School closes for memorial

[memorial]

Small village primary school, about 120 children from nursery to Yr 6.
A young girl is diagnosed with a brain tumour a few years ago, and died last week. She has a younger sibling in the school. Obviously all the teachers are heartbroken.
But a lot of the children and parents dont know her or her family. Her year group are now in Year 7 so have left the primary.
The school is closing early at 12pm for the memorial. There are obviously a fair number of families who wont go as they have no link or ties to this little girl. But equally all the teachers want to go, and there will be a good number of children and families going.
The memorial is at 1:30pm very close to the school.
There are some disgruntled parents that the whole school is closing.
I am purposefully not saying which side of this I am on.
Is the school BU to close early?

If this happened in the primary school my youngest attends (year 6) where all her older 3 siblings has attended I would be disgusted with the school for NOT closing.

Years ago when I was in school a boy was killed in a traffic accident. I was in year 7 he was year 8 they allowed year 8 9 and 10 to go to the funeral with all their teachers and held a assembly for year R through to 7 (In Denmark you go to 1 school year R through to 10) I can still now 30 years on recall that assembly. Likely aided by my also knowing the boy and those of us in Y7 felt left out for not being allowed to go to the funeral)

Sorry Baltimore but you are way off course here. What a relief that there are sensible, grounded people who have taken this decision and who are not swayed by people like you who appear to assign the importance of a traffic ticket to a child's death.

FFS if they begrudge having to sort an extra days cover WHEN SOMEONE HAS LOST THEIR CHILD then they'd be off my friends list and told exactly what I thought of them.

Fucking hell Baltimore. Please post your real name so I can make sure you're not an real life friend of mine. Jesus what a lovely person you are.

Why could they not hold the memorial service in the school with the local vicar present? It's not the funeral, therefore it is a service for people who are not close to the family but would like to repay their respects nonetheless. If it affects the whole school then let the whole school attend - including the pupils. Or better still, hold it in the school.

Primary schools are special places where staff get to know and nurture both the pupils and their families.they are a community, and this child was part of that community and family. It's lovely that the school is closing , just because a family member has moved out of town doesn't mean we forget them or stop caring for them. The staff will have built up a special relationship with this family and it is right that they are all able to attend the memorial along with members of the village community.

amybear ok so your school is smaller still, but certainly not the norm! 120 IS small for a primary school - mixed years groups in classes, one teacher teaching them for 2 years etc etc. Our DCs school is 320, that's still only a class and a half per year group, BIL is head at a primary of 550!! so 120 is small in my book.

off track, but I worked in a school of 80 children, the deputy head was a spinster in her 60s (but looking older as quite "old fashioned") who had taught there ever since she qualified, she had taught generations of that village.

The parents are upset that the school is closing for an afternoon. How heartless, they have to look after their own kids for a few hours, someone has lost their own child forever. They could spend the time appreciating what they have. A few years ago, two children died in an accident in my community - it was devastating. Everyone was affected, absolutely heartbreaking. I doubt anyone would have dared complain about any type of memorial. Death is sad, but a young life not lived is tragic, not to be treated like an inconvenience.

"Shutting up shop"?? "No longer taking responsibility"??

Baltimore, I can only assume you are being deliberately provocative. Schools are NOT centers of childcare (and even if they were it wouldn't change the outcome). Supporting the family and the community, teaching children that there are some things far more important than jobs and careers and being tired and holidays etc, and - I'll say it even though it's unfashionable in this day and age - doing the right thing is the very definition of taking responsibility.

Pfffft. Your posts are something else.

I am a teacher and have attended two funerals in work time with full blessing from the head - one was an ex-pupil who had been in my form for five years and one was the husband of a member of staff - well-liked and friendly with much of the department. In fact in the case of the latter we got told as many of the dept as wanted could go - about five of us did as we knew him quite well.

Baltimore- even those families who do not know the child or her family can be affected by this. It is a great lesson in compassion for the children, and that sometimes life DOESN'T go on, and taking pause to count ones blessings is a very important thing.

I think a lot of very valuable lessons can be learned, by adults & children alike.

I just typed long reply that got eaten but I was going to say I must be the first but glad I have company. I do think the school is being a little unreasonable. The child and class have left the school. If the family knew how important it was for every single teacher over the last 8y to be there wouldn't it have been better arranged on a weekend?
By all means give children families who want to go permission so it's not unauthorised and all that, but sort out cover/supply so those that are not going can stay in school.
Has every single teacher been there and taught that child so couldn't possible not go?
Sadly there are school age children that die every day but schools do t entirely shut down so people can go do they? It's a lovely gesture but inconvenience for those who have to juggle their days around it. That's just fact.

I agree with you MrsDV. Probably the school will have some sort of "special assembly", say a prayer or light a candle if it's a church school, but that's not at all the same as the main memorial service. why ruin that for the family by having it with with 100s of fidgetty children. How could the teachers have their own quiet thoughtful time when dealing with toilet requests and runny noses etc? And what about consoling lots of upset kiddies? It is right the school should close and parents can judge for themselves whether they/their children should attend the memorial - or just have an extra special cuddle on the sofa and count their blessings.

One afternoon of inconvenience compared to a lifetime without your child. How can fellow parents be so heartless?

You're quite right Akire, it is an 'inconvenience' the death of a child usually is.

Our much larger primary school after one of the pupils died, it was a lovely mark of respect and enabled those who wanted to go to the funeral the chance.

It's one afternoon in many many more, the mother doesn't have her child any more.

People are so selfish, teachers are human and of course they should be able to attend and shouldn't have to be looking after 120 children while they are paying their respects.

People who are being "inconvenienced" should thank God they have a child to look after.

Lots missing the point. This isn't about the deceased child or the bereaved family.Whether the school is open or closed really makes no difference to their situation.

It is about the rights and responsibilities of school staff. Does their desire to attend the memorial, override their duty to provide a service to the children who do not wish to go?

amybear, yes it does.

the saddest thing is that these parents and the likes of baltimore only think of themselves and what it all means to them so here have one of these and hope that nothing ever happens to you and yours

the school is DNBU and has taken a position of support compassion, its the only humane and moral way to behave and isn't that the greatest of lessons right there.

I think the school was put in an impossible position by the decision to make the memorial service during the school day time. 3:30 onwards would have made this a non-issue. As this is the memorial service, not the funeral, I would assume this isn't for the family as such, more a chance for the school and local community to pay their respects away from the actual funeral - surely this was expected to be an event full of the teachers and children who knew her?

It's sadly is understandable for working parents who didn't know the family in any way to be a bit pissed off about having to cover another half day, its not always the case that people have helpful grandparents to cover time off, or holiday leave they can take, or even have the sort of job where a day can be taken off at short notice - there will be a significant number of those complaining who will now have a huge childcare headache. Just because the reason for the school closure is a perfectly valid one doesn't make those problems go away.

I still think the school made the right choice to close, it's just sad they were put in the position where they will be causing huge problems for some people when they could have been avoided.