to think this conversation shouldn't have happened infront of DS ?

[FujimotosElixir]

Unfortunately i was late picking up ds today, quite late my bus was very late and not the kind of distance I could just sod it and walk. i rang the school in panic knowing i.was already late apologising and would get there asap. When i arrived the head teacher was understandably annoyed but said , where have you been , why are you late? ...i had explained this to the AD , and then went onto say this really was too late and it wasnt a bit late and usually they would ring Ss (!? first offence id rang?) and dont let it happen again , ds was really fed up. generally being quite provocative and rude, my issue isnt the conversation itself more the fact it happened in front of DS? im raging so unprofessional, the reason was out of my control although I understand her annoyance. i apologised several times.i wouldn't have minded a.discreet word or 'we'll speak on monday' but i did ring and it wasn't really my fault. AIBU to be annoyed the conversation was so inappropriately done in front of ds?

Do you have a plan B?

Surely if you rely on buses this could be a regular thing?

yabu.

stopandlook there is a difference between abandoning your child and being late to collect them from school because of the bus

Thing is, waiting for you to turn up could make the school staff late for their own kids. these are the people that look after your child for 30 hours a week at least have the manners to be on time for pick up. I would be going in with a thank you card and bunch of flowers on Monday if I was you. a few more mind and you could have been picking up from the social,services office.

I don't follow how you thought you were 10 minutes late and then realised 35?

If not social services then who should be called when a child is not collected from school?

Sometimes things happen whereby you do everything in your power to get there on time and you have tried but can't get anyone else to collect for you but there is only so long that the school could be reasonably expected to wait though.

I agree though, the conversation shouldn't have happened in front of your DS, they should have a standard letter to give you instead.

I have worked full time for years whilst trying to juggle chaildcare and a DH who often works away.

Tbh I have had very close shaves, I hated meetings that were meant to start at 1400. People would rock up, get a coffee etc and we would start at 1445. An old manager gave me a great tip - dont say why you need to go, when you agree to an afternoon meeting state that you must leave by xx. Dont say why, if the meeting hasnt started at say 2.15 state you are pushed for time and have some conference calls later and can you start now...

The tardy person turning up at 14.30 will have to live with it. At 1700 say start packing up your laptop etc. After all you have warned them.

Using the excuse of a fussing baby is a bit silly. Again, what has this to do with a teacher who has had to mind your child??

no the ht was telling ds was fed up. Thank you oldboots my point entirely ...yy the back up plan i need one really.

Hillingdon you're about as coherant as frank gallagher on crack, but dont let that gwt in the way of posting more ridiculous baiting rubbish.

I had a Plan B. if I knew I was going to be late I would call my old childminder and she would do a pick up. I would have to pay her of course and actually only needed to do it a couple of times over the years.

You seem to be a SAHM with a fussing baby, an inability to work out how late you actually are and cannot drive. Something needs to be addressed here.

Some people really are too quick to jump on people aren't they. Can't wait like little key board warriors to have a pop. RTFT Penelope op did ring the school.
You rang the school and apologised. As a TA said that conversation should not have been had in ear shot of your ds. Now I asume if she's a HT she's not stupid. That could play on a child's mind.
Tbh I think she was a bit or rather exteremerley rude to you. Okay I get she's human but none the less it was very unprofessional all that Where have you been ect ect.
I assume you felt bad enough, you didn't need ht to make you feel worse

Fuji why do you think the conversation shouldn't have taken place in front of your DS? You were late, he would have known you were late. So, why should you not have been spoken to in front of DS?

Posted too soon. people don't turn up late on purpose

I would be more annoyed at my ds being provocative and rude to the HT than I would be for the HT telling me this in front of him.

fuji - there is no need to get arsy with me. Sort out your time managment and perhaps you will be on time from now on.

Although I appreciate this wasn't your fault this time, I have to admit, late collection drives me crazy at my school.
When parents are late collecting their children, I don't get to do my paper work. Due to the amount of parents who are late,this meant that this Easter holiday I spent one whole unpaid day completing work at home.
Also, when parents are late, it means I'm late leaving to collect my children.Unfortunately for me when I'm late,through no fault of my own, I then have to pay for extra childcare!
You can see why I get pissed off, I lose time with my own children and it costs me money.

She was entitled to really tick you off, because school is not supposed to be your emergency late childcare.

BUT she was VERY unreasonable to threaten you with SS for a first offence - that bogeyman could have terrified your DS far more than anything else, thinking he could be taken away from you by strangers.
She should have briefly said you'll receive an official warning from the school by post, which would detail their policy if it happens again.
SS are too busy unless it happens a few times.

You definitely need to track time and organise yourself a lot better.
Do you have a relative / friend / another parent to take your DC, if this happens again ?
If not, you probably need to take the earlier bus and accept you are going to waste time waiting at the school for your DC. Better than wasting the staff's time

The conversation shouldn't happen in front of ds because it portrays social services as something scary, which they shouldn't be for a child. Teachers should be teaching that social workers are (like police officers and fire fighters) people that help us not people to avoid - whatever we as adults may feel about them.

I didn't know teachers finished work at 3.30, most of ours seem to be there till later and the school office shuts at 5. There is normally some activity going on in the school, after school clubs, karate ICT, board games club and arts and crafts, when iv'e collected kids i normally see some of the teachers and the head's there till 5. When i got my DD she was sitting in the office helping the receptionist with teachers in the hall and reception, i thought they all finished at 5.

Hillingdon you're just posting baiting shit on the fact im a SAHM youve done it twice i was late because of the bus not because of a fussing baby , its been well established you are literally posting shit to provoke lazy sahm stereotypes, if you're in an antagonising mood take it elsewhere the adults are talking.

How was the HT being "provocative and rude" when she told you your child had been fed up waiting when you rocked up 35 minutes late?
How did the the fed upness manifest itself, exactly? He could have been a royal pain in the arse.

I'm confused about the order of events. When you phoned the school, were you already 10 minutes late?

Oh this drives me nuts.

I have to get straight off after school to pick my own child up from the childminder. I get a lecture from her if I'm late!

I wouldn't think anything of having words with the late parent in front of the child. It's not like you're ranting at them, but a "you're late" type of chat I think is fine.

It happens, but that doesn't mean it's not really annoying when it does.

she said hes been fed up in a sympathetic, way.

Why was that unprofessional op?