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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think being sahm to 2 primary aged kids is the life of Reilly?

418 replies

Mummyusername · 21/01/2015 11:41

Just that really. My youngest will start school soon and Im imagining having the perfect combo of me time and then kids' hubbub after school.
Just wondering if I'm missing something though as when working I imagined having way more time on my hands when at home than I actually seem to have?

OP posts:
Baddz · 23/01/2015 12:55

Me too morethan.
Must go...Dh wants to go to ikea.
Sigh.

BlinkingHeck · 23/01/2015 12:55

It is not really the life of Reilly, I tried it for six months after leaving my CM job. It was ok, but I had all sorts of things I wanted to do but just never got round to it. I'll do it later/ tomorrow!

I love my life now as a foundation stage TA. It's a great work life balance. Busy all day, no work to bring home & no childcare costs as it is at my children's school. Oh and school holidays off.

I had a Lovely six months off, but it was boring at times! Not really the life of Reilly for me as I was lonely as all my mates work.

pommedeterre · 23/01/2015 12:59

Yanbu

I would definitely put on about two stone!

CurlyRedHairNow · 23/01/2015 13:03

I'm the opposite with weight. When I was a single parent on benefits, I did a fitness blender or a fitness dvd nearly every day. I had time to be cutting up onions and red peppers. Now that I'm working I get home and can't be fagged washing a courgette and grating a carrot never mind exercising. The curry house is on speed dial and my kids are shouting in their orders as well....... Blush

I don't want to lose my job but a small part of me thinks, I could lose those ten pounds again!!

pommedeterre · 23/01/2015 13:03

I would point out that I am massively grateful to the sahm who help with reading etc in the classroom. That's hugely valuable to the community.

pommedeterre · 23/01/2015 13:04

Unless I'm super busy and running round like a blue arsed fly I'm snacking!

Currently I am super busy - today feels like a lazy day as no work or nusery for the two littlies - just school run for the eldest!

Baddz · 23/01/2015 13:11

I feel my work has value. I'm not paid for it, of course!
I am a volunteer ambulance driver (was out all yesterday afternoon)
I am a school volunteer. (I'm in next week)
I look after my mum who is frail. (Was at the dr with her yesterday at 8.50 am)
I used to be the secretary to the parish council.
My days seem quite busy tbh.

Stinkle · 23/01/2015 13:15

When I was little and complained to my mum about being bored she would say "only boring people get bored"

Grin same here!

To be honest, I was bored stiff when I was at work.

I've been out for a lovely long walk with the dog, took my camera with me, and had a whale of a time. Stuck the hoover round, cleaned the bathrooms, chucked dinner in the slow cooker and bunged a wash load on, I'm just having some lunch and then I'm off to school to listen to reading.

I can't imaging being bored.

And, yes, I am busy. I'm not stressed and I'm not rushing around like a blue arsed fly "OMG I am soooo busy" busy, but my days are full

morethanpotatoprints · 23/01/2015 13:19

I think we all have lazy and busy days whether woh or sah, although there is more potential to be lazy if sahp and dc are at school.
Not saying that anybody is lazy btw, well except for me.

Sometimes I am busy because there is a lot of stuff to do on a particular day, but other days are relaxed and chilled. I like having a balance between the two.
This morning I have been sorting out HMRC, tax credits and so many problems with them. It has taken me from about 9pm until joining this thread, hate to think of doing this after a days work.

Baddz · 23/01/2015 13:24

I am having a lazy day today
I don't feel well and have had 2 really bad nights.
Despite that I have still pottered around the house and managed to get a few jobs done.
I am not going to bloody ikea though!
Dh will do the school pick up today as he is home

gamerchick · 23/01/2015 13:25

I think it's mint me Grin I don't work school hours so have 6 glorious a day when the kids are at school to do whatever. Today has been spent doing a smidgen of decorating . . Cleaning, laundry, chucking shit in the slow cooker and now I'm going to settle with the xbox until school pick up.
What could be better than that?

gamerchick · 23/01/2015 13:25

*hours

Stinkle · 23/01/2015 13:28

To be honest, left to my own devices, I am exceptionally lazy Grin

I'm quite happy when I'm mouldering on the couch watching tripe on the TV followed by a nice nap, then a bit more tripe on the telly.

But even I get bored eventually, and I get restless and fidgety in the evenings if I've done bugger all all day

MrsSchadenfreude · 23/01/2015 13:31

From Paris - I would say that most of the wives with this attitude were expat wives, or to a similar extent, military wives.

I can't think of anything more boring than going to a school assembly. I've made it to all significant school events - school plays, parents' evening (which is never in the evening), football matches etc etc. I've also listened to children read (I wonder how many working fathers do this?), and always bake cakes for a bake sale (it takes 10 minutes to rustle up a tray of muffins or a tray bake, and 15 minutes to cook them - easily done in the morning or evening). I have lied about my attendance at things like Harvest Festival, in a packed church, so they would never have seen me - "Behind the pillar darling! Behind the vicar's wife, and you know how tall she is!" and kept being there for more important events.

I did absolutely love the SAHMs I met when we were living in a village in the middle of nowhere. They used to go round to someone's house after drop off, drink coffee till 11, when the wine came out, have pizza and chips with more wine and a few spliffs and then wander back to school for pick up at 3. Grin But I couldn't have managed it every day! Grin

morethanpotatoprints · 23/01/2015 13:32

Baddz

No Ikea? You are letting the side down. Grin
That place makes me sick tbh, its the lack of air and windows.
I panic as can never find my way out, God help anyone in an emergency.

I don't even have to do a school run as dd is at home, although at times I do miss the early morning walk.
She is having a bath atm but will have to tackle some Maths/English if she ever stops practising her music Grin

She may go to boarding school in September, I still don't think I'll get a job.
May volunteer a day or something, but can't do paid work, not allowed.

morethanpotatoprints · 23/01/2015 13:35

Mrs

We lived in the country for a while.
I love your post and the lying is brilliant, what a great idea. Grin

Artandco · 23/01/2015 13:38

Lady - we do both. Dh and I are both head of our companies so have flexibility on when we work a little. But also have children to take care of and home etc.

ie today I worked 5am-8.30am at home ( covered different time zone), took ds1 to school, ds2 nursery. 9.30-11.30am I was in the office for quick meeting. Then collected ds2 from nursery, dropped him with dh in his office ( toddler will nap few hrs there). , back in office by midday. just stopped for lunch 30mins.
3.30pm dh will collect ds1 from school and take both home today and entertain/ homework/ house, il work until 7pm. Once home il take over children again and dh will go into home office until about 11pm.

Between us children also eat, homework done, chores sorted, muffins made. If school plays etc we will both work super early when children still in bed, then until late in night to catch up, so we can still attend.

morethanpotatoprints · 23/01/2015 13:53

Art

Do you and dh get any time together? Do you have any time for yourself.
It all sounds very tiring.
It's great you have the flexibility.
even though I don't woh I am a company director, in name, and help dh in the business sometimes.
It was great when dc were little as like you we could fit everything in.

Baddz · 23/01/2015 14:02

Im just not up to it today morethan....sorry :)

fromparistoberlin73 · 23/01/2015 14:06

I also think that maybe sahm have cleaner houses ! If I was one I can guarantee that

Bedding weekly
Towels weekly
Decent clean ( as opposed to wet wipes)
Tidier and better organised
Gardening !!! Would love to garden more

I don't mind doing the above . But on my Saturday ? Fuck that !!!

Agree very good sane and non argumentative thread let's keep it so

Baddz · 23/01/2015 14:13

House wise...
I do bedding weekly.
Wash quite a lot as I have 2 dc and one who plays football so 2 muddy football kits per week, 2 x PE kits per week.
I Hoover twice a week and dust. (Asthmatic dc and Dh)
Iron once a week - my most hated job. (I have a bad back)
Loos and bathroom weekly
Bins etc changing handtowels twice a week.
Add in the grocery shopping (oh how I would love to get it delivered!!) and my volunteering and it adds up.
I always seem busy.

Baddz · 23/01/2015 14:13

Oh! And school run x 2 :)

ThatBloodyWoman · 23/01/2015 14:18

I'd love to be at home all day every day while the dc's are at school.
The thought of gardening,long dog walks,bike rides etc.....

TwatFaceBitch · 23/01/2015 14:25

OMG so if sahms arn't washing there towels everyday Shock who the hell does?Wink

TwatFaceBitch · 23/01/2015 14:26

GrinWink

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