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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

I am never going to be a granny.

131 replies

CameliousHumph · 11/02/2015 22:52

And I am actually. Quite upset about it.

D2. Let's be honest here. I can't imagine anyone. Actually choosing to live with her. I adore her but fucking hell, she is difficult (AS is a bastard).

D1, however, is NT. But just announced that due to the impending Oil War (in approximately 60 years) she won't be having children as it will be immoral to expect the next generation to deal with our mess..

Which means I won't get to be a granny and I am very upset about it.

OP posts:
PacificDogwood · 11/02/2015 22:54

Never say never.

None of us know if we are ever going to be grandparents.

What ages are your DDs?

Shamazeballs · 11/02/2015 22:54

Get puppies. DS1 (5) informs me he's having 200 children. I can probably loan you a couple of grandchildren from that and not miss them?

MrsTawdry · 11/02/2015 22:55

What do you mean "As is a bastard"? Hmm I do hope you don't mean as in a child "born out of wedlock" ??

Apatite1 · 11/02/2015 22:55

Well, it's their lives. Let them live them they way they want. So, YABU.

Shamazeballs · 11/02/2015 22:56

She means aspergers.

MajorBumsore · 11/02/2015 22:56

I think she means autistic spectrum is a bastard

Trills · 11/02/2015 22:56

I think "AS" is a bastard.

AS probably being a disease?

Asperger's symdrome?

Original poster
CameliousHumph · 11/02/2015 22:57

AS. Aspergers. It is a bastard. Truly. She's fine but bloody difficult to live with.

OP posts:
Mammanat222 · 11/02/2015 22:57

AS = Aspergers Syndrome?

BikeRunSki · 11/02/2015 22:57

I think OP means "Asperger's Syndrome /Autistic Spectrum" is a bastard".

Original poster
CameliousHumph · 11/02/2015 22:58

I think I probably need a few more babies of my own. Repopulate the decimated world.

OP posts:
Mammanat222 · 11/02/2015 22:58

X post

Trills · 11/02/2015 22:58

D1 may or may not change her mind.

But yeah, you should try to get used to the idea that it's a possibility.

Not everyone who wants to be a grandparent is one. Even if they have LOADS of children.

Do you have any nieces or nephews that you can chat up um suck up to um befriend?

PacificDogwood · 11/02/2015 22:59

Well, unless your DDs are post-menopausal, I think you'll just have to wait and see what the future might bring.

And yes, it IS their lives and no doubt they will live them as they see fit.
Many people on the ASD do have families btw - I am sure you know that?

CuntWagon · 11/02/2015 22:59

My mother can regularly be heard saying similar. The reason I don't want children is the horrendous way she treated me as a child. Grandchildren are not a right.

Original poster
CameliousHumph · 11/02/2015 22:59

I want to be one of those difficult grannies that pierces grandbabies noses and gives inappropriate presents

OP posts:
championnibbler · 11/02/2015 23:00

don't count your chicks just yet.
i've known loads of people who swore off kids altogether and the majority are parents now.

DejaVuAllOverAgain · 11/02/2015 23:03

How old are your children?

Hathall · 11/02/2015 23:04

I used to say I never wanted children and then I had 3.

I'd only be sad to not have grandchildren if my children were sad to not have any children so sorry but I find it hard to understand empathise with you.

GiddyOnZackHunt · 11/02/2015 23:04

Don't be daft :)
I'm almost certainly an Aspie. I was absolutely never having DC and I'm sure lots of people including my parents thought I'd be a tricky person to live with.
I have DH and DC. They all had to wait but it happened.
And MIL thinks I'm a log suffering saint for putting up with her DS. Grin

Lovemycatsandkids · 11/02/2015 23:05

Ah op you never know.'

People change their minds.

To be honest I love my grand cats.Grin

I will find it hard to see my kids struggle with the problems of parenthood and the thought of my dds going through labour is excruciating.

But it's their lives and you can only be there to support them.

TendonQueen · 11/02/2015 23:06

Ah, I said that sort of thing for years and years so I would keep quiet and wait to see if she changes her mind. She'll only dig her heels in more otherwise.

Anyway, it's their turn (or not!) so they get to decide. It's to my parents' credit that they never nagged me about grandchildren even though they very much wanted them.

iklboo · 11/02/2015 23:07

I was never going to have children as ex was an utter bastard. Split with ex, met DH & now have DS.

Does your DD2 have a TARDIS in order to predict the 'Oil War in 60 years'? Sorry to be flippant, but it's quite a strong statement / belief she has expressed. How old are your daughters? Are they in relationships?

That being said, if they genuinely don't want children, that's their choice I'm afraid.

LurkingLilly · 11/02/2015 23:07

Ah never say never! I was adamant I wasn't having children...got two now and love them to bits! Can't even remember what was so great about my life before them lol!

ghostyslovesheep · 11/02/2015 23:09

DD1 - wants to rule the world - no time for kids
DD2 - will adopt 1 baby but never have sex/give birth as it's icky
DD3 - is having 48 babies - all boys called Dave

My mum took to carrying a picture of my cat in her purse to pull out when her mates got the baby pics out - I did give in eventually!