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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think its perfectly fine for my sis to take our kids overnight. Alone.

134 replies

macnab · 06/02/2015 23:02

My sis is in her 30s. A responsible mature girl who is a primary school teacher and therefore commands a huge group of kids every day.

She is dating my DH brother and they pretty much live together at this stage (her house). She asked if kids could have a sleepover tonight as she'd not seen them for a while. They are 4 & 6 and adore her. All happy. Till DH realised just now that his brother isn't there tonight (he has to be somewhere early tomorrow so easier for him to stay home). DH is furious. Says that he's shocked that I habe no problem with our kids staying with a girl on her own overnight "without any male presence"

WTF Hmm

I should add (and have pointed out to him) that I've often stayed here alone with the kids and its never been an issue but he's apparently too shocked, and annoyed with me, to be inclined to discuss it.

He's being a twunt isn't he.

OP posts:
Original poster
macnab · 06/02/2015 23:12

Sorry missed some responses. No I'm genuine, not a reverse post or whatever its called. DH is 43.

He's working (genuinely, he's on call tonight) so is now grumpily stabbing his laptop. I'll leave him off, dont fancy a row tonight but will definitely discuss (or try to) with him over the weekend

OP posts:
NorksAreMessy · 06/02/2015 23:13

Is she a part time fire-eater?
Does she keep pet lions?
Is she a mad professor type with bubbling jars of green chemicals on the sideboard?
Knife-juggler?
Does she live in a secret underground lair, likely to be attacked by Batman or similar?

No?
Your husband is a loon.

TidyDancer · 06/02/2015 23:27

Wtf is wrong with him? I just do not understand why this would even matter? Does he hate single mothers? Would he have a problem if it was a single man looking after the DCs? This is just so weird.

Ohfourfoxache · 06/02/2015 23:31

Sorry but he sounds like an utter knob. Wtaf is his problem? I can't understand his stance at all. How the fuck can he justify thinkin like that?

Is he a controlling arse in other ways?

mrsnoon · 06/02/2015 23:36

When you discuss this with him make sure he knows that passing on this disgusting attitude to your children is not acceptable either.

Cockadoodledooo · 06/02/2015 23:48

Are your dc boys? Not that that would make it understandable to me..

DoJo · 06/02/2015 23:48

Are you allowed to be on your own with your children if he isn't at home?

MomOfTwoGirls2 · 06/02/2015 23:50

Weird. I can imagine the reverse, some people expecting a woman to be there...

Of course, if you were ever to dump him, they would regularly be without a male presence. So he had better cop on to himself...

Original poster
macnab · 06/02/2015 23:55

One boy, one girl. I've often stayed home alone with them if DH is away. Never an issue - although maybe he's fretting the whole time and I just dont know? Or maybe he doesnt trust my sis? But I cant imagine why.

hhhmm I'll try to get to bottom of it and will make sure he knows that he's an idiot.

OP posts:
flowerpowerspiceknicks · 07/02/2015 00:00

Does he know something about her you don't? If not he is strange...there seems no where safer for the kids! (apart from your own home) and most people would be grateful of someone related who would give childcare relief Confused

ShiningBright · 07/02/2015 00:09

Oh shite. I'm a single mother. Is there a man out there who will come and take dc as I can't be left alone? Please help, it's been 5 years.
WTAF???

Worksallhours · 07/02/2015 00:09

Does he have some sort of phobia about burglars or something, op?

FoxgloveFairy · 07/02/2015 00:16

Good God. That is all.

LillyEvans · 07/02/2015 00:30

I'm confused, is this because your husband thinks a woman (or girl) is not capable of looking after children without the guidance and support of a man; or is this because he thinks your sister would be abusive in some way?

Heynowbill · 07/02/2015 00:33

I assumed it was more to do with thinking they need a man to ward away intruders. Still bonkers though.

Momagain1 · 07/02/2015 00:40

I could see him being bothered if the woman in question were just his brothers girlfriend. But it's your sister, their already actual aunt.

He is a first class twunt.

Topseyt · 07/02/2015 00:43

ConfusedConfused

Sometimes (quite regularly actually) the only male presences in our house with me are the dog and the cat!!! Do you think they count as good enough?? After all, I do have three daughters!!!

I can't see his problem. In fact, I'd say he was being an arse. That is where he has his head stuffed (up his arse) if he seriously thinks that a 30 year old teacher can't cope with two small children.

my2centsis · 07/02/2015 00:43
Biscuit
Ohwhatfuckeryisthis · 07/02/2015 00:44

Has she got her Certificate in Looking After Children Without The Aid of as Man? No, in that case DH is perfectly justified in his obviously male and therefore correct, stance of being a twunt
Pffft indeed.

Cassns1 · 07/02/2015 00:47

Has he said why he thinks a male presence is so important ? Don't think at that age kids really care as long as they are having fun....

Patsyandeddie · 07/02/2015 01:27

Don't you dare back down, the man has serious problems!

MooseBeTimeForSnow · 07/02/2015 02:08

So what does he think happens when they're at school? Similar time period of only being supervised by one grown up at a time.

catsofa · 07/02/2015 02:22

I'm so sorry, I'm just having to mark my place here to see what on earth he envisions them specifically needing a man for. Is it in case there's a very very important jar of something that she can't open on her own? Is it in case somebody needs to explain the offside rule?

CheerfulYank · 07/02/2015 02:39

I don't understand what the issus is. I'm honestly baffled.

SconeRhymesWithGone · 07/02/2015 02:48

It might help if you both stop thinking of her as a girl.