to wonder how anyone doesn't eat their five a day

[underpaidworker]

Without even trying I usually eat 10+ portions a day, I just can't think how anyone doesn't have at least 5 a day.

Today ive had
oats with kiwi and banana
Apple to snack
Chicken pasta with tomatoes, courgette, onion garlic peppers mushrooms (3 portions at least)
Greek salad tomatoes, cucumber, avocado Basil red onion

And now currently snacking on carrots and humous

Who has time for all that veg stuff, when there is
CAKE

Gin - several portions. It has juniper berries in it so that's OK.

20 fags - tobacco is a plant - so that counts.

Ketchup - that's a fruit so that's OK.

Beer - barley, hops & maybe some wheat.

I reckon I've had at least 20 helpings.

ODFOD, OP, just ODFOD.

PS - I am lying about my diet today - I have actually subsisted on other stuff!

We get through quite a lot of veg, but we hardly eat any fruit. DS1 loathes it. It doesn't agree with me (gives me griping tum and the runs) and DH can't get through enough of it, so we gave up buying it and chucking half of it away.

I agree with others who've pointed out the hidden cost of preparing and cooking veg.

I scoffed a chip butty before scooting off to voluntary work. Stick that in your smug pipe.

I barely got 5 a week let alone 5 a day.

I have started to have home made smoothie for breakfast usually having kale, carrot, banana, pineapple, berries, water and a raw egg in.

I've also started to have salad for lunch.

However it's really hard to have 5 a day. Apple or chocolate. I know which I prefer. I'm just on a health kick ATM.

Well some days are better than others arent they. I always take fruit into work as I tend to boredom eat and it stops me eating too many biscuits. Then I normally have veg with my evening meal unless its something like curry or pizza.

Today I've been at home so oat-so-simple which has bits of dried strawberry in, peanut butter on toast and yoghurt for lunch and fish from the chippy with mushy peas for my tea. And I'm not convinced that the mushy peas actually contain any veg! Glass of wine and a crunchie.

Can someone explain me the emoticon, I thought biscuits were good things like cake?

Today I mostly ate;
1 banana
a chinese buffet
toast
packet of salt and vinegar.
shortbread biscuits.
panna cotta

I am alive and well thanks very much

Toast and tea for breakfast
Youngs Admirals fish pie for lunch
Rice, chicken and variety of vegetables for dinner

Don't think I've done too badly today except for the large galaxy chocolate bar I ate in between meals

Because all the things on your list sound cold and crunchy and not very comforting to eat. Whereas hot buttered toast and lemon curd for breakfast is lush. I did unusually squeeze in a pear and some tomatoes with my lunch (ploughman type affair) but McDonalds for tea only had a bit of shredded lettuce in it although the hot apple pie must count as one portion surely

Basically, fruit and veg are a chore to prepare and to eat. Biscuits aren't. HTH.

ROFL! OP you so silly! You move the garnish to the side of the plate, you don't count it as a main meal, you daft bugger!

I start the day with raisins, sultanas and dried apricots on weetabakes (fake weetabix) which is three to start with. (because otherwise I may not manage five)

I then have good days. (salad or stir fry for lunch) or bad days. carbs and cheese. tea is usually three portions of veggies minimum.

bad days about 6-7 good days 10+ if I am not careful and accidently eat about 15 (not made that mistake too often) then the next day is a bad day.... oh yes...

children dd: 10 plus on a school day
ds: 10 on a school day.

I am a bit lazier at the weekend and forget to give them so many pieces of salad or fruit though dd helps herself from the fridge.

I can also put away an enormous amount of junk food when stressed too so not good.

YABU for saying 'oats' just say porridge for crying out loud.

It's much healthier to say 'oat's doncha know. It leads to increased heart health and increased smuggery.

I didn't read past the OP. I'd like to do a slow clap and say 'Bully for you'. and your arse must be wrecked

I've got a nked bar for desert, also 1 more of my 5 a day

channels Peter Kay

Ever kissed a [boy]?

85g of rocket leaves or similar is ... a lot. Ten portions? Well that's practically a compost heaps' worth.

Read the op, realised you're a twat (a healthy twat) and stopped reading. Bet your farts are potent.

Argh, obvs nothing new with slow hand claps and comments about arse chafing. Important to maintain integrity and form objective opinion though happily in tune with the general attitude.

Today I ate:

1. No breakfast, fuck that. Oh, do coffee beans count? It says 'beans', I think it does.
2. Lunch: proper actual beans, avocado, tomato, lettuce, bread rejected.
3. Dinner: falafel, roasted peppers, slice of halloumi, salad, bread rejected why do I keep putting bread on stuff?

4 Dessert: a selection of wheat, grapes and juniper.

I'm a fricking vegetarian and don't get my 5 a day every day! Especially as (as I understand) potatoes don't count and if you have more than one - it doesn't count. So today - toast (nope), roll and cheese (nope), egg chips and peas (one) and then thought best have an apple, but only with cheese. Pretty sure grapes, in the guise of wine, don't count! Some days I have shitloads, but today I've wanted bread, cheese and wine, boff!

I don't believe you don't really know why!

I easily get 5+ a day but that's because:
a) I have a very limited diet (meat, fish, eggs, olive oil, fruit and veg only)
b) I don't have to budget my food shop especially carefully

That's just a combination of good luck in not being short of money and bad luck/stupidity in having such crazy food 'rules'.

Today (like almost every day), I've had:

raspberries for breakfast (1.5 portions)
tuna, cucumber, lettuce and celery for lunch (prob 2 portions)
chicken and peppers for tea (2-3 portions - I eat a hell of a lot of pepper!)
more peppers, strawberries and a pear as snacks (4-5 portions)

I almost never have any cooked fruit or veg. I don't know if that's a bad thing or not.

I don't think I've eaten any fruit or veg today
Unless chocolate counts? It comes from a fruit, right?

In my defence I am suffering from morning sickness and eat whatever makes me feel least sick.

OP, berries aside, humans aren't really supposed to eat lots of fruit.....they're supposed to eat lots of veg.
It really annoys me when chefs, schools and NHS generally over big-up the fruit side of it when in actual fact, fruit is awful for your teeth.

Dentist hate the whole 'drink more smoothies' thing. The fruit acid isn't good for dental health and it ferments in your digestive system, causing over growth of yeast and then mould.

I just can't think how anyone doesn't have at least 5 a day

Then you may be healthy but you apparently have no ability to think beyond your own smugness. There are many reasons why the diets of so many are so poor.

Just one example - if I am too tired to make a lovely healthy packed lunch the night before because I got up at 5am to travel to court and I hope the court I am going to might have a nice canteen but o dear its been shut down so its prawn flavoured crisps from the vending machine for lunch again.

Or maybe I am really poor and have no money and have to go to a food bank but they seem to have run out of quinoa so I will just get some tins of something instead

Have a think. I bet you can think of some more.

Toast and jam and peanut butter for breakfast, with coffee

Lunch. I didnt really eat lunch. I ate some food a couple times during the day. I have had a banana most days this week, but as there is one very spotty one sitting in the bowl, I dont think I did today. What did I eat non-lunchwise, i really dont know. Some tortilla chips, but I couldnt be bothered heating up beans to go with them. A piece of cheese that was going to go on top. nachos were the plan, but i couldnt be bothered.

A chocolate roll thing and tea when my son got home from school.

A calzone that had maybe half a courgette in it, and a tomato and meat sauce.

So Courgette and tomato, that's 2.

We bought strawberries for dessert, but didnt eat them afterall.

Yesterday was better. i know there were at least 4. I have better plans for tomorrow.