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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be disappointed that I am having a girl?

323 replies

Bluebell84 · 27/03/2015 14:12

I have two DSs and I adore them. When I got pregnant again I was some excited, all I could think was me and my three sons.

I guess the rebel in me wanted to defy the notion that having a girl meant my family was 'complete'. the usual comments like 'if u r lucky it will be a girl' or 'third time lucky' was always hit back with 'but a third son will be lucky...'

I honestly love my sons so much.
we found out it is a girl.

I am devastated. I don't have a close relationship with my mother, never had sisters, have two close female friends (pretty shoddy after 30 years on this planet) and I hate shopping, I never did or want to do 'shopping trips' or day spas (but wouldn't mind a football match). I work a lot, don't know anything about fashion and not really into nails and having my hair doneZ

I feel like I am such a poor role model for a daughter. I didn't know what a clitoris was until I was in my 20s (strict religious home where waxing was seen as a sign of promiscuity) and was never taught girly things (my mother was not very maternal) and I feel completely at a loss as to what I am going to do with a little girl.

also my in laws want a daughter and I would hate to comply to their needs.

any advice will be lovely

OP posts:
JohnFarleysRuskin · 27/03/2015 14:26

I can sympathise with gender disappointment - it's an instinctive thing I guess.

I can't sympathise with any woman who thinks girls equal shopping nails and spas though. Wow.

Come on op- is that really what women are for you? Tell that to rosa parks, Marie curie, jess enis, Angela merkel etc etc.

ApplePaltrow · 27/03/2015 14:27

I think what's more scary than the gender disappointment is that you literally see this child as a pawn in an argument with your in-laws and strangers. Having a boy would make them unhappy so it makes you happy. I don't think that's healthy and it's setting you up for a lifetime of conflict.

FenellaFellorick · 27/03/2015 14:28

congratulations on your pregnancy. I think the important thing to keep telling yourself is that you are not your mother and your daughter will not be you. You won't repeat the pattern because you are aware of it and will ensure that you don't. Your husband is not his father either and your sons will not become second class citizens.

You are your own family, not doomed to repeat other people's shit. You'll make loads of fresh mistakes all of your own Grin but it will be fine.

You don't have to worry about how to be with a girl. Just raise your child, same as you're raising your other two and it'll all be fine.

I think you're an excellent role model for a daughter - and for a son. Be who you are. Like what you like, not what society tries to force on you because of what's between your legs.

She may love football, mud and climbing trees and that's ok.
She may love pink and all things sparkly and that's ok.
She'll probably love a combination of both and that's ok too.

seaoflove · 27/03/2015 14:28

Girls aren't all fashion and nails and shopping, any more than boys are all about football, cars and mud.

I can see why you're already resenting all the "finally a girl!" comments you're going to get (and I agree, you'll get them) but I think it's a bit unreasonable of you to be devastated.

Roussette · 27/03/2015 14:28

FWIW my DD and I go to rugby matches together, she would hate having her and I having nails manicured together. Relish the diversity you are going to have in your family.

myredcardigan · 27/03/2015 14:28

Stinkersmum, you need to step away from this thread. The op is looking for support and advice. She clearly has issues from her own childhood and her post comes across as if she is more terrified of parenting a girl that anything. I know lots of women who held similar views to a greater or lesser extent. And other women's fertility issues have zero impact on how the op is feeling. Their pain doesn't exclude her from feeling any.

Op, I was worried about parenting my daughter simply because of his much I adored my sons. But when she comes you will live her just as much as you go your boys.

TowerRavenSeven · 27/03/2015 14:29

I don't think yabu, you can't help the way you feel. But give it time.

When I got pregnant at 37 I really wanted a boy since I suspected that I would only be able to have one (I was right). Not wanting to be disappointed (though I'd truly be happy either way) I convinced myself it was a girl. So well that when it was announced it was a boy I was shocked!

I thought having a girl easier since I had no child experience at all, never even changed a diaper! But ds is 13 now and though it took a bit to get adjusted it all worked out fine.

Fwiw I know several families with several boys and one girl and the girl really wasn't into girly stuff. She made great male friends because she was treated like one of the gang. Take her lead, you will be fine!

Stinkersmum · 27/03/2015 14:29

WilsonWilsonWoman "Dumping other people's infertility issues at this poor woman's door is absolutely ridiculous and fucking cruel. Read her op properly."

I have - she says she's devastated she's having a girl. That's pretty fucking cruel & ridiculous imo.

ghostyslovesheep · 27/03/2015 14:29

the eldest 2 of my 3 DD's play football - every Sat and Sunday plus training 3 nights a week - one hopes to play for England one day

YABU with your stereotyping of girls to be honest

viva100 · 27/03/2015 14:30

Yabu.You're a woman yourself, OP, I'm pretty sure you know quite a lot about girls. As previous posters have said, it sounds like you need to address whatever issues you have with the other women in your life. And yes, you sound sexist. Girls are just as intelligent and interesting as boys, you know.

Grantaire · 27/03/2015 14:30

It's fine to be disappointed. It's not a reaction you can rationalise. It's a visceral punch to the gut which you don't actually want to feel but you can't help it. Sometimes you don't know why you react that way. Sometimes you can trace it to experience of relationships in the past.

When I was pregnant with my first and I found out it was a girl, I did wobble. Mostly because I have quite a difficult relationship with my own mother and I was terrified that I would repeat history. I didn't know how to have a close relationship with a woman/girl. I had mainly male friends and grew up close to my Dad and brother.

I can tell you a few things with the benefit of 8yrs of hindsight:

Raising girls and raising boys (I have both) is no different. They have the same need for love, care, respect and guidance. Their likes, wants and interests are guided by their individuality, not by their genitals. Really, all you actually know is that they have girl parts and not boy parts. You don't know their voice and their mind and their peculiarities and the things that make them inherently, wonderfully them.

You say you don't want to do spa things and girly stuff. Well what if you had a boy and they wanted to do that stuff. What would you do? Scream and run away? No, you nurture the individual you have. I have a little boy who loves ballet and pink and princess stuff and while it might not be my kind of thing, that's the point of parenting. You nurture them, you don't replicate yourself. Their enthusiasm for their interests is enough to sustain the both of you.

You find the sex thing melts away. You realise quite quickly once they're here that they're just a baby and the nappies and milk and sneezes and amazing hiccups are just baby things. You fall completely and utterly in love with the individual.

I am so glad I had a girl actually. I am not my mother, dd is not me. She is so much more than the sum total of my experiences. She is a blank canvas, ready to be her own person. She taught me that the wary, inherent mistrust I'd manage to develop where women were concerned was bloody ridiculous. MN and its brilliant women and this tiny girl I produced showed me that I was wrong. It was the best way to learn that I could have a strong, positive, wonderful relationship with another female. She taught me that.

You'll be fine. It's okay to feel a little grief for the boy you imagined. Then celebrate the girl you will have. She will change so many of your misconceptions.

Don't let people tell you your disappointment is wrong. I know you don't want to feel like this. People will say at least you can have a baby or at least your baby is healthy and yes they're right but of course you are mindful of that. This is a separate and unasked for worry.

It will pass. I promise. You're in for a great time. A third baby is such a gift and she'll be the strong, loving relationship with another female which you're missing out on.

Stinkersmum · 27/03/2015 14:31

myredcardigan I need to do nothing of the sort. My advise was to loom at the conception forum and see if the OP still felt so devastated. I stand by that and I'll stay in this thread, thanks all the same.

JohnFarleysRuskin · 27/03/2015 14:32

Lovely post grantair

myredcardigan · 27/03/2015 14:32

And the inlaw thing is understandable too. I have been at a wedding where the father if the bride stood up and said his life became worth living the day she was born and how she was all his hopes and dreams wrapped up. She was the third child with two older brothers sat listening. One of the DIL got up and walked out and everyone else felt very uncomfortable. So if the op's inlaws are anything like those then I don't blame her.

SaucyJack · 27/03/2015 14:34

Why don't you Google what's happening in Syria and then see if you think those on the conception forum have it so bad?

Trauma top trumps. The game where nobody wins.

The80sweregreat · 27/03/2015 14:35

I think your panicking! Not all girls grow up wanting gel nails and all things pink. My friend has a daughter and she didnt own a doll or anything remotely 'girly'. With older brothers around, she will probably prefer toy cars!
I wish you luck, you will love her as much as the others i am sure.

MisterDobalina · 27/03/2015 14:36

Nails and shopping? That's what sums up being a woman to you? Good grief.

DonnaMoss · 27/03/2015 14:36

It's fine to be disappointed but you are really stereotyping girls. I have 2 dd's and they are awesome. I'm raising them to be strong, independent free thinking humans, not all shopping, all spa day, high heeled wearing airheads.

stormyboots · 27/03/2015 14:37

It's ok to feel disappointed when the reality doesn't match the idea you had in your head but don't get too bogged down with stereotypes.

By your reasoning any 'typical' girl should find it hard to mother boys, as they obviously wouldn't have done boy things. This clearly isn't the case.

I have girls and boys, and my boys adore care bear's and my little pony, my eldest girl never had time for any of that. Every child is different.
I really hope some of the comments reassure you.

myredcardigan · 27/03/2015 14:37

But the fact that some women can't conceive is totally irrelevant.
It's like saying you shouldn't grumble that your house is a bit small and needs decorating because you're lucky to be able to afford a house.
The op certainly shouldn't bother looking at infertility threads. They have nothing to do with her feelings whatsoever. Of course she's grateful to have heAlthy children already. To post telling her to be thankful when she clearly has issues relating to how her parents and PIL view girls is neither relevant nor helpful.

Grantaire · 27/03/2015 14:37

Syria Saucy? Fucking Syria? Try Libya.

I lost my last gingerbread man to the cat this morning too.

And you come on here with your Syria woes.

Sheesh.

Coffeethrowtrampbitch · 27/03/2015 14:38

Yanbu op, when you have had a troubled or abusive relationship with a parent, having a child of the same sex often makes you worry about that relationship.

You need to tell yourself you are a mum already to your sons and a good one. You will be just as good a mum to a daughter, she doesn't have to be girly to be happy and to be honest with two big brothers she's likely to be a tomboy because the house is already got lots of interesting boy toys.

I know how you feel about the in-laws, I wanted ds2 to be a girl simply because they decided he should be a boy (we had a ds and a dd and it didn't matter what he was, he was loved and wanted).

I hope you get used to your dd, try to think of her as a person rather than her gender. Will she be like you, your dh, like one of her brothers and not the other? Thinking like this helped me, good luck with your pregnancy x

Stinkersmum · 27/03/2015 14:39

Saucyjack apples and oranges. 2/10.

ThroughThickandThin · 27/03/2015 14:39

It's okay to feel a little grief for the boy you imagined. Then celebrate the girl you will have. Concise, lovely and appropriate Grantaire.

You'll be fine OP. When she's here you wouldn't want it any other way.

Theycallmemellowjello · 27/03/2015 14:40

To be perfectly honest, OP, it does sound like you have some issues about girls/women. All this talk of shopping/nails/spas/hair-dressing etc, worrying about how boys are considered lower than girls and saying you have few female friends does seem to me to hint at some quite negative attitudes towards our gender. And actually I think that this could be quite damaging for a little girl. I would recommend having a few sessions with a therapist to address this, or at the very least exploring where those thoughts might be coming from. I also think maybe you might think about doing some light reading on feminist stuff -- Caitlin Moran's how to be a woman and Laura Bates' column in the guardian are very accessible for example.