AIBU to think my DB WBU to send me this email?

[dougierose]

I quote:

"Dear XX

Thanks for the thank you card. Thanks also for the teapot and mugs.

I am however perplexed by the presents you gave [XX ( his son) XX]. Clothes for a five and a seven year old. Five, I could just about understand, as something to grow into in a couple of years, although we thought it a little peculiar, when paired with a card for a three year old. Seven, I'm sorry, makes no sense whatsoever. XX [his wife] and I found it quite upsetting.

I really don't want to have to experience a feeling of dread every time we get something from you, which is the case now. I would therefore prefer not to exchange cards or presents in the future.

I'm very pleased to hear that you have found a nice house that that [XX your son, ie my own son] is settling into the new school and [XX your daughter, ie my own DD] is thriving at her school. We wish you the best of times."

Do you get on well enough with your brother that you could ring him to discuss?

I try to avoid using emails/texts in these situations due to potential misunderstanding.

On the plus side, one less present to buy!

Your gifts weren't great.
I wouldn't have been happy to receive them.

Their reaction is ott

You both seem a bit odd!

Families eh?!

You all sound a bit bizarre.

My 7 yo wears 7-8 clothes and she's not tiny. Maybe he found it upsetting because he felt it showed you know nothing about his son. I imagine if the clothes fitted or were not far off fitting there wouldn't have been a problem and the email would not have been sent. Is he large for his age? Small? Average?

Your SIL found it upsetting that her son has an item of clothing that's too big for him?
She really needs to get out more - and your brother is an arse.

You haven't told us OP - did you explain your thinking to them?

I totally get why you did it - you have experience of this brand and how small the sizing is and what is the point of buying a 3 yr old size 3 clothes - they will grow out of them in a week!

I would reply by explaining all you have said here re your knowledge on the sizing and the fact that the larger one was chosen specially as you thought they would like the design. You put a lot of thought and care into that gift. Then tell them that they are ungrateful and incredibly rude and it's totally fine not to buy presents for each other again and, until he is prepared to apologise to you, he can fuck off to the far side of fuck.

What a twat

next time: www.mtv.com/news/2057327/glitter-bomb-prank/

Upsetting? Feelings of dread? What a huge over-reaction! I've sometimes been given presents that made me raise an eyebrow, but I've never received anything upsetting!

Some clothes are sized small, and if the child is tall for 3, perhaps and age 7 top isn't all that far off. If your brother's kid is younger than your kids, he might not have realised that yet.

Hi, yes I explained my logic in my response.

We're not a close family. Even less close after this, heh?

I'd call. What is up with that email? Why didn't you call and actually speak to me? The brand sizes are notorious for running small which i would have explained had you called. Did you try them on him?

A feeling of dread? Seriously? Yes, let's not bother with gift exchanges any more if you get this upset about something you don't even bother to call and clarify before sending such a rude email".

So rude of him. I'm amazed that anyone thinks he is justified in sending you that email. What an ungrateful person. Are you planning to replying?

I'd be willing to bet his wife did it... at least until your update about not being close. I believe the references to your children's activity was about pointing out they pay attention to your childrens development and you don't to theirs. Probably also about sending gifts for your 2 kids and they only have 1.

Oh dear. I am so sorry. I do feel for you - my 10yr old dd wears size 12/13 yr old sizes. She's tall.

You were thoughtful. They are vile. Tell 'em to get fucked.

I came on here to write exactly what FightOrFlight wrote. My 4 year old is tiny and one side of my family always buy the next size up clothes, which he won't fit into for another 2 years. We always say thank you but it's annoying when you have to store it for that long and your DC gets upset because they can't wear their new clothes without tripping over the hems

Send the springloaded glitter bomb that oneuponatime linked to. Please!

Or moon sand. Or a drum kit. Or a recorder.

Wanker

Sorry, I see that you did respond. He sounds awful.

It's a rude and weird email, but maybe he thinks you've forgotton how old your nephew is?! That's the only reason I can see for massive offence. Do you see him often?

Are the clothes RL?

Because if so I would of fully understood! My sons not yet 3 and already in 4T due to them running small and him being a bit tall!

Total overreaction

Maybe he thinks you are suggesting his son is fat? Or maybe the boy got upset in opening a present to find clothes that don't fit him now instead of a toy? Either way all a bit weird and there are worse things in the world to dread!

I chuckled at dread though! My son loves getting clothes as presents

He can't be arsed exchanging presents any more is the real reason behind the email.

I should add that my Dd had a furry gillet made for a 6 year old that she wore from the age of 2 to the age of 9!!!!!

If you explained why you bought those sizes and their point of view didn't change, I would just move on and not buy them any more presents as they requested.

That email he sent you was loaded with mean and unnecessary comments. No one needs those kind of emails.