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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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To tell my friend I don't want to look after her DC's anymore

790 replies

evmil · 12/01/2015 13:51

I have a friend who has a full time job and quite unreliable childcare (she has aupairs but has quite a high turnover of them). She has three boys, one the same age as my DS(4) and two school age (7 and 10) and when her normal childcare falls through she asks me. Her aupair left just after christmas so since the start of term i have had her kids before school and after school Monday thru to Friday.

I looked after her kids for her yesterday as she said she needed to catch up on work. They were supposed to be here from 9 until 12ish but didn't leave until quarter past 7 last night. I was annoyed as I was supposed to be taking DSS3 somewhere but couldn't and he had to get a cab in the end and was late (DH is away so couldn't take him - i did tell her this).

Anyway, i got a text last night at about half 8 from said friend telling me she wasn't happy. I had apparently filled her kids up with junk food (we make milkshakes and biscuits and they got to try some and i sent some home with them), hadn't given them a proper dinner, they had jacket potatoes, which meant they were going to bed hungry, and I had let them play with the nerf guns and they had a go on the x-box (none of which she was happy with). She finished the text with 'i thought i could trust you to look after my boys'

I was really upset but just replied with 'perhaps it is best then if you get someone else to look after them', she didn't reply but i assumed this meant i wouldn't be having her kid anymore, but at quarter past 7 this morning she turned up at my house with them and said I'm not happy about yesterday but I am willing to give you another chance!! I didn't say anything as i didn't want to upset the boys but seriously!!

Like I said I enjoy having her kids and i know she is stuck for childcare but she doesn't pay me and i feel really under appreciated (i don't expect money, a thank you would be nice though!)

WIBU to tell her i don't want to look after her kids again because of her behaviour?

OP posts:
LaLyra · 12/01/2015 19:01

£5 says she claims phone problems and didn't get the text.

Either when she arrives tonight, pretends to be oblivious and then plays the 'but I can't have time off work with no notice card' or in the morning when she just turns up with the boys.

McKayz · 12/01/2015 19:01

Sandstorm haven't you just linked back to this thread? Confused

SandStorm · 12/01/2015 19:02

Sorry, here

SandStorm · 12/01/2015 19:03

Actually, ignore me, I think they may just be very similar (it's been a long day)

McKayz · 12/01/2015 19:04

They're different stories Sandstorm I think. Different number of children and ages.

davejudgement · 12/01/2015 19:05

That's a different thread on similar subject of piss takey people

thetroubleis · 12/01/2015 19:05

Sandstorm I thought there was a tear in the space/time continuum!

Mintyy · 12/01/2015 19:06

Good lord!

CaptainAnkles · 12/01/2015 19:07

Good point re her just turning up tomorrow and claiming she never got the message. Can you leave your house way earlier than usual or hide in a cupboard OP? Grin

GaryBaldy · 12/01/2015 19:07

Yes I've met lots of entitled people so can well believe this.

Good on you OP

OhShittingHenry · 12/01/2015 19:08

ohbollocks2u Mon 12-Jan-15 19:00:49

Slightly off the point but how do you bookmark on here ?

Top of page, Customise (left hand side), scroll down, shitload of options and it's there near the bottom but please note -

The following options only apply to the "Mumnset New" Talk style. Changing them will have no effect if you choose "Muted", "Classic" or "Sober" as your Talk theme. Bookmark links are not compatible with Internet Explorer 6 or older.

BurningBridges · 12/01/2015 19:08

Surely she's turned up to collect children by now? Or is she punishing the OP by leaving them there overnight?!

TidyDancer · 12/01/2015 19:08

Oh dear. Those of you who know me know I have a cousin like this. If it wasn't for the fact that there are multiple DCs involved I would've thought it was her. Sadly this is very believable. There are too many arseholes out there. Any update, op?

SandStorm · 12/01/2015 19:09

Sorry - didn't mean to confuse anyone (mostly me!) Now I shall have to follow both threads.

McKayz · 12/01/2015 19:09

Was it your cousin who expected you to decorate her wedding venue Tidy? Or am I thinking of someone else?

Stealthpolarbear · 12/01/2015 19:10

I think liftzilla turned out to be an ahem

BurningBridges · 12/01/2015 19:11

Bridezilla?

Mintyy · 12/01/2015 19:12

Not really Stealthy? [shocked].

It was all so incredibly detailed and plausible.

Itsgoingtoreindeer · 12/01/2015 19:14

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YouTheCat · 12/01/2015 19:14

Liftzilla got deleted because 'it was all a dream'... Grin

amothersplaceisinthewrong · 12/01/2015 19:14

OP

You have in best Mumsnet style told her to "fuck off to the far side of fuck", haven't you

MadameJulienBaptiste · 12/01/2015 19:14

Have to mark my place too.

Last year a good friend practically forced £8 a day on me for 3 months - for simply walking her lovely son home with us and he playet nicely with my two till she picked him up at 6. While her mum (who usually did the childcare) was seriously ill then having major surgery/recuperating.

because she didn't want me to think she was taking the piss.

I spent it on a caravan break for her later on when her mother was better. Because if someone is so keen not to be seen as taking the pee then I don't mind doing them favours.

Fanfeckintastic · 12/01/2015 19:14

Been lurking all day in work, now on the edge of my seat at homeBlush

Sonnet · 12/01/2015 19:17

Come on OP....

notapizzaeater · 12/01/2015 19:17

I'd turn up at her house tomorrow with your kids for her to return the favour. How can some people be so think skinned