To tell you how I foiled one of those spready out men on the bus earlier?

[DaygloYellowLady]

I'm really quite pleased with myself and it was dead easy. I just sat slightly diagonally but still within the boundaries of my seat so when he started attempting to spread out his legs to air his bollocks he ended up with my bony knee stuck in his thigh with very little discomfort or contact to me. Then, when he moved his leg away I quite subtly stretched my legs ever so slightly into his space, I know this made me
just as bad as him but after years of being squashed into the window, thigh to thigh with a strange man it felt so sooo good. The best part was the slightly bewildered looks he kept throwing me as we trundled along, like that just wasn't the way things should have turned out.

Brilliant thread! I am only 5'2" so not really noticed this much.
Men who sit anywhere near me stinking of Red Bull and/or fags however, give me the rage.

I miss the old Lothian Buses with the side seats. You didn't get people coughing over your hair, and spready out men didn't seem to choose them. I also think the wipe clean seats were a better idea than fabric considering how many people here think the seats are there for their feet/suitcase/dog's arse.

I don't like Lothian Buses. But I don't want to spend 40 minutes in the morning walking to work either. I'd probably suffocate on the fumes from the endless 'pavement improvements'.

What do you all do when you're with someone else (partner/child) and there are no empty double seats because everyone on the bus is sitting alone on the window seat, or they are in the isle seat with their bag on the window seat (IYKWIM)?

I'm going to try "surely they are not that big?" next time, thanks for the idea.

I don't mind not sitting with my DP or friend on the bus (although I appreciate it's different if you've got a small child). In these cases I just sit next to whoever I think most deserves a smile and a cheery 'Excuse me please!' so they're forced to move their bag or move over to the window for me.

OOAML I like it when an LRT bus has the single seat option! Can you try Firstbus? Depends where you work but if centrally might be an option?

If I'm with another adult I just sit separately

If I'm on my own with my children I make loud comments

" Don't worry darling you'll be FINE to sit over here BY YOURSELF "

Usually someone kindly volunteers to move . I've never had to turn it up to the next level of

" I'm SURE you won't be travel sick this time, you took your pills "

Closely followed by

" heres a plastic bag in case you can't get out of the seat in time "

Single seats are good too MadameOvary. First Bus no good for me, and on the occasions I have got one have found them vastly inferior to Lothian Buses (which is tough).

Ds is 15 and likes to sit next to me. I may try the bag idea, thank you . He still gets travel sick and he claims it helps if he puts his head on my shoulder and closes his eyes (I think he goes to sleep really).

Awhhhhh

DD is 15 and likes to sit seperately so she can pretend she's not with me

Aisle huggers are my pet hate. Can't be helped in shops with titchy aisles but I'm talking about the people who spread themselves and their trolleys across a 6 ft space and then seem amazed that anyone would want to get past.

Last week I resorted to making a Roadrunner-style "beep beep' noise at a woman in Muji who'd ignored 2 "excuse mes". It just came out. She clearly thought I was insane and couldn't out of my way fast enough. It was great. Next I'm going to try saying "Mush" to people who abruptly stop at the top of escalators in the rush hour

Pass me my purple hat...

They are talking about this on Jeremy Vine right now.

As in - men who spread their legs, not about this thread!

I'm listening. Well done Angela Epstein. DOWN WITH MANSPREADERS.

I once had a Spready man next to me. I asked him to close his legs, but he refused. So I moved to the empty seat opposite. At the next station a man got on and sat in my old seat – Spready man's legs snapped shut. I laughed at him, which he hated.

I was discussing this on another chat room, and someone said they'd heard a woman of a certain age say "young man, I am a doctor, and if you really have to keep your legs that wide, you should see your GP urgently"

I'm a woman of a certain age too, and I'm itching to say that.

'I also think the wipe clean seats were a better idea than fabric considering how many people here think the seats are there for their feet/suitcase/dog's arse.'

DH, a native Edinburgher, also pointed out the wipe clean ones are harder to set afire than the fabric ones and reminded me of the time he and I were in the top deck of the no. 16 bus and the person across the aisle vom'd all over the fabric seat.

I was discussing this on another chat room, and someone said they'd heard a woman of a certain age say "young man, I am a doctor, and if you really have to keep your legs that wide, you should see your GP urgently"

I'm a woman of a certain age too, and I'm itching to say that.

This made me laugh so much . I'd love to have the nerve to say it.
I've used the bag trick, as I mentioned upthread, i.e. letting my bag rest on the spread leg that is in my space. It usually has the desired effect. I've also used the umbrella trick, even better if the umbrella is wet.

Speaking of bags on seats, and aisle hoggers, I got on a bus one evening recently, and there were lots of people standing. I moved down through the bus to find a woman sitting with her bag cosily on the window seat. I said excuse me, politely, and indicated the bag seat. She looked me up and down as if to assess whether or not I deserved the seat.

I was not as polite as I had been, when it came to getting off the bus, and I had to clamber past her. Ahem.

Anyone else find that if traveling with men by car, you are expected to sit in the middle back seat so the men either side don't have to touch another man and can still spread out??

So let me get this straight, having read the original post again - you pointed your knees into this man's thighs, within the "boundaries" of your seat. Presumably he had done nothing wrong at this stage then and you were assuming he would. When he started to spread out (or you could say, moved his leg a little) he found your knee in his thigh and stopped. At this point all is fair I feel!

You then say he moved his leg away (or could we say noticed your leg and realised he had touched it). Again all seems OK. You then pushed over into him. Hmmmm. You say you know this makes you "as bad as him" but do you not think in actual fact with this particular gentleman you were the one in the wrong and he has not actually really done anything? Were you taking out your frustration with what has happened with other people on a potentially innocent person who happened to move his leg a bit?

Generalising like this is rife here as ever. Well done you for being as unpleasant as the people you criticise, and in this case taking it out on someone who had done nothing wrong. Girl Power woop...

I'm off to stand on the next lady's foot that I see and not even glance let alone apologise. After all a fair few ladies have done so to me on public transport so I guess I can just pick any other lady to take it out on regardless eh?

good luck with finding those ladies.

You heard him laydeeez, its time to shut up with all our girl power woops and shrink back into quiet ladylike silence.

Dadscare, your post is a masterpiece of passive-aggression. I'd like to applaud you for it.

Dadscare, is this you posting on MN from your phone?

Ah, males welcome as usual.

If this were reversed, men would be called sexist. This way round it's "empowering". As a stay at home Dad I see this all too much, from the funny looks at Tumble Tots as the only Dad there, to the general unpleasantness on here.

Enjoy ladies, keep convincing yourselves men are all bad, it'll make you feel better.

A large Polish man pushed me to reach his mates at the checkout. Excuse me, I exclaimed and was astonished to get an apology.