AIBU to ask your most embarrassing moment ever?

[ShootPeppaPig]

Just for a chuckle?

Mine is when I wet myself during the festival of voices aged 7. I know lots of kids wet themselves - mine just happened to be during a concert with all my classmates feet in the puddle for the remainder of the song, I was wearing a long dress and somehow thought I could style it out.

I couldn't

I've posted this on here before - happened avout 3 years ago when the dc were 4 and 2.

I picked them up from my mum straight after the gym - so was wearing jogging bottoms and a baseball cap, generally looking like a ruffian.

We nipped in Tesco so that I could get a bottle of wine for dh. I was knackered and wanted to be quick so I put both the dc in the main part of the trolley.

Went to the wine aisle, picked up a bottle and stupidly took my concentration off the DC for a second too long. Turned around and 2 year old ds2 was leaning over the trolley, which was just on tipping point, with a bottle of wine in his hand.

I made a lunge for the wine and the trolley, managed to grab the bottle from ds2 but wasn't quick enough to stop the trolley going completely over on one side. I was off balance and it took me down with it.

So when about 20 strangers came rushing over, I was flat on my back on the floor with a bottle of wine in each hand (wearing my baseball cap and joggers, which just fit the scene beautifully) and an empty trolley on it's side next to me with two dc in who were screaming their heads off (they weren't hurt luckily, just scared).

What did I do? Gesture with the wine (from the floor) and say 'it's not for me, I don't drink'. Which I think sealed people's opinion tbh.

I was 21. I left my house after giving my cat a cuddle goodbye and walked to my (very new) boyfriends house. He opened his door and his cat was there. I bent down to stroke it and it went mad sniffing my fingers. I said 'Oh, he can smell my pussy!'

Have mentioned this before - was seeing the GP once and felt very faint. She kept me in her room for a few minutes and then said she'd walk me through to get a cup of tea, figuring I might have had low blood sugar.

Anyway stood up, ended up hanging onto her as couldn't balance and then I realised my jeans were falling down. I started fumbling, losing my balance more so. She realised what was wrong, stopped me and started trying to sort them.

For some unknown reason she then had her hand inside my jeans to pull them up from there. I was also wearing my very comfy knickers that were 7 years old with no elastic left, that would sort of dissappear over the day. Cue GP, loudly and in hearing distance of waiting room : 'Shouldnt did you go out without your knickers on? I can't find them!'

Thankfully when I did get through noone batted an eyelid - and I had a lovely cuppa and a bit of cake but was mortified at the time.

Both of mine occurred during my teenage years and involved my dad. The first one was where he came home early and caught me practising my sexy dancing to the moulin rouge theme tune. The second time was when he was carrying out some diy and had bought a blowtorch. I had a bit of a slip of the tongue and said 'I didn't know you had a blowjob, how much does one cost?'. He froze, I froze. I literally saw all the colour drain from his face. I think until that moment he had thought I was an innocent little girl and suddenly all his illusions about me were shattered.

DF walked in on then BF and I at it in our bedroom on holiday. Want to say it should teach him not to come into his DD's room without knocking but it was the middle of the afternoon.

More mortifying still was the time I was running for a train in the newly opened St Pancras station which had very slippery shiny floors back then. I skidded several feet across the platform and instinctively reached out to grab something to stop me - the nearest thing was a small girl (maybe age 2 or 3) and I pulled her over with me. Her horrified parents were and . I apologised profusely and leapt on train as doors were closing. If someone did that to DS I'd be and too.

On a crowded tube, went to sit down on a vacated seat at the exact same moment as very good looking man. I ended up planted firmly on his lap. Might have been a good opportunity for some flirty banter, except for the fact that his girlfriend was with him and I was heavily pregnant. They pissed themselves laughing. No dignity left.

mine is pretty minging...maybe TMI...had to hide in a shed to mask my shame.... do you want it??

Years ago when I was young I worked in an office and really, really had a huge crush on my boss. He came over to my desk one day with some paperwork which he put down on my desk to explain what he wanted done. I held my breath because he stood just behind me so he could lean over my shoulder and point at the paper, and he rested his other hand on my shoulder. I was frozen and as well as not breathing, couldn't swallow either. Then he finally asked me a question and when I opened my mouth to speak, all the built up saliva in my mouth poured out onto said paperwork. I don't knwo what happened next because I think I put myself into a self-induced coma of shame.

Come on BubGal tell , tell , tell !

Right ok... well when I was about 13 and new to being on the "blob" period etc. however you refer to it, ANYWAY, had a tip of a bedroom (nothings changed, ha!) and my mum hired a cleaner for a few months to help clean house, a young man. 1 day in rush to go to school, I took my tampon "out" and just threw it in what I thought was bin..then running to get to school. Arrive back from school, go into sparkling new bedroom, floor all clean, only to find something in middle of carpet..yup, my used tampon, carefully arranged with string like a sad face with a note from cleaner, signed as from the tampon, asking in future I make sure I find him a new home, preferably at the bottom of a rubbish bin not my bedroom floor. Cleaner was still in the house, so I shrieked, in horror/shame and ran outside to hide in shed until he was gone. Nothing can top that... surely??!

I can't decide whether that's extremely cheeky of him or brilliant, BubGal

Mine is walking to work in my new winter coat, feeling all smart. Got to work and waved to a colleague, who waved frantically back. I thought that was nice as we didn't particularly get on at the time. She was trying to tell me I had a coat hanger stuck to my back. Not a discreet wire one, a massive wooden crossbar one that had got tucked in my belt and was held firmly and proudly across my back. For a mile and a half down busy roads. Impossible to pass off as any kind of Fashion Statement.

Oh reg, I'm laughing out loud . . .

Took 2yr old DD and 5yr old DS to swimming baths, DD wanted to go on the slide...

Toddler ahead of us in the queue was a bit scared to go down...DD decided to give him a push before his Mum had got behind him.

The woman yelled at me that he couldn't swim , DS ran towards the pool to be hero, the woman behind him and my DD made a break for it and shot up to the slide like a whippet- popped out the bottom of the slide smack bang into the Mum rescuing her CRYING son...who was being held by my DS. with me firing out the slide a moment after...uncomfortably close behind...touching.

At this point DD looks at the woman and goes "awww" with a little stroke of her arm.

The award for the worst Mother goes to meeee!

Leaving to go to work one morning I reached my hand round the kitchen door to take my umbrella off the door knob, where it always hung. Was striding confidently along the road, swinging my umbrella, but getting odd looks from people. I looked down and saw that I was actually wielding a multi-coloured feather duster that my mum had hung on the same door knob.

Was a bit embarrassing in a yoga (or maybe pilates? Can't remember) class once.

You know those big exercise balls? Well, we were using those. We had to lie on our backs with them between our legs and do crunches of some description.

Weeellllll....let's just say the angle created the perfect opportunity for very loud fanny farts. I literally couldn't do the exercise as it happened EVERY time!

I have blocked the reactions of the other people from my mind!

Mine was when i'd spent an afternoon with a friend and her brat of a child, wrecking my house. When they finally left, i texted my dh to say what a little shit the child was and how glad i was they'd gone........you can probably guess that i actually texted my friend, mother of brat. Doh!

oh ifgrandma that is hilarious!

diamond omg

asterix fail....embarrassing moment?

When I was in my early 20's, wearing a gorgeous new Miss Selfridge 'peasant' skirt that I loved, swirled out of taxi feeling all foxy in front of boyfriend, wind blew half an acre of beloved skirt into taxi, door slams, taxi immediately pulls off.

Massive rip, and I'm standing in the road in my pants. Win.

another weeing one....

1978/9 ish, aged about 8 and at brownie camp.
just been in the 3 legged race with my friend, S.
both desperate for the loo and a bit of a walk back from the field to the centre we were staying in, we hobbled there, still tied together. can't get the knot undone to separate ourselves.
in cubicle getting our shorts and knickers down and argueing over who goes first. BOTH pee ourselves!

I was mortified. The Brown Owls etc thought it was hysterical.

First you do realise someone saw that and made you into an episode of Miranda?

and at least you weren't going commando!

DS had just started school and had gone on his first after-school playdate, with a boy whose family we didn't know at all. DH picked him up and I went into try-hard PFB-mummy mode and attempted to text the other mum to say thanks for having him, except that I somehow managed to press 'call' as well as 'send' and left her a voicemail that consisted of me grilling DS about what her house was like, how big it was, whether it was clean, what she'd fed him.... She never mentioned it!

Ahh! All of your childhood wee ones have made me have horrible shame flashbacks!

I'm not sure how old I was but I was on an overnight trip with brownies so 10 or under I guess.

We'd spent the night telling 'creepy' urban legends about ghosts/murderers in the camp we were staying in. All fun and games until I woke up in the early hours desperately in need of a wee but too scared to go. I lay there for hours and eventually admitted defeat and wee'd the camp bed

I then somehow fell back to sleep. Woke up in the morning to Brown Owl loudly announcing we make our beds for "inspection". I had to spread my decidedly soggy sleeping bag out with a VERY obvious wet patch in front of the whole room and stammered an awkward and implausible explanation about condensation from the nearby window.