to think that putting your 14yo on the pill and letting her sleep with her boyfriend at home is just bloody WRONG?

[macmonkey]

An (I thought) otherwise reasonable Mum has not only encouraged her 14yo to have sex with her boyfriend of several months but has the boy staying practically every weekend and lets them sleep together. I honestly believe she thinks it's the way to 'keep' a boyfriend. The first time she sent the girl to sleep with bf was when all the girls were over for a sleepover. What kind of message does that send to them? Not to mention the younger siblings, also in the house. So when her DS gets to 14 and brings a girl home, will she let them start shagging under her roof too? Or will she discuss it first with girl's parents, maybe? FFS. I'm practically speechless.

It seems irresponsible to me to just put up your hands and say "oh well that's just the way it is these days". Because we are all part of society, and how it is for teenagers now, is how we all make it.

I agree with everything you've said Vix. For your own dds - why not consider a girls school? My 14 year old is at one and the lack of that extra dimension of pressure (to be popular with the boys) is a blessed relief sometimes.

How you think you will be with your teenagers and how you think they will be with you, and the reality once you get there are often two very different things

On the little things, maybe. On the big things (like underage sex and allowing the BF/GF to stay over at 14), not really (17 and 15 here)

No girls schools anywhere near here, and relocating isn't really an option at the moment as I have an elderly parent to factor in too. But that aspect of my schooling was certainly a big plus for me and my peer group.

tbh SirVix I think your DD could poss attend the same school that mine has and it is not that bad. There is still time for them to be children unless they are in the 'popular' set.

SirVixofVixHall very sensible post!

both my dds have steady bfs but don't want to sleep with them and think sex is best for marriage. I don't necessarily agree but that's up to them.

Really sunny? You can pm me the name if you like. It has only one English vowel if that helps narrow it down...

lol no must be a different one then.....it begins with P and teaches through English and is near a uni....

oh does it begin with T sirvix?

No. It is a Welsh language school. Not near a Uni, well not very near. About an hour away from Aber.

Ysgol Dyffrin Teifi? clutching at straws

That has five English vowels. . I will pm you.

You may be interested (or not) to know that said 14yo recently split with the boyfriend/fuck buddy as 'he didn't want commitment'. I bet he bloody fucking didn't.

I agree with everything you've said Vix. For your own dds - why not consider a girls school? My 14 year old is at one and the lack of that extra dimension of pressure (to be popular with the boys) is a blessed relief sometimes.

Too funny! When I was a teen, it was the single sex school girls that were the most boy crazy. Those who went to mixed schools had already seen the warts.