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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Help me out here/ urgent

209 replies

Kab13 · 31/12/2014 12:29

At a soft play, 90% sure there's aan taking photos of random children. Seem him sat on his phone with camera on. Told the managers don't seem to be doing much .
Not sure if he got a shot of my dd who ran infront of him. He's acting very shifty.
What do I do?
He's here with his son...

OP posts:
vestandknickers · 31/12/2014 13:23

Poor man. I hope he wasn't aware of these stupid mothers and their conspiracy theories. He was probably just bored and mucking about on his phone.

Bananayellow · 31/12/2014 13:24

I'm sure if he was innocent he'd rather show what he was doing rather than think several people are thinking the worst and not saying anything.

The management should say something to him. Rather a bit of embarrassment than the alternative.

WowserBowser · 31/12/2014 13:25

WHAT IS THE ALTERNATIVE??

Please someone answer what the worry is?

emotionsecho · 31/12/2014 13:25

If you thought he was taking photos of your child why not just ask him? Humans have verbal communication skills, you ask and receive answers and can then act upon the information given in the response - it's a truly remarkable facet of evolution, so much more effective than peering over someone's shoulder and jumping to conclusions which include labelling someone as odd.

Alisvolatpropiis · 31/12/2014 13:26

Banana

"A bit of embarrassment"

I think the poor bloke would have been more than "a bit embarrassed".

shovetheholly · 31/12/2014 13:26

I think you should have pointed to him and screamed, and then when everyone went silent and turned around to stare, you should have run over, belted him with your handbag and then rugby-tackled him to the floor while yelling 'PAEDO!' at the top of your voice.

Some people might argue that this is an overreaction, but they are clearly just not in tune with the creepy 'vibes' that sensitive souls like yourself can feel.

fluffling · 31/12/2014 13:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LongDistanceLove · 31/12/2014 13:32

To be honest it sounds as though you are pissed off that other posters on the thread haven't said 'hogtie the fucker and burn him alive he's obviously a paedo'

From what you have have posted, you think he's up to something dodge, you think he's weird. You have voiced your concerns to the staff, who don't see any cause for concern. As other posters have said, your other option at the time was to ask him what he was doing, but you didn't, which is ok btw.

SantasBassoon · 31/12/2014 13:44

I think 'mother's instinct' would have compelled you to challenge what you genuinely thought was a menace to children. You couldn't just sit there dithering. What's he going to do? Argue with you? So what?

You've left believing there is a paedophile in a soft play area. You must feel like shit. Or perhaps you didn't really think he was that bad at all.

Littlemeg37 · 31/12/2014 13:45

Bloomin heck there's some nasty people on this thread .......... just saying! Shock

Think that's why I mainly read and don't post Xmas Hmm

greeneggsandjam · 31/12/2014 13:52

Much ado about nothing?

livingonaprayer1986 · 31/12/2014 14:25

My husband takes photos of our 3 year old in public places (park, soft play etc) but he ensures its just our daughter in the photo. It is rude to take photos of other peoples kids without asking first if your child happens to be in the same vicinity assomeoneelses (eg on swings maybe or a roundabout)

So I can see why OP would be annoyed if she thought soneone was taking photos of their child even if it was the fact its just a dad taking photos of his son having fun.

Ide ask him outright if you are that concerned. Just say "hi there, I'm i can see ur taking photos if your son, but can I just ask are you taking photos of * its just I don't want them to be on any sosial media sites like fb" and see what he says.

livingonaprayer1986 · 31/12/2014 14:27

can I just ask is my son in any of those photos as I dont want them to be on any sosial media sites I.e fb

Oceanpurple · 31/12/2014 14:29

You would think the op was suggesting a full scale 'paedogeddon' aka Brass Eye.
Op, if you are truly concerned then delete this thread and report to 111.

I think we all need some Wine

fluffling · 31/12/2014 14:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WowserBowser · 31/12/2014 14:41

What do you think the NHS will do about it Ocean ? Wink

WowserBowser · 31/12/2014 14:41

Slow ass cross post there

Oceanpurple · 31/12/2014 14:47

Oh fuck I don't know why I suggested that.

Blush

Yeah, op, don't call 111. They'll think you're a nutter. As am I.

WowserBowser · 31/12/2014 14:48
Grin
Oceanpurple · 31/12/2014 14:52

I had it in my head that 111 was a non-émergence police nul et
Sorry op
My advice is shit

Oceanpurple · 31/12/2014 14:53

Ffs my keyboard switched to french halfway through
I am leaving now

violetlights · 31/12/2014 15:00

I'd like to stand up for the OP here. I don't think she's sexist or bonkers. As she's said, she's often encountered Dads at soft play etc and hasn't battered an eyelid. Her instinct told her there was something up with this guy.

Something similar happened with me a couple of times (once with pedophile - sp??) . After contacting the authorities turned out I was right. I'm not saying OP is right, but neither is she. She said she had a feeling something was wrong and came here for advice. Instead she got a lot of responses which were pretty close to mockery and bullying.

Certainly I wouldn't have thought a pedophile takes pics of fully clothed kids to perve. But might he not take pics for other reasons? Maybe my background makes me more fanciful but the perves who targeted school friends of mine sometimes worked in pairs or groups. I'm sure camera phones would have been a useful tool for them.

This guy probably was just minding his own business but I feel very sad that a level-headed woman should be flamed for listening to her instinct and seeking advice.

TheyThinkImCool · 31/12/2014 15:28

Kab13 I can see why you felt uncomfortable I would have felt the same way, I always avoid taking pictures of my boys in public places if there are a lot of other children around, every parent deserves privacy of their child and you never know where the picture(s) may end up.

Reddragon116 · 31/12/2014 15:37

How is having pictures of kids running around in a place supervised by their parents going to help paedophiles ? The management can't see anything wrong with his behaviour and yes op is entitled to trust her instincts ie watch her child and stop any interaction between her child and the man but anything else is actually stepping over boundaries which i bet if someone did to her husband she would be very upset - this could be the Dad/sons favourite place - imagine if her behaviour ruined this for them and they felf never able to return?

MrsDeVere · 31/12/2014 15:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.