Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think if you take champagne to a family dinner

179 replies

namechangedincase23 · 05/04/2015 18:38

It should be opened?

Just that really. Took a bottle of naice champers to family dinner at Dsis house. Umm and ahhed about it as was thinking of saving it for our wedding anniversay.

Champagne was put in fridge and did not re-appear despite suggesting we open it and have a toast.

AIBU to think it should have been opened, especially as it was presented with "I brought some fizz so we could toast Easter together" and there was no grey area around it being a gift?

OP posts:
Maliceaforethought · 05/04/2015 20:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FeijoaSundae · 05/04/2015 20:06

And I have to say, the circles I move in, wine is undoubtedly brought to share at the event.

Dinner parties pre-DC were raucous affairs, where every last drop was drunk, and the table cleared for a dance floor at 3AM. Post-DC, dinner parties don't happen anywhere near frequently enough, so are raucous affairs, whereby we wring as much enjoyment out of them as we possibly can, and drink every last drop. Everyone understands this. Wink

keepsmiling2015 · 05/04/2015 20:13

I think they should have opened it. How annoying!

intlmanofmystery · 05/04/2015 20:14

I have a cousin like this - after years of seeing nice (IMO) wine and occasionally fizz squirrelled away in favour of the crap wine they wanted to serve, I just stopped bringing anything to drink whenever I saw them. Even many years later I still think she is just tight fisted, liked what was brought and simply wanted to keep for herself. This was family not a formal evening and it was explicitly meant to be shared. Don't bother next time.

RemusLupinsBiggestGroupie · 05/04/2015 20:14

I like Lambrini - much nicer than Champagne to my clearly v uncultured palette.

AnnieMoor · 05/04/2015 20:18

It depends.

If lunch was ready, you wouldn't drink champagne with it.

If you were having drinks/canapés then champagne would be appropriate.

Original poster
namechangedincase23 · 05/04/2015 20:21

We were there an hour before lunch was served :(

OP posts:
bonbonbonbon · 05/04/2015 20:22

In this situation I agree with CalicoBlue. I'd have either opened it myself and served it, or if no one wanted aby, I'd have taken it home. I'd only do that with family or very close friends though, otherwise I'd consider it a hostess gift and therefore up to the hostess when to serve it.

Trills · 05/04/2015 20:31

If lunch was ready, you wouldn't drink champagne with it.

I would.

Tobyjugg · 05/04/2015 20:37

I would have said that since it's not been drunk, I'm taking it home.

Original poster
namechangedincase23 · 05/04/2015 20:38

I'm with Trills. I'd drink it for breakfast. (though as said, there was loads of time before lunch)

As Madame Bollinger said "I drink it when I'm happy and when I'm sad. Sometimes, I drink it when I'm alone. When I have company I consider it obligatory. I trifle with it if I'm not hungry and drink it if I am; Otherwise I never touch it - unless I'm thirsty."

I just don't have the unlimited access she enjoyed :)

OP posts:
Tobyjugg · 05/04/2015 20:38

If lunch was ready, you wouldn't drink champagne with it.

Never read such rubbish. I've drunk champagne with breakfast before now.

kelda · 05/04/2015 20:41

Yabu.

If I am serving a dinner, I have wine etc ready for the meal, and any that we are given I assume to be a gift and don't necessarily open it.

If it was a special bottle to you, you should have kept it.

CaTsMaMmA · 05/04/2015 20:42

wouldn't drink it with lunch

champagne is the most multipurpose beverage...goes with all the things.

except Easter, according to the OP's sister.

Pomegranatemolasses · 05/04/2015 20:47

I can't believe some posters are still trotting out the "I'd assume it was a gift" line, when the op has clearly said that she told her sister she brought it to be drunk at the lunch.

There was no ambiguity - op yanbu, and I fel annoyed on your behalf!

Yellowbird54321 · 05/04/2015 20:49

YANBU - of course your sis should have opened it pronto (pre lunch) with a cheery announcement of how lovely it was and then you could have shared and enjoyed it as intended.
That said, as that's not what actually happened, I'm afraid I would feel that the moment has passed so would not be asking for the bottle back, or for it to be saved. (I would hope sis would decide to save it for the next occasion, but I guess that's up to her)

CPtart · 05/04/2015 20:57

YANBU. And if you are really as close a family as you say, you would have felt able to say something surely?

DragonWithAGirlTattoo · 05/04/2015 20:58

"I brought some fizz so we could toast Easter together" and there was no grey area around it being a gift?"

should have been drunk - any reply yet?

Pomegranatemolasses · 05/04/2015 21:00

Well it's pretty infuriating to realise that you have just handed your sister your hard won bottle of fizz, so thst she can enjoy it whenever she likes!

Does she have form for this sort of thing - ie the slightly jaw-dropping (mn fav) 'entitled' behaviour?

Only1scoop · 05/04/2015 21:02

Did she not say she would save it for your aniversary though?

Is that soon?

I don't think I'd mention it again

Weebirdie · 05/04/2015 21:03

It was seen as a gift even though you didn't say it was a gift and unfortunately your sister didn't feel like sharing it.

alittleegglayonaleaf · 05/04/2015 21:04

Yanbu, definitely not. My dm brought champagne to my FIL house when dd1 was born to toast the birth, which she made very clear, and my FIL said ooh nice and put it in the wine cellar Easter Confused Very selfish and mean man

Dancingqueen17 · 05/04/2015 21:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AbneyorTeal · 05/04/2015 21:12

I'd have been gutted, I love a glass of fizz. Although vintage champagne can be a bit too dry for me. And I would definitely drink it with a meal. Prosecco is my usual weekend drink of choice. I keep buying too many crappy bottles of wine for about the same price as a nice, drinkable bottle of Prosecco.

Pomegranatemolasses · 05/04/2015 21:22

Well, it was good that you sent the text, stops the festering resentment Grin.

Now you know that she knows, even if she doesn't respond to the text.

Years ago, when my pfb was born, I had a champagne trauma of my own. Someone had given us a lovely botle of fizz when I was pregnant, and we had planned to open it and celebrate the birth (at some point when I had got over the horror of the birth and adjusted to being a mother).

The morning after ds was born, dh popped into the hospital and cheerily announced that he, his pal and pal's girlfriend had drunk the champagne the night before as 'they just sort of felt like it'. Angry

It honestly took me about five years to get past the simmering rage that I felt every time I thought about it. Obviously I was slightly overinvested in the symbolism of opening the champagne as new parents to our pfb Blush. And it does seem a teeny bit ridiculous to me now.

Still though, I definitely feel your pain!