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AIBU?

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See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

'Hold me back I'm bout' to sp**?' [[Title edited by MNHQ]]

154 replies

NoArmaniNoPunani · 18/02/2015 08:30

I know Kanye West is a monumental douchecanoe but this line from his latest song with Paul McCartney is a step too far even for him.

I have CP and I never act like massive bellend Kanye.

AIBU to think Paul McCartney might have refused to put his name to a song that uses that line?

OP posts:
MuddlingMackem · 18/02/2015 20:47

SusanIvanova Wed 18-Feb-15 20:34:10

Weird al apologised for that and said the word didn't have the same connotations in America. I'm not saying they should have used it in this country but plenty of meaning gets lost in translation even if it's just over the pond.

Blu · 18/02/2015 20:49

Paul McC?
Hmmm - wasn't Heather Mills widely believed to be making stuff up about him being disablist?

ChaiseLounger · 18/02/2015 21:52

Kanye and McCartney are both twots.
Ds1 used the word the other day and I told him off and told him what it meant and that he wasn't to ever repeat.

Gemzybelle · 18/02/2015 22:01

My DD was very premature and as a result has cerebral palsy. That word is like a punch to the gut whenever I hear it as I hate the thought of her one day having to grow up and have it used in her direction.

Which as long as ignorant bastards like this exist she probably will.

LapsedTwentysomething · 18/02/2015 22:12

So shocked at the 'just a word' responses here. That's exactly what my gran keeps insisting when I pull her up on the word 'Paki' (and my aunt and uncle, and a kid in school last week so no need for the 'it's a generational thing' excuse either).

In fact, sorry to hijack, but a former colleague of mine who's a teacher in middle management used 'spaz' on her Facebook recently. She's no friend of mine but it showed up in my news feed because she tagged a mutual friend. Would you have reported it? I didn't because her employer knows I find her unprofessional and may take it less seriously as a result.

Ujjayi · 18/02/2015 22:24

I actually tweeted a complaint to Radio 1 a week ago about this track & the use of that word...the irony of playing it during their Positivity Week which was an anti bullying campaign. No reply.

ribena71 · 18/02/2015 22:31

I heard this song on Radio 1 this afternoon and that word was muted out, so it seems they may have caught on to the offensiveness of it. Better late than never?

tazzle22 · 18/02/2015 22:40

Have you ever heard those words used in a complimentary way? No, because they're used as insults. The meaning hasn't evolved or changed at all.

I am old enough that I do remember the factual, medical use of the words and they were not invented / origionally used as insults. ( why would the spastic society chose an insulting word as its title if it was always an insult ?)

Sadly there are people that will hijack almost any terminology that refers to someone that has a learning or physical disability / challenge / impairment and use it as an inusult or in a derogatory way to that person or someone "non affected" that they wish to put down / disrepect.

Of course words and language mutate and use changes. even simple tings like "bastard".. used to be just a word that referred to a child conceived out of wedlock ... now its a commonplace swearword referencing bad / evil people.

tazzle22 · 18/02/2015 22:41

that does not mean I agree that the term being discussed is acceptable today

Original poster
NoArmaniNoPunani · 18/02/2015 22:44

Razzle, you don't need to be that old to remember that. I'm 33 and my mum was told by doctors that I was a spastic when I was born. It was definitely an insult by the time I went to school in the mid 1980's.

OP posts:
FrancesNiadova · 18/02/2015 22:51

3 1/2 years ago, my 1st trip out after my accident when I'd come out of plaster & bravely decided to leave the wheelchair in the car & use my crutches. I still couldn't weight-bear on 1 leg. I remember a group of teenage girls coming out of the lift, 1 walking backwards to talk to her mates walked right into me & of course I couldn't move quickly enough. Her friend grabbed her to try to stop her, she really was oblivious; when she turned & saw me she said to the shopping centre,
"Well I didn't know she was a spaz did I?"
I was so upset. I meekly allowed my DH to usher me into the lift, but when we got to the top we turned round & went home. I was so upset & well, belittled really.
It's a horrible word to use & my sympathies go to anyone verbally abused by such a demeaning word. Anyone with any illness/injury should have people's support, not derision.Angry

WineWineWine · 18/02/2015 23:09

It is a disgusting word that has no place in anyone's vocabulary

limegoldfinewine · 19/02/2015 01:52

It's not considered as offensive in America. The same way that bitch and cunt (that get used on this board a lot) would be considered much more offensive over there. Can't police the world...

Hakluyt · 19/02/2015 07:18

" Can't police the world..."

Nope. But we can police our bit of it, though......

Dawndonnaagain · 19/02/2015 07:49

lime but if people like you did 'police the world' there would be far fewer people picking on me...

Dawndonna's dd.

3across2down · 19/02/2015 08:02

I wish people would have more understanding and empathy in situations like this discussion. Yes, it's just a word but to people with cerebral palsy and to their families, it is a hurtful, offensive word. My DS has cerebral palsy and has had to hear this word being used repeatedly at school. He told staff that he was upset and offended, they shrugged it off. I had a work with his teacher who said it was just a word and it wasn't worth the fight. He said the same about the word gay.
If you or your loved one hasn't got cerebral palsy, you won't necessarily understand the hurt but please accept that it does hurt, it is offensive and it is insulting to think it doesn't.

ThisFenceIsComfy · 19/02/2015 08:02

I remember the Spastic Society before they changed to Scope. I also remember using spaz as a taunt and insult when I was little before I realised how bloody dreadful it is.

Spaz is different to bastards or bitch. Spaz is specifically insulting someone because you think they look disabled. Think about that. Using disability as an insult. I can't believe people would think that is acceptable. It could be any word as it is the horrible intent behind the word that makes it offensive, no matter how casually it is used.

ImaMonet · 19/02/2015 08:15

Spastic is still very much used in medical terminology today. For example Spastic Quadraplegia.

However, that is not denying that it is also used as a derogatory term and the word 'spaz' is offensive in every way.

hazeyjane · 19/02/2015 08:22

You may not be able to police the world, but the song is played on an international platform. My online friends in America who have children with the same genetic condition as ds, do find words like 'spaz' and 'retard' offensive, as they have had those terms used in an insulting way directed at their children.

pbwer · 19/02/2015 08:38

Censorship is not the route to enlightenment

colleysmill · 19/02/2015 08:53

Muscle spasticity doesn't only affect people with a diagnosis of cerebral palsy - people post stroke, diagnosis of Ms, spinal cord injury can all suffer from muscle spasms and spasticity.

"Spaz" I loathe and detest so in that scenario yanbu and yes I would and do pull people up on it.

Dawndonnaagain · 19/02/2015 08:56

pbwer No, good manners and kindness help a great deal though. It's not hard to stop using a word and infact in some cases, censorship is the only way in which to live in a civilised society. There are words that people know they're 'not allowed' to use because they are derogatory, so they may think it, but keep those thoughts to themselves, that makes for a quieter, kinder society. That ensures that people are not bullied, villified for being 'other'. Glib comments such as yours are not particularly helpful.

merrymouse · 19/02/2015 09:06

Completely agree that this is offensive, particularly as Paul McCartney is British and old enough to know that it is offensive.

The rest of the lyrics are a bit ugh too

"If I go to jail tonight, promise you'll pay my bail" - Well actually, Mr famous and incredibly rich famous person, that might just depend on why you are in jail!

pbwer · 19/02/2015 09:14

DawnDonnaAgain. People have the right to be offensive and you have the right to be offended. Otherwise you end up with Paris.

Nevertheless I was referring to the somewhat bizarre censorship of a thread title which was quoted in context to protect what?

merrymouse · 19/02/2015 09:14

Although, poor thing, Kanye is clearly just struggling to find words that rhyme - bail, jail, sale - trash, sp**?.

Maybe next time he could try to write lyrics that rhyme, and aren't offensive, and after that he could try rhyming, not offensive and make sense.