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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Selfishness with buggies on public transport

135 replies

CarryOnCramping · 17/04/2015 08:09

I know we love these threads.

Yesterday DS and I had to use various modes of public transport. We got on a tram at lunchtime at a quite busy time and had to stand up. DS is 3 and generally a bit wobbly if he has to stand up on moving vehicles so not ideal but not the end of the world.

One woman was sat in a section of 4 seats, so two facing another two, with her buggy stuck in the leg room bit. So nobody else could have got in to sit down. Apparently completely unaware that the tram was packed and their were elderly/pregnant people that would probably have liked a seat.

We got on a train at rush hour (in London) and another woman sat on an outside seat had her buggy next to her in the aisle. So when anybody got on if they wanted to go and get a seat they had to take their bags off and squeeze past in the tiny gap left. She'd make a half arsed attempted at pulling the buggy towards her and say 'oh sorry' but didn't actually think to move her buggy?

AIBU to be dumbfounded at this kind of behaviour? How are people so oblivious? I remember when my PFB was tiny and how stressful I found public transport and I probably even made some silly awkward decisions some times but never to that extent? Is this a thing now or did I just witness two selfish people in a short space of time?

OP posts:
chocolateyay · 17/04/2015 08:13

Ah well, people, eh? Aisle seat hoggers, bag seats, fit folk on the priority seats... You have to just ask them to move, or they just pretend not to see you.

Snozberry · 17/04/2015 08:15

They were being selfish, buggy in the seats ffs??

But, there is no buggy space on a train. Fold it and put it in the luggage bit, people with huge suitcases fling it to the floor. Leave it up and stand by the doors you are in the way of people getting on. I usually end up in the bike area next to the loos, until someone with a bike gets on or the trolley wants to get past.

Original poster
CarryOnCramping · 17/04/2015 08:17

Yes it's true there's no designated area for buggies on trains and that's shit. But I always just stood with it in the area by the doors and didn't have any problems.

OP posts:
flagnogbagnog · 17/04/2015 08:21

Taking a buggy on public transport is a nightmare. Trying to get off a train in the short amount of time that you get at stops, whilst holding on to a baby or toddler, and lifting a folded pram, whilst trying to negotiate people pushing past you in every direction is just awful! It seems that nobody makes allowances for you. I don't blame them for not folding the pram down and fitting in where ever they can.

Morelikeguidelines · 17/04/2015 08:46

Hi carryon. Just giving you a wave as guessing from mention of tram in/near London you live near me.

Have always found there is lots of room.for buggies on trams and so no need to put between the seats. Mad but someone should have asked her - she may have stupidly thought this was more out of the way than putting buggy in the standing area.

I generally find Croydon people are pretty considerate on trams either with buggies or without. People don't always move right down when tram is packed but i may sure to tell them (I travel alone at rush hours and with buggy and/or school child at other times. I never dare to take buggy on the bus though.

Original poster
CarryOnCramping · 17/04/2015 09:08

Wave Morelike yes we are in Croydon Grin

OP posts:
Chuckitinthefuckitbucket · 17/04/2015 09:11

I hate having to take a buggy on buses for this reason. They are bloody awkward. I'm actually looking for a small buggy at the moment so I don't feel such a unwanted nuisance when getting the bus. My dd is 2, and won't for anything sit in a seat still- this would enable me I fold the buggy up and tuck it away.
The other day I got on the bus and this man just sat there staring at me in the middle of the 3 disabled seats (he wasn't elderly or disabled) if he could have just moved up 1 seat I could have fit the buggy on and stood up, but oh no, he wasn't moving, even when asked just starred at me Hmm
Whenever I go on public transport my buggy takes up 2 seats and I stand, that way me and dd aren't taking up any more seats than we would if we were sat down.

chocolateyay · 17/04/2015 09:37

I took ds on the bus in his pram twice. I couldn't bear it (plus you needed a degree in engineering to fold it). Tubes were just about doable but needed good planning (timing and which stations had decent access). I just slung him most of the time.

There was a standoff on the bus yesterday between scary mom with buggy and equally scary drunk homeless guy with a trolley of plastic bags. He put his trolley in the wheelchair bit diagonally and didn't want to move it.
She ended up leaving her buggy across the aisle, blocking the rest of the bus.

SaucyJack · 17/04/2015 09:42

Dumbfounded? Really?

Our local buses have designated spaces for wheelchairs AND buggies. I luffs it.

I try to be considerate when taking the pram on public transport..... but equally I refuse to cower in the corner apologising for my existence either.

Original poster
CarryOnCramping · 17/04/2015 12:27

Saucy dumbfounded, yes Hmm

I'm not expecting anybody to cower in a corner apologising for their existence, just use common sense. I don't drive so I managed on public transport when I had a buggy. There are spaces on buses and trams for buggies. Fair enough trains aren't so accommodating but most people seem to manage without blocking a whole aisle/4 seats.

OP posts:
MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 12:34

I don't really know trams (despite the act i used to live in Croydon), so can i ask was there a better place for the buggy to be? I often block seats with the buggy on some trains as the alternative is blocking the entire aisle and being in everyones way. Better numerous people can get on, move about and have space to stand rather than 4 people get a seat imo.

ilovesooty · 17/04/2015 13:45

Chuckit you don't know he didn't have a disability.

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 17/04/2015 13:56

I purposely bought a pushchair with a one handed fold down mechanism so I could do just that if I had to use public transport. Baby in one hand, pushchair in the other, on the bus we got. And if I was super lucky someone usually gave up their seat so we could seat down too.

It doesn't have to be a ballache.

MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 14:01

It does if you have 2 children and bags.

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 17/04/2015 14:07

Yep done that as well.

MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 14:13

You must be a better person than me then because there is no way i could lift out and hold a squirming 36lb 2.7 year old, a dead weight 25lb 7mo, numerous shopping bags and disassemble the buggy. The footprint of all the stuff on the floor would be the same as having the buggy up anyway so it would be pointless.

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 17/04/2015 14:15

You have to use your noggin when you use public transport. I always avoided it during the rush hour with a buggy. I always folded the buggy down and made sure if I had bags with me they weren't heavy.

Never had any problems.

Until I decided to one day to not fold up the buggy and got on a half empty bus another passenger had a go at me for wanting to sit beside dd2. She wanted to sit in that seat and I should have have gone at sat at the back - according to her.

She got told to get to Fuck!

Ilovenannyplum · 17/04/2015 14:20

I got told off earlier by a grumpy lady on the bus. I had parked the pram (it doesn't fold and DS is only 8 months old so too young to get out) in the area designated for wheelchairs or prams. The bus was busy and she was struggling to get
her wheeley trolley on. She demanded that I moved my pram round the other way so she could get her trolley next to it. Explained to her very politely that I couldn't as it would stick out into the aisle and block everyone else's way. Oh deary that was not the answer she wanted, lots of eye rolling and huffing.

I do try my hardest not to get in anybody's way and take up the least amount of space possible but there was literally no way I could have moved to accommodate Mrs Grumpy earlier

GlitzAndGigglesx · 17/04/2015 14:24

I'm dreading trying to get on public transport with a double! Many buggies are unnecessarily huge too

MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 14:25

The reason i bought such a large unfoldable buggy was because i don't drive and i knew public transport would be a nightmare, so it would just be easier to walk everywhere. The buggy has large off road type wheels and a huge bag compartment for my shopping. All this is great. But then there are the odd occasions when i need to go on the train and i need to use my buggy.

MrsItsNoworNotatAll · 17/04/2015 14:26

And unfortunately they're folk that will sit in the area designed for buggies or wheelchairs and won't budge if either wants to use that space.

Or they make a huge song and dance about it if they do.

Pathetic!

MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 14:43

I hate the piccadilly line where there are fold down seats or that bum resty thing in the luggage/buggy area. People race in front of me to get there and sit/perch. I then say excuse me this is for the luggage/buggy and the seats are only if no one needs it. But they think i should completely block the doors and everyone else just so they can sit down. (oddly i have notice it is foreign exchange type students in groups that have done this the most the tutting and eye rolling is pure Am Dram gold)

Ilovenannyplum · 17/04/2015 14:57

I find that some people leave any manners at ground level and proceed to act like idiots whilst using the tube. Really annoys me Hmm

Mintyy · 17/04/2015 15:01

Ilovenannyplum - are you saying that your puschair takes up so much space that a shopping trolley couldn't share it with you? On London buses at least, they are designed to accommodate a wheelchair or two pushchairs.

MrsKoala · 17/04/2015 15:06

My buggy would probably take up the whole space on a bus Mintyy. It's a double with one seat in front of the other and is very long. I would have to put it long ways over the spaces as pushing it in sideways would mean it would block the whole aisle. i don't use buses tho so i can't be sure.

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