To tell you how I foiled one of those spready out men on the bus earlier?

[DaygloYellowLady]

I'm really quite pleased with myself and it was dead easy. I just sat slightly diagonally but still within the boundaries of my seat so when he started attempting to spread out his legs to air his bollocks he ended up with my bony knee stuck in his thigh with very little discomfort or contact to me. Then, when he moved his leg away I quite subtly stretched my legs ever so slightly into his space, I know this made me
just as bad as him but after years of being squashed into the window, thigh to thigh with a strange man it felt so sooo good. The best part was the slightly bewildered looks he kept throwing me as we trundled along, like that just wasn't the way things should have turned out.

Brilliantly expressed, Devora.

And I'm sure there was a study that showed what you say, Larrygrylls, but there have definitely been plenty of studies that show the opposite.

Another extremely telling one is when men and women are together in a social situation chatting. It has been shown time and time again that when both sexes speak for an equal amount of time the PERCEPTION is that the women are dominating proceedings and speaking more than men.

Spready out legs is about more than just a wandering thigh….

Whenever I look at that tumblr of men spreading out while women fold up to accommodate them, I'm reminded of a commonly-expressed desire by women with anorexia to want to be small. I don't mean that they want to wear a smaller size: they literally want to take up less space in the world.

The ancedotes about pavements involve women and teens so I don't think this thread is blaming men in particular for that! My perception is, that sort of lack of consideration mainly arises when people are interacting with someone else and maybe aren't sufficiently paying attention to what else is going on. If adult males are more likely to be going about alone - which for all sorts of reasons I'd guess may be the case - then I would expect them to be involved in less pavement blocking incidents.

I get spready out men every day on my commute - will definitely be trying this! OP, you are a hero!

Devora Yes I did just stop and eventually she squeezed over. DS is such a super polite little thing, causes offence to anyone. I do sorta think its hard instilling politeness when its not recipricated. At the moment DS doesn't notice.

Errol we seem to have a huge problem with women actually refusing to move off the cycle path even when you ding. OH was ahead of me once and while one 'lady' did move for him the other I caught saying "I aint moving for nobody". I nearly went into the back of her (not on purpose, she stepped into my path)

Oh bugger that should be he causes NO offence to anyone

Evidence here that spreadage is not necessarily always a Bad Thing

At least this guy was considerate and let the ladies have the space to themselves!

eek! That's awful, where the hell is it?

China

Good grief. I hope the fecker caught something very nasty from crawling around on the floor.

Just check under your seat in future - you never know!

I conducting a new experiment. This involves not yielding one inch of my personal space on trains to spreadymen unless a. V tall b. V large or c. Obviously infirm. Mitigating circumstances apply to all three.

So far they all just look puzzled and slightly.... wronged. They take about ten to fifteen mins to get that I am not shifting, that they will collide uncomfortably with elbows/knees/brollies if they keep going and eventually adjust spreadage accordingly. Is this a new campaign - Take Back Our Space?

Don't you feel uncomfortable with their thigh rubbing up against yours? That's what makes me lean away

They are just legs, Viv. Shoulders often touch too on trains.

People differ in their decisions regarding personal space and appropriate or inappropriate touching.

Sure, do what you are comfortable with. But if you are next to a spreader, you may well get touching thighs anyway even if you make yourself small - holding your ground at least makes you less cramped!

Yes it does make me feel uncomfortable. But I am so sick of being squished (commute for two hours a day). I am mad as hell and I am not going to take it any more!!!

waving pompoms and jumping up and down might work too!

It is what we need to do though. Just like Reclaim the Streets (pedestrians versus cars) we need to Reclaim the Legroom (considerate people versus spreaders)!

I definitely agree that it needs dealing with. I think my preferred option is saying, "shall we share this space fairly?". I'm also going to try having that spreaders website open (full screen) on my laptop the next time this happens when I'm working on my laptop on a train. This requires the stranger to be glancing at my screen. I reckon that will be ok.

I like Vivacia's approach. So far I have relied on sharp elbows and knees...

No, you're not fair, they are just Saving Room For Cats

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Purrfect. I do hope that goes viral, then we can look at spready-outy guys and say 'just imagining you with a pussy'.