To think children should give up their seats for adults

[BeeInYourBonnet]

And their parents should encourage them to.

Especially when they are young enough to sit on their parents laps.

Another one? YABU.

When DS was young, I would happily have given up his seat to an adult - if there were no seats available. Sitting on my lap is not a problem.

But that's me. I am sure there are plenty of reasons why people might not want to do that - especially if it's a long duration.

Swimming lessons yesterday. About 15 chairs in viewing area. About 15 adults about 15DCs. Approx 5 adults sat down with about 10 DCs. 5 DCs sat down on floor/playing. 10 adults standing for an hour. DCs all aged between 4-10. All seated DCs on ipads or similar.

I just think the DCs should have given up seats. It's how I've been raised I guess. And DH . He sometimes automatically just sits on the living room floor at his parents at big family gatherings, it's so ingrained!

"children should respect their elders and betters. And giving up one's seat to an adult is a way of doing that" what a load of tosh, TywysogesGymraeg what makes an adult automatically the better of a child? I'd always give up my seat for someone who looked as though they were struggling with standing and my DC would do the same but they have as much right to a seat as an able-bodied adult.

It's not about adults being better. My DCs sit on the floor all the time, even when there are perfectly good seats nearby. They don't care either way. If I sat cross legged on floor I'd never get up again.

Out of interest, if you were with your DH and there was only one seat, who would sit on it?

Because I'm old fashioned enough to think that children should respect their elders and betters. And giving up one's seat to an adult is a way of doing that.
OBVIOUSLY, there are exceptions for sick or infirm children etc, but we're talking about a general principle.

You are assuming, of course, that you can tell by looking whether the child whose seat you covet, or their parent whose lap you wish they would sit in, is capable of same.

If the seating is first come first served, then get their earlier.

Now, childrens towels flung over an empty seat so they can come and go while those who want to sit (of any age) cannot is not acceptable.

The adults in a pub equivalent, tablesfull of smokers coming back and forth, with half the seats empty at any time, while those who want to actually sit and stay in the seat are left standing around a too small bar height table, is just as selfish. I dont demand someone who is sitting to give up their seat, I do expect those who have a seat to actually sit on it!

I think it's common (or perhaps uncommon now) courtesy for a child to stand for an adult (with obvious exceptions). This isn't anti-child.

Also, bring young doesn't make them a lesser human, less worthy of sitting. I think this is a bit OTT. Mitigating circumstances (disability, paid-for seats, unsteady little ones on public transport &c.) aside, asking your child to give up their seat is, IMO, a nice way to start making them aware of – and respect – others around them.

It's not the same as telling another adult what to do, which is how I think some pp view it. We make children do things they might not like all the time (go to school! Eat aubergine! And keep their mouths closed while they're doing it) but there's always a reason – one which a child might not appreciate until they're older.

My Grampy used to encouraged me to offer my seat to elderly people on the bus. I used to feel ever so grown up doing so.

But for any and all adults? No, YABU.

I just think the DCs should have given up seats. It's how I've been raised I guess. And DH . He sometimes automatically just sits on the living room floor at his parents at big family gatherings, it's so ingrained!

If it was at a OAP heavy place, would you expect all the younger generation [ie your age] to sit on the floor? Or would you be happy standing?

If it is an issue get there earlier and bag yourself a seat.

Couldn't make ours sit on the floor(they'd get in everyone's way really tall,really long legs and massive sized adult feet all 5 of them)or sit on our laps.They're all giants,I'm 5 foot 5 and our youngest is nearly as tall as me and she's only 7.

Children have as much right to sit on a chair as an adult and there are plenty of adults who can sit on the floor, me included in that.

Because I'm old fashioned enough to think that children should respect their elders and betters

BETTERS? How are older people 'better' than younger people. I have seen some adults behave far worse than my 6yr old...doesn't make them better just because they have a few years on her!

To answer your q about whether DH or I would stand if we were together and only one seat, it would depend whose need was greater. My need would have to be pretty significant to trump DH tho.

If any of them sat on mine or DH lap some one would call the Police they'd think we being purposely squished by someone

BeeInYourBonnet it was a previous poster who referred to 'elders and betters'. If I was somewhere with one seat and I was with DH I wouldn't automatically expect that seat because I'm a woman. Sitting on a sticky dirty floor is grim, I wouldn't expect anyone to do that but you've got the option to stand unless health issues preclude this in which case I'd said before I'd give up my seat without hesitation.

YA definitely NBU.

Just another example of the entitlement that kids expect and some silly adults encourage.

Are you disabled then OP? Or 95? I'm in my forties and can happily sit cross legged on the floor-and get up again. Maybe you should work on your fitness.

My DH would always offer me the only seat. But I might not take it, if I didn't need it. However I have bad knees and DH is pretty fit, so often I will accept the offer.

How is it entitlement bananayellow? If anything it's entitlement for an adult to expect that they can arrive somewhere after other people and can take a seat off a child who is already sitting there.

I always encouraged my children to stand up for those less able to stand.
Not because those people were their 'elders and betters' but because it is the right thing to do. I hope I do not sound all sanctimonious about it like some people. 'Less able to stand' could be any age.

Christ on a bike - do we do this thread once a week now on MN?? And it's such a stupid, goady topic.

I would rather my DC sat on a chair while playing on their iPad rather than lolling on the floor, if you would like a chair you should have got there earlier.

As for children giving up chairs for their 'betters'... as soon as I see someone I think is 'better' than them, I will encourage them to move. (I don't think anyone is 'better' than them though so they may be seated for quite a while.)

sunny less able to stand then of course the child should give up their seat. but they shouldn't be made to stand just because an adult with a sense of entitlement wants that seat
which is what the OP and a PP are saying.

Depends on age, situation etc.