...To think the mum who attacked bullies is RIGHT?

[candidkate]

Just read this story

www.manchestereveningnews.co.uk/news/greater-manchester-news/i-know-what-wrong-im-8870532

This poor mum has witnessed her DD be bullied for years. 15 school kids had the balls to even show up at her home screaming abuse, threatening to kill her poor DD! She comes home furious and attacks one of them, punching the other who tried to break it up.

I don't condone violence full stop. But these were 14 year old hardly little kids who do not know better. I'm sorry but I'm putting my hands on you before you ever harm my child!

It was a daunting situation - she had even called the police and what did they do? Nothing. Kids are killing themselves while schools and police twiddle their thumbs. Enough it enough!

I'm not convinced 13 year olds can be classed as "just children" when they're in a group. But I don't think that violence is the answer. It isn't self-defence if the person isn't in immediate danger, and so isn't right in my opinion. It is understandable, but definitely not right.

Police do need to take groups of teenagers more seriously though. As I found out when I was intimidated / threatened with rape by a group of teenage lads recently. The 101 operator didn't even want to record what happened to me.

No 13 yo should be untouchable. What exactly is a parent supposed to do if fuck all else is being done by the authorities? As we all know, those in power can too often turn a blind eye...

I'm frankly sick of the black and white under-18=innocent and anything over that gets the book thrown at them. There's room for plenty of grey. I'm sure the parents of children grievously hurt by children would not want a blanket free pass to the perpetrators!

Sometimes, making excuses for feral, plain cruel behaviour only exacerbates it. Violence is not the answer but neither is blind faith in the system...

BMW6 and Greys
Both equally disturbing and upsetting. I hate the fact that kids have this security of being "untouchable" and therefore think they can do whatever they like. It sickens me that so many kids are so lacking in compassion.
If there are no consequences for their vile behaviour either from the parents, police or the schools it's just going to carry on.

Her royal hotness, thanks for thinking of my daughter.

I do not condone any form of violence, ever. I've never even sworn at someone.

But to those of you who haven't experienced bullying let me give you a snapshot of the effect it's had on our lives.

The best way I can think of describing my DD is broken. She doesn't leave the house unless absolutely necessary and then only during school hours in the hope she won't meet any of the bullies. Weekends, evenings, holidays she never ventures further than our back garden. She has anxiety and panic attacks and is now medicated and under camhs. She has a diagnosis of post traumatic stress disorder.

She was an A* student, on course to sit her exams this summer. Now she can barely concentrate on more than getting herself washed and dressed.

The two sides to every story: she bumped into a girl by accident in the corridor outside French one morning, unfortunately the girl refused to accept her apology and it all went downhill from there.

I have been shouted and sworn at by these girls, they take great delight in trying to intimidate all of us. To spit at an 8 year old disabled boy and call him a 'spazza fucktard' is a new low. However, again there are no independent witnesses so the police can do nothing.

I would never take the law into my own hands, but I totally understand why some people snap. It's a living hell :-(

Good on her, maybe the horrible little bullies will think twice next time they want to make someones life a misery!

Theres a saying my my grandad had, people who go looking for trouble should always find it, ..thats very apt here, these were not small children, evil little cunts can't stand bullies,

Dragzena
I've just seen your post about your daughter. I'm so sorry, how awful for her. I hope that one day it all gets better for her and she can enjoy her life again. I'm sure that will happen.
To spit at a little boy who is disabled is shocking. How unbelievably nasty. I know they say there is no such thing as Karma but I hope one day the bullies get their comeuppance and know what it feels like to get treated the way your family have.

Fucking hell. I'd be LIVID if I encountered this sort of thing. I'm so sorry for those of you who have been affected by bullies in this apologist world.

We had class bullies at high school but we all complained and the school took a stance - and they were suspended.

Dragzena I'm fuming on your behalf. Those children are fuckers. I honestly don't know how you keep from going for them. Your poor DD.

Always makes me angry when people come onto a thread and say 'I havent read all of the thread BUT.....' Well I haven't read all of the thread but Im so sorry for anyone who is the victim of bullies....I dont think there are many things that make me more angry.

My 'suprise baby' born when I was almost 41 - my DS4. Bright lad, very compassionate etc etc. He went to our local high school. Great teachers but massive amount of pupils. The end of year 7, all of years 8 and 9 were horrendous for him. He never told anyone else.

One night, when I was wandering around FBook, I had 5 private messages. 2 were from female class mates who had known him since nursery and 3 were from other parents whose children were worried sick about my lad. They all gave me the same name.

The next day I rang school and gave them the name and told them that either it is sorted by the end of the day or I will take it into my own hands.

Some progress was made. However, that night, I went to the bottom of the road where I waited for my lad. He walked down but didnt see me. The bully ran behind him and kicked him to the ground. I got to my lad and said to him 'go straight home now and I will sort this.' I walked to the bus stop where the lad was and waited a while. I then shouted his name - he came towards me and I said that I needed to speak to him. He was much taller than me. I told him who I was and then grabbed him by the jumper and shirt and rammed him up against the wall. I DID NOT hit him but I screamed in his face until the bus came. Then I marched him onto the bus and announced to the driver and everyone else on the bus what he had been doing to my son for over a year.

It stopped that day. I do not condone violence but I saw red when I realised what had been happening with my precious lad.

Sending my love and thoughts to everyone on this thread who is going through this horrible time with their children. xxxx

I keep from going at them as I'm scared of them. They may all be 15/16 year olds but they're all head and shoulders taller than me and very intimidating.

They know exactly how far to go and have actually stopped mid torrent of abuse when my neighbour arrived home. We considered cctv but the police said it's not admissible evidence.

And from what I hear they've moved on to new victims within school and are still getting away with it. And these are all girls from what would be considered 'well to do' families, mostly professional parents.

Shabbs, nice one. And how empowering to have a parent who can and will kick ass (metaphorically) when you're in trouble.

Dragzena geez, dreadful situation. There has to be a way forward, surely (though I don't know what)...

So, the school do nothing?!

Shabbs well done, you handled that brilliantly. You must have literally put the fear of God into the little shit.I hope your son is enjoying school now.

If schools don't act, these things will happen. Schools comment was crap.

If cctv isn't admissible evidence then why the hell are towns up and down the country full of them. Why shouldn't they be admissible evidence. It's like the police are determined to let the scumbags get away with it. I bet it'd be admissible if it suited them though.

I don't know what the solution is London, bar moving - which we can't do as we've had adaptions made to the house for Ds. I do feel that I've failed Dd, my job as a parent is to protect her and yet she's in this situation.

I don't think all schools deal with low level bullying enough and it ends up escalating into situations like ours. I think police forces need to take it more seriously too. We have been fed every platitude in the book and no one seems to want to help.

I think it's very easy for lots of Mners to sit in at the idea of an adult punching a 'child' in the face. Only a gang of teenagers screaming abuse outside your house is not the same as a group of seven year olds playing on swings.

Stop this ridiculous sentimentality about the children. These were young adults behaving despicably, feeling invincible - believing that they could behave in this way without consequence because, as a society, we've given them this message. And in this woman's position, if they had treated my daughter that way, I might have snapped too. And if I didn't, I would have wanted to. The only thing that would have prevented me was concern for the consequences on my family, not concern for these abusers.

In fact, I'll don my hard hat and say the unsayable: Dominique Nash learned a valuable lesson. She learned that if she behaves like a violent, bullying, antisocial little bitch she is stepping outside the conventions that keep us all civilised and someone might just treat her the way she was treating her victim. She learned that however big and hard you think you are, there's always someone bigger and harder, which is why it's better to respect the conventions we mostly live by. I have zero sympathy for her. I hope it scared the life out of her. I hope it makes her think twice about ever repeating her behaviour.

Spring tulip, apparently private cctv isn't admissible. I did suggest they put cameras up themselves but no resources for that. I wanted to go to the local paper but Dd doesn't want that and I can't put her through any more.

Some people are being horrible to the OP for no real reason.

Me and my husband were harassed by a 15 year old kid. Totally harassed, he happened to live next door to us. We had dog shit posted through the door, stones thrown at our heads, he used to knock on our door at 1.00am and shout names at us. It got to the point where we basically locked ourselves away. People couldn't understand why we couldn't sort a kid out, why we were so scared. We had to tape our letter box up because we would walk past to see his face looking through at random times. He would refuse to move out of the way of the car when my dh parked it. This went on for well over a year, he also bullied my kids. Knocked on the walls constantly it was all horrendous.

The police did fuck all. Fuck all. The council wouldn't move us or threaten to evict them without hard evidence and our evidence wasn't enough. CCTV would have covered our house but he made it clear he would just follow us down the street and buy the time we got one thankfully they move of their own accord to a smaller house.

My husband is 6 foot and huge and the kid just laughed and said if he laid a hand on him he would get in trouble. My husband was very close to hitting him. He actually ended up in a terrible mental state and then ended up in hospital. Did they do anything then? not a thing. When we tried talking to the mum she threw a wooden plank at our heads (missed badly)

So I completely understand what the mother did. 'Thankfully' my husband only ended up hurting himself because he would have probably killed him due to his size alone. I can totally see how someone else would lose it like she did. Of course it is not the right action but I can't say I wouldn't be driven to do the same for my kids.

Much love to those who have children who are suffering or have suffered from bullying.

There are some really devastating stories here.

If anyone can read them and not see how one can be lead to violence themselves then they lack some serious insight.

God, some incredibly sad stories here. DS has just admitted to me why he went through a period of not wanting to go to school. An older boy grabbed him round the throat, said "you're fricking dead", and squeezed so hard that DS thought he was going to die because he couldn't breathe. DS was only 4 at the time and the other boy was a complete stranger. That was 3 years ago and we've since moved schools but have had a similar incident recently.
I've given up on telling DS to never fight back, just tell a teacher, because they don't seem bothered. He's small for his age and a lovely, sensitive little boy but I've taught him some self-defence and told him if he's ever attacked again to do whatever he has to to protect himself and I'll take it up with the school afterwards.
I personally wouldn't punch a child but if my son did to protect himself I would back him all the way.

Poor woman must have been desperate. Although its wrong to punch a 13 year old, a mother's instinct is to protect her child..most of us would die for our child, I can't imagine my DD being hounded for years to the point of a gang of teens turning up at our front door, police and school not doing enough to help...and then remaining calm/trusting authorities to do the right thing and sort things out? No way - Id have been driven to the absolute end of my tether with fear anger and sorrow, and would probably have lashed out too.

a few points
-every shop/ bank/factory in the country has private CCTV of course it is admissible.
-a thirteen year old is not a young adult!
-the mother rope in 2 men.they all chased this child into a playground, before punching her.
-damilola killers were sixteen
not his classmates as someone suggested

Kids are killing themselves while schools and police twiddle their thumbs. Enough it enough!

The girls were punched by an adult. She has now made those girls into her victims & her daughter's treatment will be overlooked & played down. She has achieved nothing!

Not to mention that resorted to being a bully to (literally) beat a bully... so hitting her daughter isn't ok (goes without saying) but an adult, hitting a child is perfectly fine, because it is revenge?

Hypocritical much?

Not hypocritical at all. We (most) have an innate desire of punishment for bad behaviour. If the law, in this instance, has a vacuum then that will provide the answer? If the law doesn't provide a legal process to do so then vigilantism occurs.

I have full sympathy for the mother in this. She and her family were under attack and the law was doing nothing.