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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to say "I will not return the fish knives."

161 replies

Alchemist · 10/01/2015 18:37

STBXH and I split over a year ago. Things have moved on, divorce going through and I am in a much better place altogether.

H's family haven't contacted me or DC for approx 8 months after a couple of very uncomfortable conversations with MIL and SIL. I told SIL to Fuck Off and I was not repentant.

So, today I receive a call from MIL:

Me: Hello
MIL: I want the fish knives back. You must return them, they are mine.
Me: Erm
MIL: I am in and I want them. I want them today.
Me: I'm out today but you could call next week? Or H could pick them up when he next has DCs?

MIL: I want them today! You must bring them to my house!
Me: I will not return the fish knives. Goodbye.

I know MIL and she must have been stewing for months before the dramatic fish knives call. This makes me smile.

So, AIBU to say "I will not return the fish knives".

Grin
OP posts:
balia · 10/01/2015 19:00

Dear MIL,

I couldn't bring myself to tell you over the phone, but STBXH binned the fish knives as he said they were crappy old tat that only a pretentious twat would ever imagine he wanted. He did do a really good impression of you complete with convincing cats bum mouth as he tipped them into the bin so at least we had a good laugh out of it. I'm sure he'll replace them for you.

Much love, Alchemist

LeftyLucy · 10/01/2015 19:03

I was in a bit of a crap mood till I read this thread. Thanks everyone.
Oh and YANBU. Smile

MaryWestmacott · 10/01/2015 19:03

YANBU!

However, next time your exH turns up to collect the dcs, give him the fish knives with a "I'm sure your mum had told you she needs these." You get to have the moral high ground, and at the same time, confuse your ex, and force him to have a fish knife related conversation with his clearly bonkers mum. Grin

IAmNotAPrincessIAmAKahleesi · 10/01/2015 19:04

Please please don't give her back the fish knives Grin

They were a gift and as she has been so incredibly rude you shouldn't reward her behaviour

If you wanted to be nice then Giving them to a charity shop of your choice would be very kind of you Wink

HolyDrinker · 10/01/2015 19:06

Please send her a text asking her to "stop carping on about the fish knives for cod's hake. You're sick of herring about them. You've bream krilling yourself looking for them all afternoon but can't find them. She must have lent them to salmon else. Etc."

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 10/01/2015 19:07

She sounds a right old trout op. You're well rid.

Let's hope she's not perched outside your house right now.

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 10/01/2015 19:08

What krill you do op?

HolyDrinker · 10/01/2015 19:08

Yeah, I hope she doesn't try and batter you op.

HolyDrinker · 10/01/2015 19:10

If you need back up, let minnow.

AwfulBeryl · 10/01/2015 19:12

I don't think you should feel gill-ty about keeping them, she was awfully rude.

Scrounger · 10/01/2015 19:12

Will she keep carping on about them? Get STBX to pike them up.

Hatespiders · 10/01/2015 19:12

Grin Grin Grin at all the fish puns!

TheReluctantCountess · 10/01/2015 19:15

Tell her you sold them to buy food for her grandchildren.

VenusRising · 10/01/2015 19:15

These knives are bargaining chips.

Exchange them for something you want from your x!

HolyDrinker · 10/01/2015 19:16

She's probably just using this oppor-tuna-ty to get them back. She needs to scale back her aggressive approach though.

CatsClaus · 10/01/2015 19:16

tell her the ex has half of them

and are there no fish forks to go with...how odd?

Only1scoop · 10/01/2015 19:17

Won't make any 'bones' about this....

On a 'scale' of 1 to 10....

You are not being unreasonable

H needs to get his bass around to collect em.

Or just give em all the 'fish' finger Smile

CatsClaus · 10/01/2015 19:17

holy ...you missed one...ROACH, also a fish.

Greywackejones · 10/01/2015 19:19

You could write a travel blog about where fish knives end up each week....

joanne1947 · 10/01/2015 19:21

I posted the suggestion that as they are fish knives you should throw them into a deep river or ocean so they are near the fish. You could tell MIL where they are and invite her to dive in and collect them. (my previous post was a little stronger on the character of your MIL and got removed so this time I will behave) I will never post offensive posts in future

Seff · 10/01/2015 19:23

Ha, love this thread!

Pictures on facebook of the kids eating fish fingers with them?

MovingOnUpMovingOnOut · 10/01/2015 19:24

Pictures of the kids using playing with play dough and digging in the garden with them.

TheSpottedZebra · 10/01/2015 19:26

Make her dance for them. A different dance, for 6/8/12 weeks. Like a fish knife version of Strictly.

RichTeas · 10/01/2015 19:26

If you don't want them, give them back FFS. Anything you can do to clear the "connection" between you and them is beneficial. No need to play games.

PacificDogwood · 10/01/2015 19:31

I have a set of fish knives in my eves.

I wonder whether your MiL might want them?
I certainly have no use for them.

Oh, and for record, YANBU Grin