my dp NEVER tips

[suzzieanneba46]

My dp just refuses ever to tip. This is because he worked in a pizza restaurant when he was a student and never got any of the tips as he worked in the kitchen.

Aibu to think he needs to give this up and just go along with social norms?

This thread isn't going anywhere, there are two distinct camps - tippers and non-tippers and I know which one I would prefer to be in. I am surprised at the number of non tippers, I tip my hairdresser, my window cleaner, waiting staff (not as a matter of course, but if the servivce is good). If I haven't got a lot of change on me, I just give something, it might not be bang on 10%, but I leave something.

As someone said upthread - forget the NMW, it is something that is built into the job, they deserve it (and by saying that, I don't mean that others on the NMW don't, but it's just the way it is).

For all those who are 100% against tipping - I'm intrigued, what do you do when out with a large group for say a pub meal? Are you happy to let everyone else pay your share of the tip? Surely if it's a meal for say 12 people and the bill ends up as for example £37.40 per couple (or £18.70 each), please don't tell me you ask for your change back from one or two £20 notes...

Rousette doing something because "that's just the way it is" is a pretty rubbish justification for tipping, especially when you've recognised that there are other people on NMW who work just as hard.

Happy tipper here. I also tip taxi drivers and hairdressers unless I am unhappy with the service.

I can't be friends with non-tippers in restaurants. So parsimonious. This is like the shoes on/off and recline/non-recline. Bet I could hazard a guess what camp non-tippers fall into.

Oh for goodness sake. Why do you say please and thank you? They're only words. You say them because in our society/ culture that's how you show appreciation and manners. You can't question every little thing like this because there isn't logic behind it . It's convention. It doesn't claim to be logical

Ahhh but I'm realistic Jumble, rubbish though it may be. I did a waitressing and a chambermaid job decades ago (I'm old!) and I got tips and that isn't going to change, whether anyone likes it or not. By choosing not to tip because others on NMW don't get tips just shows people up as a bit tight I think. Waiting staff get tips, end of. Just embrace it people. That's the way it is, and I do my bit by tipping others where and when I can (binmen, postman, hairdresser, window cleaner).

Big groups I just chuck in whatever is the agreed split
It's not worth getting into any debate about the rights or wrings of tipping. I care more about not making it into a big deal or an issue than I do about my stance on tipping.

I also don't think it's a matter of being stingey, I feel I'm generous in many ways I just don't agree with a tipping culture in the uk/Ireland, it's not really a matter of money or wanting to save cash.
I know others will think that not tipping means someone is automatically stingey or not generous, c'est la vie I won't be changing their minds not they mine.

I'm with many others on here that I think stingeyness or tightness is one of the least attractive traits a person can have and I detest it in others. But this is one of those things that seems to split people on whether it is actually tight as opposed to someone who dodges their round or never picks up the lunch bill or only orders the most expensive thing when out to dinner in a group if they know the bill is going to be split evenly among them so that they're essentially looking for others to subsidise them.

It doesn't matter though, does it, whether people tip or don't tip? It's not mandatory and never will be. Why would either 'side' impose their way of doing things on the other? As the for the name-calling, that's utterly pathetic. I wouldn't comment on somebody not tipping, if they don't want to they don't have to. I would do it - not because I particularly want to if it's not deserved but because it's the 'convention'. I wouldn't expect the head-patting that some on this thread are revelling in though... Yikes!

I tip, I don't much like doing it for mediocre service, rounding up and adding a £1. I think that we're celebrating and rewarding very mediocre service in the UK as it's the norm. I tip very well when the service is excellent - that's what tipping should be, I think. We're a bit mindless as a nation, following the crowd and doing it because it's always been this way... not exactly something worth crowing about, is it?

I would have liked to tip the lady behind the cheese counter in Tesco. I went to buy cheeses, didn't know much about them and she popped around the counter to come and show me and describe all the cheeses, what goes with them, etc. I thought she was an excellent ambassador for Tesco and I gave them feedback online later but could I tip her? No, emphatically not. Did she deserve a tip? Absolutely she did.

Stop name-calling those of you who are doing it, you sound like idiots and happy to be in a crowd.

Refusing to tip is hardly campaigning for companies to pay a living wage, is it?

cross-posted with MQv2

Tipping isn't just something that happens in the UK. It happens in most countries. It is done in service industries because it encourages better service. Whether or not it is a social convention, the fact that it happens means that wages in those industries are lower than they would be if there was no tipping. Wages would inevitably go up if people didn't tip so the price of food etc would be higher. The people who don't tip are being subsidised by those that do and their reasons for not tipping are really just excuses for being stingy and it's not a good character trait.

Agree with lying witch
I don't see it as a massive deal
I don't think those who tip are throwing coppers at indentured servants and exoecting to be lavished with praise for it nor do I see it as an issue for either side to berate the other (although I would say that as a filthy non tipper).

I just don't tend to tip but then again I will tip from time to time out of convenience if I'm not bothered waiting round for change at a pub or if I'm in a group etc.
it's not some crusade I'm on I just don't really agree of see the point in tipping but bar this thread it doesn't occupy my every waking moment thinking about it.

And now I've x posted

Surely you're subsidising the employers who would otherwise have to pay more (which I'm not sure is true, I think that they'd probably still just staff at the MW) rather than non tippers

MQv2 -if employers had to pay more in wages they would increase the price of food etc though.

Well if we're throwing insults around....

I think a lot of people like to tip because they're narc. tosspots with secret Lady of the Manor complexes who like to make the little peasants follow them around licking their arses just so they can throw them a few quid and pretend they're doing them a favour.

Blimey this thread is one extreme to the other

Pathetic, Saucy. Just pathetic.

I am amazed by all these people who don't tip in restaurants. As far as I'm concerned you are expected to tip 10-15% and unless the service was actually bad it is equivalent to not paying part of the bill. If you can't afford to tip then choose a cheaper restaurant! Restaurants pay their waiting staff - and those staff take the job - on the assumption that most people tip. I feel like a right mug now, subsidising all you non- tippers all that time! No wonder an increasing number of places just include service in the bill. Actually I wish they all would - it would be easier. Plus DH tends to over tip.

Fair play Roussette, I see your point. I think perhaps I'm bitter, I worked in retail for many years (with a horrible company who didn't value me at all!) and struggled to get by on NMW. I've also worked as a waitress and whilst I didn't get much in the way of tips, it was a nice bonus when I did because it was good to know my hard work was recognised.

I'm in the middle camp I think, I haven't read the entire thread but some people are getting so worked up on something that, aside from this thread, other people don't put that much thought into it. I tip if I have had good service (and I can't think of many occasions where I've thought the service was less than good!) and if it was excellent I tip a bit more.

I do remember being a bit narked when I was in the states at the menu saying "tip 20% for good service, 15% for average service and 10% for poor service", I didn't want to tip anything for poor service

Saucy

Tbf the name calling is from the tippers to the non tippers so alls fair.

In RL no one cares. No one reacts the way people on here say they do to seeing someone not leave a tip.

Calling non tippers nasty, stingey etc doesn't make you look good. It makes you look a little like a twat who can't accept that people do shit differently to you.

Tip or don't tip. The world doesn't end if you don't and the world is fixed if you do.

I would like to see prices in restaurants being increased to whatever food and drink needs to cost in order for the business to be sustainable and this tipping lark to end.

I've been thinking of a comparison and the only one is akin to me is, over-praising for nothing special. It has no impact, it's even resented after a while. What incentive is there ever to improve?

Why do we celebrate mediocrity so much in this country? Bonkers!

I think you've pricked a few, Saucy.

The lengths non tippers will go to justify their stinginess! Non tipping is stingey and mean and you know it really. the "arguments" against are hilarious, social justice, pleading poverty, tipping is narcissistic (the best so far!) and getting more ludicrous as the thread progresses - carry on it's very funny!

You order food, pay for that food.

Not tipping isn't mean or stingey it's a choice.

Tipping doesn't make you a better person than the person next to you who doesn't tip.

Get over it. It's a choice, some people do it and some don't. It's no big deal.

Livingwitch is so right