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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To Kick Her Out Of My House Immediately?

967 replies

Lilylonglegs · 03/04/2015 12:04

I have the Houseguest from hell.

I was told before she arrived that she was coming for 2 weeks spending a week with another friend and a week with me. I have an 8 month old baby and she has a ten year old son and is pregnant with dc number 2. A day after she arrived she called to say that she has to leave her friend's house as her friend is going on holiday the next day. I thought this was odd as how can you come from a different country to visit someone and they tell you after you have got there that they are going away?

Nevertheless I told her that I wouldn't be around at that time as I hadn't expected her until 5 days later. She u ummmd and Ahhhhed saying that a hotel was too expensive and that she might as well go back to Sweden where she lives. I agreed with her although in the end she booked a hotel and ended up coming to mine a day sooner than arranged which I really was not too pleased with but is better than coming the 5 days earlier.

When she arrived my DC was with her grandmother so I took them out to a restaurant and invited another friend. We had a really good time. The trouble started the next day. She complained that my house was too small, my toilet is too small, there is no room in there for her to change comfortably, my sofa bed is too small and uncomfortable. I don't have any food containers, she doesn't like the type of food I have. The shops in my area don't sell the type of food she likes. I should have shave my daughters hair off to make it grow. My daughter would walk if she was surrounded by more children as her child walked at 7 months, why don't I feed my child salty pasta and on and on and on.

My daughter has a mild cold and she wants me traipsing around with them, even though I have told her my child is my priority and not her. I probably would have made more effort before her inconsiderate ungrateful behaviour.

Now where it gets worse is that she is saying that she doesn't want to go back to Sweden but wants to live in UK permanently. She is meant to leave in a week but claims money is coming to her account from the father of her unborn DC the day before she is due to leave, which she will use to source an apartment.

The problem is how will she find and move into a place in a week and who will rent a room to a single pregnant mother and child? She can't afford anything more than a room. My fear is that she is trying not to leave my house. She says her friend who went on holiday will let her stay for a few months until she finds her feet, but that friend is not due back for another 3 weeks. I've asked her repeatedly where she will go until her friend comes back as she is leaving mine in a week and she just keeps saying "it will work out" oh and I forgot she has already asked me to lend her £300 when she knows that I am only on maternity pay.

Would I be Unreasonable to just tell her to leave now as I don't think I can take much more of this!

OP posts:
Lilylonglegs · 07/04/2015 00:43

To be fair I thought they would keep her In. This is what they do when it is busy and there are not enough staff they keep you in until a bed is available. I have not seen any evidence of any nosebleed. Not sure what all this is about but happy to have a night free of her. We left her in the afternoon at a and e and went for a pub dinner (yes I like pub grub)

To clear things up. She is Ghanaian met her husband in ghana, had the baby there and then they moved to Italy later. She is now an Italian national. Husband is Italian. Boyfriend is Nigerian and lives in Italy and has a wife and many concubines with children that live in various countries. She moved to Switzerland for three months after boyfriends wife turned up. In Switzerland she stayed with a Kenyan friend who has children with a Swiss guy. Claims that the woman was an alcoholic whose children were now living with their father as a result of her alcoholism. She said she did not know about the alcoholism or that the kids were gone until she got there.

Now where it gets weird is that the alcoholic apparently tried to pimp her out. I just don't know if I can believe this part of the story. She said she was paying 1000 Swiss francs rent a month, but the woman brought a guy that "liked her" to the house and that wold help her put money towards rent. She was so offended and disgusted that she packed up and left".

The Canadian guy was born there but of Ghanaian parentage.

She recieves an allowance from the boyfriend of just over 1000 euros a month and the Canadian sometimes sends money although he appears to be working a minimum wage job and lives with his parents.

OP posts:
Lilylonglegs · 07/04/2015 00:45

She said she is getting chest pains too. It sounded like heartburn but they are going to do an x ray.

OP posts:
Bazza2 · 07/04/2015 00:45

I know that brandy goes beautifully with Lemsip, so I'd recommend some sort of rum with saline. Or gin, if you need to hide it a bit better.

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 07/04/2015 00:46

We could find out.

Bettercallsaul1 · 07/04/2015 00:47

Now where it gets weird.... Grin Grin Grin

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 07/04/2015 00:54

This thread is like a spot that keeps on popping.

Lilylonglegs · 07/04/2015 00:55

The abortion is still going ahead when and if the money comes in. Although it was only decided this week she said there is no way she can keep it because she will hate the baby. When I asked why she would not go into specifics except to that the boyfriend has treated her very badly and done Unforgiveable things which leads me to believe there is more to the story surrounding the boyfriend. I think something major happened when the wife turned up but not sure what.

The other thing is they are carrying one medium suitcase between them with not a lot of clothes in it. I am thinking maybe the wife threw out all their stuff.

OP posts:
Lweji · 07/04/2015 00:55

Red green alien flags.

giraffesCantBunnyHop · 07/04/2015 00:59

Must be bad if xraying her while preg

TaliZorahVasNormandy · 07/04/2015 01:02

I had to have an X Ray while pregnant because they thought I had a blood clot on my lung.

Bettercallsaul1 · 07/04/2015 01:05

OP, your paragraph beginning: To clear things up is a work of comic genius. Grin

mathanxiety · 07/04/2015 01:33

Has it dawned on you yet that she is a prostitute?

GammaDelta · 07/04/2015 01:46

i have tried hard to keep track of this. ... futile attemptConfused Confused Confused ... i need lots ofWine Wine Wine

Bettercallsaul1 · 07/04/2015 01:48

This is a picaresque tale worthy of Charles Dickens!

Bettercallsaul1 · 07/04/2015 01:58

All of life is here: lone mothers, put-upon friends, shady pecuniary dealings, sudden illness, menacing boyfriends, world travel, alcoholism, prostitution...! What is there left? Grin

BringMeTea · 07/04/2015 05:01

Is this like the thread with the wife who knocked on the unknowing gf's front door looking for a dog, and there was a Booths?

Yarp · 07/04/2015 05:34

Have only read the First and last pages

Is she from SWEDEN (first page) or SWITZERLAND (last page)?

KatieKaye · 07/04/2015 05:39

I was wondering the same thing, Math!

Missymum6 · 07/04/2015 05:45

I thought the nosebleed thing was a joke at first.... I personally think she has gone somewhere else! What kind of hospital keeps you over night for a nose bleed? I can't drink along with you lady's as I'm pregnant Sad is it wrong that this thread is the most exciting thing in my life at the moment GrinGrin

Yarp · 07/04/2015 05:52

Right, have now scanned thread

The Sweden thing was to obscure some details incase the houseguest read the thread.

phew!
Makes perfect sense now

Missymum6 · 07/04/2015 06:01

Yarp, I reread the thread And still don't understand! Confused

ordinarybloke · 07/04/2015 06:25

Firstly, OP you seem to be a nice,caaring person for putting up with the shenanigans of this poor excuse of a parent who goes from one unsuitable man to another wihhout putting the needs of her own DC first.

I hope when you return to the she is still there.if she has done a runner,then contact SS/Childrens' Sevices to get them to look after the DC.

If she is still there and she needs to stay-in hospital,then find out how long she will need to stay-in for.if you are willing anr able to look after ber DC for that length of time, then fine otherwise tell her you cannot do so and that she eihthe contacts the father of the DC immediately to come and collect him or tell her that you will contact SS/Childrens' Services to come and look aafter him-and do that!

If she is in A&E ready to come home,then find out when the schools go back in Italy. Tell her that she has to leave the day before and contact 101 for advice. And do throw her out the day before the schools go back.

And to those on this thread treating this as some sort of joke-you should be ashamed of yourselves. The OP is obviously finding this stressful,she has her own young DC and think about the poor 10 year old. I hope if you ever come on here needing some advice,that people react in a more sensible way.

KoalaDownUnder · 07/04/2015 06:34

So...you visited her in hospital? Where she was admitted to a ward, with a nosebleed??

I AM SO CONFUSED.

WhereTheFuckIsMyFuckingCoat · 07/04/2015 07:08

Wow! I have just read this entire thread. Wtf???!!

I can barely keep up! Confused

KatieKaye · 07/04/2015 07:20

If OP was finding this so stressful she would have done as oer the thread title and shown the sponger the door on Friday. Yet here she is, on Tuesday no furthe forward but having added in a whole lot of unbelievable detail which makes the female clock lodger even more unpalatable

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