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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To wonder why parents let their children go out dressed inappropriately

311 replies

Twoplus3 · 10/04/2015 17:36

Now I know the weather is warning up, and you expect to see chidkren in shorts, t shirts, skirts etc etc but why oh why do parents allow children, I'm talking Young children age 8-9-10 go out dressed in belly tops and shorts that are that short they are exposing some of their bum? It really grates me as surely young girls should not be going round dressed like this, it's inapropriate imo and I wouldn't dream of letting my own daughter walk round in such a state.

OP posts:
ditavonteesed · 10/04/2015 18:31

and when my 11yo dd wears a belly top I just look at her and think where are heer internal organs,, her stamach is concave, I would have my beely out if it looked like that.

Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2015 18:31

I agree about the tops which are deliberately 'adult' - padded tops, thongs and the like. But wee shorts are surely fine.

Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2015 18:32

I know what you mean dita! I reckon some kids must have to wear their innards in backpacks they are so weeny

SurlyCue · 10/04/2015 18:32

Trust me my 13 year old dd would not allow me to "foist" my choice of clothes on her

So its pure luck (for you) that she hasnt (yet) chosen clothes you disapprove of. What happens when she does? According to you she will have her own way and so will wear them- people might judge you! Shock or will you put them in the bin?

MangoJuggler · 10/04/2015 18:32

Passme you were indeed being very nice and I for one am hanging head for ignoring missing your post

ghostyslovesheep · 10/04/2015 18:33
Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2015 18:34

My huffing was aimed at op but I won't refuse!

MangoJuggler · 10/04/2015 18:34

(Not crudities, that would be fucking rude)

mumofthemonsters808 · 10/04/2015 18:36

I've never actually seen any child wearing shorts with their bum hanging out.

Alexandpea · 10/04/2015 18:42

I think the OP is getting a very hard time here from some insufferably smug posters. I agree that crop tops and tight hotpants on young children look inappropriate (sexulised and tawdry).

Possibly more explicable in 30° heat, but at the current 20° - what possible justification could there be? Why would any parent encourage their young child to strut their stuff? Horrible to see.

5madthings · 10/04/2015 18:44

Thing is this judging of young girls and their clothing is partly what leads to victim blaming isn't it? Inappropriate, sensual, showing too much flesh.... Equals she is asking for it...

And it's always women and girls being judged on their appearance, being told what they can and can't wear. Starting them young in teaching them it's their appearance that matters and that they will be judged for how they look. You are female your worth is only in your body....

If I am honest I am picky to a degree with what my kids wear, I like colourful, practical clothes for them. As they have got older they have chosen more themselves, I may grin at their choices and combinations and love of dress up etc. But they are the ones wearing it and as long as it's practical it's fine. I don't ascribe judgement to people on their clothing, especially not on a child ffs.

TheFairyCaravan · 10/04/2015 18:44

OP's DC's ages are not the same on this thread as they are on other threads is all I'm saying!

MangoJuggler · 10/04/2015 18:45

What does strut their stuff mean? Like moggels down a catwalk?

MangoJuggler · 10/04/2015 18:46

Ooh er FairyCaravan. AS is a handy tool eh.

5madthings · 10/04/2015 18:46

And there we go "strut their stuff" ffs who looks at a child and thinks shit like that?

Sparklingbrook · 10/04/2015 18:47

Mango, it's like what Dave off Money supermarket does.

dingit · 10/04/2015 18:47

I'm going to go against the cheesecake munchers and tea slurpers too. I can see where the op is coming from, and some people are being a bit unkind.
I have a 16 year old dd, and I sometimes have to bite my lip when she goes out in shorts that just about cover her arse and a belly top. She is comfortable like that and thinks she looks good, but of course it draws attention to her. Would I let her walk through town alone at night like that? Not a chance.
And would I let her dress like that at 9? No way.

Sparklingbrook · 10/04/2015 18:48

'Cheesecake munchers'=personal attack surely?

SurlyCue · 10/04/2015 18:49

but at the current 20° - what possible justification could there be?

Because they want to? Confused any clothes i wear are because i want to wear them, i didnt realise there was any other criteria to meet.

Also, how does children wearing a cropped top equate to them "strutting their stuff" (like yer man of the moneysupermarket ad?)

TheFairyCaravan · 10/04/2015 18:50

It is Mango.

"Strutting their stuff" Hmm

Oh, FFS! Kids just walk about don't they?

Passmethecrisps · 10/04/2015 18:50

Not sure children have stuff to strut

TheFairyCaravan · 10/04/2015 18:51

I had a 99 off the ice cream van but DS2 had the flake. I've had no cheesecake!

dingit · 10/04/2015 18:53

Was tea slurper ok then sparkling? Wink

ninetynineonehundred · 10/04/2015 18:54

I was genuinely embarrassed to be seen out with Dd2(16 mths) last week.

Striped tights
Blue wellies with rocket ships
Really bad patterned shorts
Purple tartan patterned coat.

As for why Iet her go out like that. One word...
Grandma.

Sparklingbrook · 10/04/2015 18:55

I think 'tea slurper' might just be within Talk Guidelines, and I was drinking pop dingit. Grin