Aibu to expect my dh to say "do you mind if ...

[MoanCraft]

I pop out for a run?" instead of coming down in the morning dressed in his gear and go without asking.
His defence is that it's not going to affect my day at all and that we (myself and ds) probably won't even be dressed for the day by the time he comes back. Although this is probably the case, am I bu to want him to just say "do you mind if I pop out for a run?"
Of course I wouldn't mind, but it would just be nice to be asked.

Yanbu. Dh and I always ask each other before running or going for a bike ride.

YABU

I'm with dh- if it isn't inconveniencing you, what does it matter?

I think yabu. If you're not directly affected I don't see why he needs to ask permission to go.

YABU if he is going for a short while.
YANBU if he is going for 3 or 4 hours.

I'd not expect him to ask me but I'd certainly expect him to say something along the lines of "just off for a run darling, be back soon" surely this is normal. He's rude.

i sort of get what you mean and agree to an extent...this thread won't go well though.

Yanbu, it's just common courtesy towards your partner I would think.

I'm with dh- if it isn't inconveniencing you, what does it matter?

Because he doesn't know if it's inconvenient if he doesn't ask.

Common courtesy.

Surely this a reverse or something.

It's doesn't affect you, you don't mind but want him to ask permission?

I go to the gym before early most days. Doesn't affect dh or the kids, so no I won't be asking permission. I stopped asking permission to do stuff, that doesn't impact other people when using became an adult.

Being the default babysitter is annoying. So if he is just assuming you will take up the slack on something he should be sharing then I'd say you were being reasonable. It's something DH and I clash on occasionally.

But your OP does not seem a good example of this

YABVU, he does not need to be asked.
My dp runs a few evenings a week and will just change into his gear and go while dinner is cooking.
I would only expect to be asked if I was ill and felt I couldn't be left alone.

YABU he doesn't need your permisson.

Because it's a Sunday, a family day, and what if I'd thought it would be nice to go out early all together, or what if I didn't feel too well and would like dh to help get ds ready for the day, etc. etc. I could think of many reasons. I think that if you are in a marriage and especially with kids you shouldn't just wake up in the morning and decide what you want to do yourself.

YABU, doesn't sound like it affects your plans as he goes out early. So what's the issue?

Nanny both the OP and the Dhaka already know and agree it doesn't affect her. She wants to be asked, just to be asked. Pointless.

YABU.

I have spare grips, should one be required. All sizes, most colours. No purple though. Had a run on purple.

"Popping out for a run sweetheart" - fine, normal, polite, conversational, expected.

"Do you mind.. etc" - a bit controlling and why does he need to ask permission?

MoanCraft but if he goes out early you can still do all those things?? And if you're not feeling well or whatever isn't it up to you to tell him?

YANBU at all. The huff post article about being the default parent sums up exactly why this is not fair - I assume he would be gobsmacked if you did the same.
Perhaps I am projecting here but I think I get where you are coming from!

Yanbu. I absolutely hate the way some fathers seem to just go about their business as if they had no one to take care of but themselves. Default position: look after meeee. Mother's default position: look after the children.

Agree with Hearts.

Was he doing the London marathon?

When in a healthy relationship of course you discuss/plan things together. YANBU. He's selfish.