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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Help me out here/ urgent

209 replies

Kab13 · 31/12/2014 12:29

At a soft play, 90% sure there's aan taking photos of random children. Seem him sat on his phone with camera on. Told the managers don't seem to be doing much .
Not sure if he got a shot of my dd who ran infront of him. He's acting very shifty.
What do I do?
He's here with his son...

OP posts:
BlueBrightBlue · 31/12/2014 13:07

OP hasn't called this man a peopdophile but has said he makes her and others uncomfortable.
I have seen just as many men as women at soft play centres; she is saying something doesn't sit right with his behaviour. IMO it is inappropriate to leave the camera on, it poses a breach of privacy.

TheReluctantCountess · 31/12/2014 13:07

A phone can make the camera clicky noise for other things, not just for taking pictures.
Could you just ask him if he's taking pictures?

MrsDeVere · 31/12/2014 13:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GothicRainbow · 31/12/2014 13:08

Why haven't you just approached the man and said 'i can see you are taking photos of the soft play area/children who are clearly not your own, please stop doing that.'

Doesn't take much and would save you having to be so over bloody dramatic about it all!!

TheReluctantCountess · 31/12/2014 13:08

Oh you're not there anymore.
Don't go back to ask him.

Original poster
Kab13 · 31/12/2014 13:08

I didn't say I left an hour ago... I continued posting after I left

OP posts:
MammaTJ · 31/12/2014 13:08

Hopefully he is taking selfies to post on FB about being in soft play hell!

SaucyJack · 31/12/2014 13:09

I doubt he's doing anything "dodgy" dodgy- there's probably more to look at in the swimwear section on the Mothercare website.

It's still out of order to take pictures of other people's kids tho. Even if he's practising photography or looking for shots to use for advertising or whatever reason he's doing it.

KatieKaye · 31/12/2014 13:09

We can't answer these questions because we aren't there.

But you are and your chosen method of dealing with this situation is a) to approach the management, who do not evict this man or call the police and b) to post about this on MN, rather than calling the police yourself and/or removing your child.

Why are you still there if you are so worried? Why is your DC still there is you are so concerned this man is taking photos to perve over later?

people who would think someone is taking photos of your child and others and say nothing! - Err, that would be you then, OP - wouldn't it? Because when management haven't acted you've not said anything to this man yourself, have you?

None of the above is being nasty - it is pointing out the truth. If you are so unhappy then either do something or leave. Don't keep posting on MN and then get ratty when there isn't a virtual mob with pitchforks.

Original poster
Kab13 · 31/12/2014 13:09

Okay. I've left. I was wrong. I'm sexist. I'm ott and I myself make men feel uncomfortable in soft play areas.
I'm a crazy, over the top mother.
Thanks for opening my eyes .
There's no longer an issue.
Thanks

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 31/12/2014 13:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FlowerFairy2014 · 31/12/2014 13:11

Thankfully we live in a country where you are free to take photos in public. Unless the venue chooses to ban it you have to tolerate it. If you don 't want your child photographed it could wear a load of head covering like Michael Jackson's children used to or you could keep it behind closed doors.

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 31/12/2014 13:11

Kab13 Wed 31-Dec-14 12:51:53 He's been there for at least an hour...

Apologies if I misunderstood OP but you said that. Did you mean that someone else told you he's been there all that time?

Coconutty · 31/12/2014 13:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PurpleWithRed · 31/12/2014 13:13

The managers should deal with this: either ask him what he's doing/to stop or tell you it's OK. They should call 101 though, which is the police line, not 111 which is health. Unless someone punches him in the goolies.

SaucyJack · 31/12/2014 13:14

My iPhone makes an audible "click" Coconutty- as does DP's Nokia that he got for Christmas last week.....

TheReluctantCountess · 31/12/2014 13:15

If he was taking photos that he shouldn't have been taking, he would have turned the click noise off.
I bet he was doing something else and it just looked odd.

soverylucky · 31/12/2014 13:15

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Alisvolatpropiis · 31/12/2014 13:17

He's not very stealthy if he left his phone on loud is he.

Bananayellow · 31/12/2014 13:18

Op is there. You can get a vibe in a situation that cannot be conveyed by words. Other women have found it odd. It might be perfectly ok but sometimes we should trust our instincts. Turning a blind eye just in case you are wrong can easily backfire.

I'm not sure you can do any more than inform the management in this case, but YANBU to be worried.

forumdonkey · 31/12/2014 13:18

Poor guy. He could be a single Dad who's got a new GF and sending selfies and texting them to her bored to tears on his own in a soft play centre.

WowserBowser · 31/12/2014 13:20

Backfire and what? No one seems to want to answer that question.

fluffling · 31/12/2014 13:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AlpacaYourThings · 31/12/2014 13:21

Threads like this really depress me.

Sad
forumdonkey · 31/12/2014 13:22

If it had been a woman doing this would you have been posting pedophile? The children are all appropriately dressed I assume and supervised by their parents.