AIBU to ask your most embarrassing moment ever?

[ShootPeppaPig]

Just for a chuckle?

Mine is when I wet myself during the festival of voices aged 7. I know lots of kids wet themselves - mine just happened to be during a concert with all my classmates feet in the puddle for the remainder of the song, I was wearing a long dress and somehow thought I could style it out.

I couldn't

When I was in law school, we had a day at court and we were leaving the court coming down the stairs and I tripped and fell down about 20 stairs.
I landed on the floor in a heap in front of 10 judges and barristers,
My heel broke,my files were everywhere and my skirt split right up the back. It was the single most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to me, I still cringe when I think about it.

On holiday in Cuba with DH (then DP).

Wearing a white skirt that wasn't exactly see-through but was so thin you would be able to see whatever knickers I was wearing so went without.

At the piano bar, suddenly have a dicky tummy..need to fart, ends up being a shart.

It's so hot I have no cardigan, top, nothing. Just a vest and this skirt.

Sit in the seat for a good 20 minutes before I can pluck up the courage to investigate quite how bad things are.

Wasn't actually too bad but I noticed the woman from another couple pointing and whispering to her DH as I walk past

Oh, another one from when I was about 16.

Went camping with about 6 friends to this very alternative festival in Ireland. Me and my friends were all quite into that guitar-playing white person with dreads thing

Anyway, there was a campfire going on, I went off for a wee and came back to sit around the campfire. My eyesite wasn't very good but I didn't have glasses at that point so I'm kumbaya-ing and smoking a spliff or whatever and go to sit down on a rucksack that's lying on the grass.

Except as I sit down I realise it isn't a rucksack, it's a guy asleep on the grass in the foetal position and I've just sat on his head.

I was 16 or 17 and was quite drunk. I ended up having sex with a guy in his car and left my mismatched underwear behind. Thanks to Sod's law, it was some of my most awful underwear

He text me the next day to ask if I wanted to collect it. Thankfully he'd put it in a bag and left it in the glove compartment, then took a tactfully long time picking something up from his parents' house, leaving me in the car alone. It took me a while to pluck up the courage to get it out in case he came back. It was only a few years after the event that I appreciated how well he'd dealt with the situation to minimise my embarrassment.

had a strange swelling type lump in my vagina and a rather fishy smell for a few weeks, particularly uncomfortable during sex.

Decided to go to see the doctor as I was getting worried about it. She asked me to lie on the couch and did an examination, after a minute or so she said "Oh it's nothing to worry about" as she pulled an old forgotten stinky tampon out. Couldn't get out the room quick enough!

oh tolivebythesea that happened to my sister too, except she had a male doctor who opened the window and stared spraying air freshener!!!

A poo one.

I suffer with intermittent lactose intolerance. Sometimes I'm fine with dairy but other times I am struck down horrific stomach cramps and projectile diarrhoea.

I normally get a warning of 10 minutes from 1st contraction-like stomach cramp to the point of no return.

On way back from late pub sunday lunch with parents and my 2 children, youngest of who is 1 yo at the time (just last year)
As we are driving I get an intense cramp. Ask my dad to find toilets now. No chance, it's 5pm.on a Sunday and we are at least 10 minutes from home, there is nowhere, not even bushes as we are on the outskirts of town centre.

Dad pulls into an empty supermarket car park, by this time I sound like I'm in full Labour, I'm in agony and trying to hold on to everything.

As he stops the car I yell "GET OUT NOW" at which point mum, dad, DC1 do A-Team esque leaps from the car, leaving DS in his car seat (sat next to me) as I projectile shit all over the seat I'm in. It went on for an hour (ok, maybe 30-40seconds). I was crying, DS was oblivious and my mum and dad were bent double laughing but also absolutely horrified at what I'd done to their car.

We laugh about it now...

I was 13 and had just started my periods. Our dog decided to rummage through the bathroom bin. He pulled out a used sanitary towel and left it at the bottom of the stairs, where it unfurled. My Dad found it, called me over and said "is this yours?", as if I had accidentally left it there.

I still can't tell anyone this story in real life!

Was asked by (female) Dr at Family Planning clinic ,who had just instructed me on how to insert a cap, if I would mind showing a student Dr how it was done . For those of you who don't know , the easiest way is to stand with one foot on a chair and proceed . I had had a baby by then and figured nothing could be more embarassing, and it was my duty to help train the next generation of dctors... . For some reason I had assumed said student would be female.They were male, very young and drop- dead gorgeous (I was 36) The only consolation was I think he was rather more embarassed than I .

Mine have largely involved interviews of some sort:

When I was 16 and had an interview for a really posh 6th form college and had selected (amongst others) to read English Literature the interviewer asked me about some of my favourite books. I responded by telling her the latest book I'd read was Charlotte Bronte by Jane Eyre and how much I really admired the novels of the esteemed author Jane Eyre. She paused for a moment and said "Oh, I thought it was actually Charlotte Bronte that had written Jane Eyre, but I could of course be wrong." (I didn't get offered a place).

In my twenties I had an interview for a job which was clearly out of my league but as they'd invited me to an interview I thought I was definitely in with a chance. The hot-shot lawyer that interviewed me realised quite quickly that I was out of my depth and asked me how I'd deal with corruption in governments. I said that I thought it was totally wrong and they shouldn't be corrupt. He asked me what I'd do about it if I could do anything and I said that I'd get Kofi Annan to get them all around a table to talk. His response "and drink tea with some nice biscuits while they talk presumably?" (I didn't get offered that job.)

About 5 years ago I was the newest member of the office management team and myself and 3 other managers, including our senior manager and also the dean, were sharing a car to drive to our faculty Xmas lunch.

While getting into the car I found myself struggling to move the front passenger seat forward enough to climb into the backseat.
The other manager whose car it was gave me a bit of a strange look and said 'you can just use the door to get in...' at which point I noticed it was a 5 door car and that I had been trying to get to my seat in the back through the front door!

I managed to sheepishly explain that it had been a while since I had used any car other than my Mini cooper. Still felt like complete wally however!

I was once walking around a supermarket vaguely aware I was being followed by a little girl. Assuming her parent was somewhere near I didn't pay any notice other than realising she was starting to make a bit of a mess.

About 5 minutes later a guy comes up to me and starts shouting at me that I should pay better attention to what my daughter's doing. Doesn't let me get a word in edgeways and is shouting at me in front of lots of onlookers.

Finally I explain and look around for the girl's parents who are nowhere to be seen. I take the girl's hand to take her to customer services and try and lead her away from the merry hell she's creating at which point she shouts at the top of her lungs 'you're not my mummy get away from me, you can't tell me what to do'. Luckily a store assistant had been keeping an eye on us and came over chuckling to deal with the situation. Didn't help that I was 19 at the time with no experience of children!

Oh God, I so needed this thread today! It's priceless. Hmm, too many to choose from - let's go with the time I was driving slowly down a residential road and saw a squashed hedgehog in the middle of the road. Slowed down and said "oh, poor hedgie", failing to notice the car with four firemen in it, sitting STATIONARY at the junction. They watched in disbelief as I slowly drove into their car, whilst looking at the hedgehog. They were very nice and escorted me home as I was crying......

I have loads
The worst one though..
I was moving into to my accommodation (live in hotel receptionist) when bf and I decided to 'christen' my new bed
We were in the throes of passion when there was a knock at the door, then the hotel owner let himself into my room to discover me and bf 'at it'
Oh my goodness he exclaimed before beating a hasty retreat
i was mortified, bf found it hilarious.

Age about 14. On school ski trip. Early one morning, sleepily need the loo. Go down corridor to communal toilets. Push door of cubicle which seems a bit stuck. There's my male history teacher sat on the bog, salopettes round ankles.

I was 18 and at a club with mixed group of friends, included one guy who I fancied so much. I

On a trip to the toilet, a friend convinced me to waltz back in to the room, grab the guy I liked and snog his face off then we'd inevitably go home together.

So I sashay back into the club, grab the back of this guy's hair, use that to spin myself round, straddle him and snog his face off.

Turns out it wasn't the guy I liked, just some other random quite ugly bloke in a white T-shirt. The guy I liked was sitting a couple of sofas looking and laughing.

I still cringe thinking abour that 15 years later

Can we have some more? I'm working from home today and need the distraction.

Aright then. One of many. When I was about 15/16 I was sitting round a dinner table with my (first) boyfriend and best friend. We were, like, having a deep conversation, you know? The table was totally clear, nothing on it. I laughed at something and a significantly sized lump of crust flew out of my nose and on to the table in front of all three of us. And there it sat, unmoving. I was speechless with embarrassment. No-one said anything. No-one moved. Instead of making a witty quip and getting a hankie I leaned my arm over it (white cardigan I remember) and covered it up, hoping somehow no one had seen it. Then I sort of smeared it away with my arm, still hoping no-one had seen it. (They both had and were staring at me open-mouthed). It took me years to get over the embarrassment. If something like that happened to me today, I'd laugh it off and say "Wow! Look at that, I wasn't even aiming there!" Or something.

HOW could this be unreasonable

BLoody AIBU spammers

Opened the floodgates now. When I was about 20 and in my first proper job (very posh PR consultancy) I went out drinking with lots of senior members of staff. We ended the night in a swanky Chinese restaurant in Mayfair. One word - hot towels. Yes, you know where this is going. I was that person.

There was a plate of spring rolls in front of me which looked weird but nice. Wanted to impress the senior managers, you know, open to new experiences, willing to try something different in a restaurant. I tried to cut one of the hot towels in half, with my chopsticks, saying happily "Would anyone like to try one of these with me? Here's half a one".

Can't remember anything after that apart from then waking up, at home, in the middle of the night, laughing my head off realising what I'd done.

Still pished as a fart of course.

My manager thought it was hilarious and so did everyone else, fortunately. I was being polite after all.

I was in my early 20s, in my first professional job and in a test room of PCs with some IT colleagues and external consultants. I was the only female.

I needed a coffee, so thought I'd do a nice thing and offer to bring back coffee for everyone. Unfortunately I picked up my bag upside down and everything spilled onto the floor.

I had come to work straight from my boyfriends house that day and the contents of my bag appeared to consist only of knickers, condoms and tampons. The tampons rolled to the 4 corners of the room and all the males gallantly got on hands and knees and attempted to assist me picking everything up. The horror!!!

An hour later I was back at my desk and one of the colleagues came over with a lilet in his hand and said "I think this is yours".

It was 15 years ago and I still cringe! I'm still friends with one of the guys that was there that day and he brings it up regularly as one of his favourite comedy memories.

Years ago I was teaching in Japan and I had a new business class to teach early one morning in Tokyo. New class, new room. All men, well boys really.

I had written some bits on the board and got everything ready. A couple of the students came in and sat down, sooo polite, quite basic English. Say hi, another couple of guys arrive, all looking super smart arrive and then one more.

He sits down and is the last one on my register so I get up from my chair to shut the door, however my foot ( and I remember I was wearing wedges) somehow gets stuck behind one of the chair legs and as I stand up I come crashing down full bodied onto the floor, hand in the air still ready to close the door

I was mortified. Hadn't even introduced myself. And the students, love them, being typically Japanese, were mortified too and couldn't do enough to help me up.

I have also asked a colleague when she is due in front of other colleagues. I will never, ever ask anyone ever again if they are pregnant or when they are due.

I can't think of anything offhand... and marking place.

My mum when she was older did have an experience when on holiday with friends in Hastings, we were in a pizza restaurant on the sea front and for some reason the crazy DH of her friend decided to root through her bag and pull out one of her Lilets tampons... my mum of course cringed and made some joke and so did he (can't remember what it was).

I do have sort of one - was in a bar in the city with my best mate and her friend and we'd got taken out for dinner and smashed on wine... we then went to said bar and I had blackcurrant sambuca shots - quite a few.... i then remember dancing round with this cute good looking man and then I tripped (was wearing 5 inch high fetching suede shoe boots) and fell over some stupid little small glass table in the corner and my hand was cut and smothered in blood... and also I cracked a rib or two. The cute man took me upstairs with the first aider to get me seen to and was very nice about it! The next day I remembered the pain of the cracked ribs and I've sworn off flavoured sambucas ever since the devils own work.

Showed 16 year old GCSE pupil (male) who I was tutoring at home a photo of myself tied to the bed, legs akimbo while looking for a file to send to his mum. I went 'Woah', he went 'Woah', I clicked off it VERY quickly and neither of us ever said another word about it. Ever since have hoped he thought it was random porn not a picture of me. Stern words with DH afterwards about no more photos or at least save them somewhere hard to find.

I was in university halls and my room was next to a guy I liked. We had recently had a falling out. One morning I got up and realised I had a dodgy stomach.

I needed to get to the toilet quick but was afraid to use my toilet in case he could hear next door (the walls were thin). I thought about going down to the ladies in reception but couldn't bring myself to walk down the flights of stairs with my morning hair, unwashed, pjams etc so decided to use my toilet...

I did everything possible to be quiet, however I made the WORST poo noises ever! After a minute my neighbour suddenly cranked on some music very loudly so we both knew that he had heard everything.

Needless to say I never spoke to him again. I don't think I ever made eye contact with him again and this was a small flat...