DH putting his image before baby's comfort

[unodostres]

I know this isn't really a big deal, but I want to figure out if IABU to be a bit annoyed at DH or is it just pg hormones?
PFB due imminently and we hadn't got a sling. I'd read loads of reviews and really wanted to get an Amawrap as it sounds great to use and comfortable and comforting for baby.
However, yesterday DH said he'd point blank refuse to carry baby in a wrap style sling because it's not "manly" enough and would only be seen wearing baby in a black, rucksack style carrier with straps etc. (Wasn't even joking one bit!)
So I ordered a Baby Bjorn and didn't mind at the time but now feel and as I've read reviews and looked at pics and just don't think it sounds or looks as comfy for baby, and we can't afford to buy a wrap style sling as well so that's it now. And I'm partly annoyed at myself for agreeing to the Bjorn when actually DH works so much I'll be the one carrying baby anyway.
AIBU to think that DH is actually a bit childish?

I tried all sorts of wrap slings and hated them. Loved the babybjorn though.

Dp got on well with the bjorn and dd always seemed happy in it. I can kind of see where he's coming from.

Dh hates slings he worries about the saftey. He wasn't comfortable so didn't force him. He was more than happy pushing the pram. I used ring sling during the week.

Return the Babybjorn and go to your local sling library and try some things out. Take DH with you if you can.

Not everyone likes what they expect to like. I have run a library quite a while - I get people who are adamant they want buckles who try them, try a wrap and prefer the wrap….other people who are adamant they want wraps but end up preferring buckles etc.

Get the one you want if you expect to be the one wearing it. Get it in a non-feminine fabric, maybe he will wear it.

Or maybe he will just carry the baby in his arms.
Or carry the heavy infant car seat during the newborn stage.
Or use the push chair.
Or get a Baby bjorn later.
Maybe the baby wont take to being strapled to you always.
Maybe you won't take to it.

Yes, he sounds insecure saying such things, but I expect this isnt new. It's part of who he is. It may improve over time, or not. Don't expect it to evaporate just because the baby has arrived.

Return the BB, they are rubbish. Id keep the wrap, and buy your DH something like a connecta, manduca or Ergo. They're all buckle carriers so 'manly' enough but they all seat baby ergonomically so they will be just as comfy as the wrap and easier on your DH's back as baby gets bigger.

My DH doesn't wrap but he has a baby and toddler Connecta and loves them.

Baby bjorns aren't comfy for baby or wearer. I had one briefly, DD never liked it. I got a plain ergo baby, she's a hefty almost 9mo now and I can carry her all day long in it. There's a world of compromise between a Baby Bollocks and a wrap.

DH is quite strapping. We tried lots of wraps & slings with dd & the only one that worked for him was a Stokke one (crazy expensive). We were able to use as backpack style one older.
Wait til baby is here & try them out. Get yourself a cheaper wrap as well if it bothers you that much. It's not worth getting upset over.

I wouldn't have bought one at all in case baby doesn't like it. Also have baby due imminently and have been lent a baby bjorn to see whether it's worth buying one

My dh wouldn't use a sling/carrier at all. He worried about tripping with the baby.

This - my dp falls over fresh air so even I wouldn't let him wear it. Send it back and get the one you want.

Yabu - that's how feels and that's his preference.
If you can afford it, just get both.

How do you know Bjorn not comfy have you been in one

Our dd appeared to love it had she not have we wouldn't have used it.

This is fascinating. Do these men who don't want to be seen pushing prams or wearing babies in slings or carrying flowery changing bags really think that other people are actually interested in any way and making a judgement?

As the nuns at my school used to say, "nobody is looking at you". this sort of thing only applues if you have some sort of "image" that needs protection e.g. if you're David Gandy.

Oh and I don't think he'll change his mind when the baby arrives. Yes he will adore and love his baby, but no, he won't suddenly want to wear the womanly wrap sling.

You have a sling for you to use, and he can have his.

I think you're being a bit U with the "his image before baby's comfort". BabyBjorns are fine - in fact better than a sling in avoiding hip dysplasia in the early days - have a read of this product test and see if it reassures you - www.babygearlab.com/a/11099/Best-Practice-Tips-for-Baby-Wearing#Does-the-BabyBjorn-Cause-Hip-Dysplasia

Only1scoop I know that my DD always grizzled and never slept in the BB, whereas she slept well in the ergo and moby wrap. My friend's DS also cried in her BB until we used a scarf to support his legs knee-to-knee, at which point he was a lot happier. So I'm guessing they found it uncomfortable.

I'm so confused by the number of people concurring that men don't like to wear wrap slings, I have honestly never considered them a threat to masculinity! We had a navy Wilkinet the first time and a navy Caboo Close the second (much better) and neither of us ever thought of it as girly! Mind you, we were given a pink flowered Yummy Mummy changing bag and I did ask him if he'd prefer to use the plain black Boots one we got free and he was bemused at why he would need to, pointing out that he didn't think anyone was going to take him for an actual yummy mummy...I just don't get why this would be a problem for blokes at all? Definitely return the Baby Bjorn, so much less comfortable on the shoulders than a wrap!

I've worn a bjorn and it near broke me.

Show him this and ask him whether he thinks these dads have compromised their 'image'.

Or how about just letting the guy have his opinion and respect it?
There are loads of thing I wouldn't want to wear or carry. There are buggies I wouldn't choose to push around, slings I don't like and changing bags I wouldn't buy.
Is that ok? I should hope so.

I once borrowed my friends babybjorn sling for an afternoon as is left mind at home, it was extremely uncomfortable, but my baby was a massive chubby chunk so maybe it would be more comfy less painful with a newborn.

Rose and rebellion do nice buckle slings in a variety of colours and patterns, we turn ours inside out and then it's just plain black, or have it the right way around with the pattern.

My husband carried our babies in a bright pink moby wrap (we were given it, bright pink wouldn't have been either of ours first choice) he is a manly builder with tattoos but for him the baby being happy and sleeping well was more important than his image.

pictish that's fine. There are- as lots of people have reasonably suggested -alternatives to the BabyBjorn. What has happened is that the op who will be doing the vast majority of the carrying of the baby has been pushed into a decision she isn't happy with. There is a third way. That they find a sling which suits both of them. Buying a sling which only one parent- the one barely using it - likes makes no sense.

Beco Gemini in black. Buckles for DH. Better than a baby bjorn for DC. Or an ergo or connecta. DH uses it as do I and its great.

I only ever used the caboo close. DH wouldn't. But I didn't think it was crap of him. He wasn't comfortable in it.

Sure pictish but he's not objecting because it's uncomfortable or impractical or because he just doesn't like it. It's because he's worried it will make him look less 'manly'. He doesn't want to be brought down to the level of a woman.

I don't have any respect for that. Not all views and opinions are worthy of respect.

Expensive slings are best tried before you buy. DS did not like wrap type slings but would snooze happily in a bb. My plans for a beautiful fabric wrap went out the window and in came a 2 and hand bb.