To ask if anyone is setting up a fb page to discuss Tricky Dicky?

[IAmOnMyBike]

It seems we are not allowed to speak about anything negative elsewhere. Please do not speak badly of Tricky Dicky and co.

different

I second Andrea's post.

Offering a refund then holding the person asking for one up to ridicule and abuse? That's really rather like not offering a refund in the first place!

I certainly don't condone the attacks on the parents but imho you can't set about begging for donations and expect people to put their hands in their pockets no questions asked.

Yes it should be questioned because it was a very public request and saying nothing prays on some peoples naivety and gives other unscrupulous people ideas. This couple aren't the first to find themselves in this kind of situation and have consulates, charities, insurance companies and travel agents to advise them of their options. Their 'friend' could have chosen to research their options for them but instead decided to add money into the mix and make it a very public situation. He could have chosen to only contact friends and family for cash but he didn't. Frankly if you ask you should be prepared to answer. Getting shitty with people makes people (rightly) suspicious and leads to this kind of situation.

Until I'm proved wrong I think the parents themselves have little to nothing to do with this and wonder if they've seen a penny of this money yet and if/when they do whether it'll be managed appropriately and not lead to further financial hardship for them.

bananaramadramallama If you have pointed that put to him, privately, then you have done what you can. It may be that he has had 100s of messages & can't read them all.

People don't deserve to be hounded for not donating, but I also don't think he, or the parents deserve to be hounded for asking for help.

This has been turned into a circus, both here & on fb.

It's disgusting on many accounts, from all sides.

different

The father hadn't hidden his profile, it was still very much public for all to see. The instructions on how to find it were because the poster didn't want to post a direct link.

It is now made private, not public.

One thing I did notice (yes I looked at his profile!) was that the fundraiser told him about the FB page/fundraiser on 30th December and linked to the page. Days later he was claiming that the parents knew nothing about either the page or the fundraiser. Just one of many yes-no-maybe situations that have changed over the days. It's things like that which make me doubt the veracity of his other claims.

Giving details instructions as to how to access the fathers profile (after he hid it)
Pulling apart their spending habits
Criticising her for flying while pregnant
Criticising them for not having the correct insurance
Searching his profile for proof of their financial status

...if that is constructive, considered critique, I'd hate to see what your version of digging for info is.

Woah!

I didn't list, condone or describe those things in that way. I haven't seen any of those things myself.

You are more than a bit over the line different

AndreaDislikesScammers You are incorrect. A poster wanted to access his profile, and said they couldn't find it.

Another poster gave detailed instructions as to who to click on, which friend to look for & then how to get to his profile.

Nothing was mentioned of links.

I can see the person mentioned upthread getting personal about appearance, however.

Yes it has become a circus. However the employer is the one who set up the big top. This has been handled badly from the beginning IMO, and if he wants to salvage anything at all, he needs to shut it down quickly and donate most if not all of the donated funds to established charities.

ArsenicFaceCream

Where did I say YOU said any of that? I was putting down examples of what I have seen on this & the deleted thread after you said you saw it as only considered critique.

different

Actually I'm not incorrect. His profile was still public it was just that the poster couldn't find the right LJ.

The other poster who gave that advice said they didn't want to post the link in case it got the thread removed.

Unless we are talking about two different requests of course.

He set up the big top, yes. So does that make everyone else the clowns? Because that is how people are behaving.

This stopped being about that baby a long time ago & became a lot more about his & the parents downfall.

Yet no one that I know has told the police of their concerns.

Read back your post different. It it phrased as though I have seen those things and am defending.

You can't condemn the entire effort to interrogate the 'fundraising' because 2 or 3 people have said some stupid things.

You're assuming everyone has seen and read the same corners of rge same threads on the same groups that you have.

AndreaDislikesScammers

It's possible, this set of instructions gave a name of who to look for in order to access his profile.

ArsenicFaceCream

So do you still consider it constructive critique?

I don't think I implied that you agreed with any of it, but I am happy to extend my apologies if my post reads like that!

different

The poster was advised to go via a relative or friend's account and find him that way as they did not want to post a direct link.

If the profile was 'hidden' then you wouldn't have been able to access it with a direct link or indirect 'sleuthing'. The profile was still public at that time and remained so for quite a while afterwards.

Actually different most of us are either bystanders or people who have donated and unhappy with being encouraged to donate under false pretences. I have been perfectly civil to you, I haven't called you names or said anything dreadful.

As far as police involvement, yes, there have actually been a few people that have stated they are reporting it for obtaining money by fraud. So there's every possibility it will be followed up. We'll see, I guess.

I certainly don't wish any distress on the parents at this time, but I cannot see how this will change direction until they step up and call a halt to the whole thing, as the employer does not seem likely to do so.

For the record here is the latest update on the official page (please feel free to delete my post if I'm not allowed to post it)

"Thank you to all that have donated so far! Also thanks for all the 100's of messages of support that continue to come through. Over £11,500 has now been raised so I would imagine there will be a sizeable donation that will be able to be made! There are lots of very kind and generous people out there. For anybody that would also like to donate directly to the RMF charity are more than welcome to do so (not that people need telling as they can think for themselves) , but here is the link! This is where all excess money will be going to anyway so if you wish to go direct thats great."

So he is still asking for money for 'expenses' and is very unclear as to what the donation to charity will be. From what he's posted the 'sizeable donation' could be.... Anything.

The correct thing would have been to thank everyone for their financial support on behalf of the parents and announce that they are shutting down their fundraising and instead encourage people to donate directly to RMF/Bliss etc.

If I wanted to give to a legitimate charity I would want my money to be sent straight through to them.
As it is people have no idea what their money will buy/support.

Is there any accountability?

He wasn't transparent at the start but we know that a.) medical bills have been covered and b.) they're asking for living expenses. If people want to continue to donate without doing any further research, than that is their choice.

It will change direction when & if people stop looking for information to bring them down.

If you are unhappy & have donated, have been threatened etc...contact your local police. Stop trying to find that hidden gem that will make you (general you, not you personally) the hero of the hour by bringing it to it's knees.

AndreaDislikesScammers Fair enough that his profile was not hidden, but how does that make it OK for name a relative on here, as a means to getting into his account?

different I'm sure you can see what I'm saying elsewhere

Well it's just like a massive whip round in the pub. It's up to individuals to decide how they spend their money. If they decide to gift it to this couple them that's their business.

I know you all think you have some unique insight into what is going on - but the donors see it too and they don't seem to mind.

I haven't donated because I don't think the parents really need the money - but plenty of others will see if differently.