazing is other adults are so innocent they really can't recognise a flirt when they see one.

SumThucker · 17/05/2015 22:52

You decide that it's funny with the wrong woman and you'll end up glassed.

Jesus, what kind of parties do you go to Confused

DonVitoCorleone · 17/05/2015 22:53

It would annoy me aswell OP