I do think it's a shame that he's never seen the need to attend his children's parent teacher consultations.
I didn't say he's never attends, I said he doesn't need to worry about rushing home early. Sometimes he attends, mostly he doesn't. Whenever we've had any particular concerns and felt that a show of solidarity was necessary then he has attended. But if he'd had a busy week or a last minute late meeting (which was often) he was never torn about what to do. Life just wasn't complicated for us like that. Those things were taken care of by me and he didn't need to split himself every which way. These days his schedule is less hectic but it really doesn't need two of us to sit there and hear the same thing from the teacher. I can listen/speak and relay the important bits of the conversation perfectly efficiently. That should not be construed as my DH not caring about DS's schooling.
I was a latchkey kid and hated it.
So was I, and so did I. I was the child who could never do anything/go anywhere because my mum was at work and my mum was never present for anything (sports days etc) because she was always at work, and rarely took me anywhere (outings at weekends, EC clubs etc) because she was always too tired from work. My Dad was not in the picture. My memories of my childhood were of childminders (some of whom were not very nice at all) my DSis and I being left on our own a lot with a box of crisps and the telly for company, being expected to care for my younger sister while I was still quite young myself, my mum sleeping half the day at weekends because she was knackered, and being left to our own devices if we were ill or it was the school holidays.
We've never had the financial need for us to both work, (I am lucky and I know it) so I wanted it to be different (better) for my DCs, and easier for me and DH to make sure the children's needs were always our priority.
I would HATE having to scrabble around constantly finding friends and relatives to palm them off onto when something unexpected happens like a teacher strike, or a late meeting. I have had many of the DCs friends here over the years because their parents have got into a muddle with work and childcare, and frankly (while I'm always happy to help in a genuine emergency) some of them have just cynically exploited the fact that I am always at home, they're only ever interested in me when they need me to look after their child and never invite my child back because they can't be bothered with playdates and sleepovers when they work full time. It's so transparent and one sided it really pisses me off. I made my choice, their choice is not my problem.
I consider it an equal partnership.
So do I. So does he. We just have very different roles and responsibilities within our partnership, that's all. One is not necessarily superior to the other. His having a demanding career has had upsides and downsides for him, as has my choice to be a SAHM for me. But overall it's all worked very well for the family as a whole.
I can't imagine sending DH out to work all hours…
Is it better that both parents are out 'all hours' in the interests of 'fairness' then? 
If you both have the kind of job where you work in fairly straightforward and undemanding roles where you can always leave bang on time, and you work fairly locally then I guess it works out fine to both be working. But in my case my DH always had a very demanding and unpredictable job involving a long commute, frequent short notice business travel etc., and you can't both have that, at least not without it impacting significantly on your (and your children's) quality of life. There are choices to be made and we made ours. If you are happy with your choice and it works for you then that's fine too.
Given that I was only ever going to earn a fraction of what he did, what would be the point in complicating our lives and adding another layer of stress by me fannying about in some minor hobby job just to keep me off the streets and make me feel better about 'contributing to society', if it meant I had to ferry children to childminders before school or pay a nanny and pay someone to walk the dogs, and constantly ship them off to holiday clubs that they really didn't want to go to?
Who really enjoys having to cram so much into their weekend time when they'd rather be relaxing and having fun? Who really enjoys dragging their children around the supermarket during evenings and weekends? Who really enjoys ironing school uniform at 10pm when they are knackered? Who really enjoys having to drag their children out of bed really early to get them to the childminder, eating a bowl of dry cereal on the lap in the car? Who really enjoys having to suck up to acquaintances (who know exactly what you are doing by the way) when your childcare falls through and you need a favour?
I can't imagine….him never being part of DS's life.
DH has always been a huge part of the DC's life. It was him that took DS2 to Sunday league football every weekend for ten years for example. He got on the train and went to London and came back each night. He didn't get into a space rocket and go to the moon for a year at a time. 
These days he works closer to home and has a much shorter day but the kids are older now and never at home anyway! My kids would laugh at the idea that him going to work full time while their I stayed at home meant he was not a part of their life. That's a 1950's cliche and nothing could be further from the truth.
I hear working women whinging constantly on here about how tough it is to fulfil all their obligations and how tired and frazzled they are. I've had many a frazzled moment as a SAHM obviously, but that feeling of being pulled in every direction, spinning plates and always having to compromise on something just hasn't ever happened to me in the same way, and I'm eternally grateful for that.
The price I've paid for being at home all these years is that I am now not especially employable unless I want to go and do minimum wage, uninspiring stuff, which I don't. And why should I, if I don't need to?
DH doesn't resent it in the least - he knows exactly how hard I worked when the children were younger - I've done my time. I've overseen the major renovation of two houses, dealt with the research for going into Buy To Let, (which has made us a pretty penny that I consider to be my contribution to our income, because without me driving it, it would not have happened at all) I've walked the dogs PROPERLY, run the home, fed us all well on home cooked food, I've done a school run that totalled 40 miles a day, I've twiddled my thumbs at endless week night football training sessions and drama clubs for years on end, and I've taken lots of crap off his plate over the years which has made it easier for him to give 100% at work. I don't feel like a sponger in the least.