help with the practical positives and negatives of formula feeding

[KnackeredMerrily]

I'm currently breastfeeding my week old but we are struggling with putting weight on and jaundice.

I've been here before with my first son, and the first months of his life with feeding him 20 times a day and expressing top up feeds. The idea of doing it again makes me want to curl up into a ball and weep.

But, I've never gone through the practicalities of formula feeding either. What is it like? How do you make feeds up in advance? Is it a fiddle travelling with bottles and keeping them warm and wondering how much they've had? Is one formula better than another?

I am well aware of the benefits of breastfeeding so I don't need to hear that slant. I'm just wondering what the day to day life is like when FF

OP, I understand completely. My DS2 is 12 weeks old. I tried my absolute hardest to breastfeed until I nearly had a breakdown. My DS2 who is 7, was formula feed. Anyway, after having a horrendous delivery, I had no help with breastfeeding in hospital, even though they had seen me in distress. I kept begging for someone to help me as I couldn't get DS2 to latch on properly and I was in complete agony (nevermind my third degree tears). All the midwives kept saying was practice makes perfect and it will be harder for me as I have large breasts... Once I got out of hospital, yet again the community midwives were no help, they just forced my nipple in the babies mouth and said to do that... Well I cried and cried, felt like a failure, tried using a pump, I could barely get enough milk for a feed. (At this point my nipples were bleeding and red raw, everytime DS was feeding on my nipple, it felt like someone was stabbing my nipple with a butchers knife repeatedly. Then for the cherry on top, thanks to being stuck in A&E for 7 hours waiting to get checked for a blood clot (under midwives request). That was the breaking point for me. I tried to explain to the staff I needed to get home to feed my baby as I was still establishing breastfeeding and my supply is low, it fell on deaths ears, I ended up getting mastitis. That was it, I had to formula feed, I never felt so low in my life. I asked, even begged for help from midwives, both on ward and community, let's not even mention the health visitor, she was as useful as a chocolate fire guard. Anyway OP the guilt eased off when I seen how happy my baby was to finally get enough milk, and for me, the stress, worry and guilt vanished. He is very healthy and loves his formula even though it's nutramigen!

Don't listen to the crazy bitches, who seem to think they are Mother Earth reincarnated!

Oops should've said DS1 who's 7 was FF.

Thanks everyone for your detailed responses. They have been incredibly helpful and I'm sorry that a little bun fight detracted from them. My DH and I have read through them all and felt so much calmer and less stressed at the thought of formula feeding. You make it sound so easy.

I am grateful that people would ask and check that I am being supported with breastfeeding, it is disgraceful when people have to give up because there is no help. It's why I volunteered and trained for breastfeeding peer support.

During my training I learnt that it helps to "signpost" to information rather than give it when it might not be welcome. Let someone know where to go rather than offer advice. Just a thought for when posting on other threads so they don't get so sidetracked.

There's no need to debate FF v BF - both have their benefits and negatives. I have to say that a lot of positives of breastfeeding mentioned on this thread were nothing related to my experience of breastfeeding, and I breastfed for 13 months first time round.

At the moment I am getting by with pumping and a little formula top up once or twice a day and we're happy. I am hopeful that baby will start to show more of an interest in breastfeeding as he gets older, and should he refuse long term I will happily switch to formula - I have the Perfect Prep machine all ready to go!

That's great, glad you've found a solution that you're happy with!

I BF DS (now aged three) for four weeks. I hated the constant grazing because it took 10-15 minutes just to get him to latch on properly. I switched to FF at a month old. I used Tommie tippee bottles, made all daytime feeds in advance, put them in the freezer and used the microwave to reheat them. You learn how many minutes per ounce is needed and voila, a feed in seconds. Did the same with night feeds and used a bottle warmer as we were upstairs. I didn't find it a faff at all. Bottles washed at the end of the day with tea dishes and then sterilised first thing in the morning with a microwave steriliser.
This time I am pregnant with DD. I am not against BF and am giving it another go this time round as DD may take better to it than DS. But if not, I am definitely buying a prep machine. Heard only great things about them.

I meant put the bottles in the fridge!

That's great OP. Thanks for coming back and sorry for the massive derailment

Can you explain what you mean by 'signposting' info rather than giving it please? I do like to provide support on the infant feeding boards where I can but don't want to wind anybody up accidentally!

Elphaba our instructor used the term, it just meant rather than offload all the information you know about something and overwhelm someone - you just 'signpost' to where they can go and get more help or information.

In this thread it would have been helpful for some of the posters to say "Sorry you are having difficulty breastfeeding, if you are having particular problems you could come over to the Feeding board and we can help you work through them."

Really pleased you've found a system that's working. DD was BF until she was 14mo but on the days I worked I sent her to the CM with cartons of formula (I was too lazy to express!). I found these super handy (if expensive) but as I wasn't using them every day it wasn't so bad. They're certainly handy for out and about and DD would have them without heating.

Just to echo what Neverbuy said below - C & G and Aptamil are indeed identical in formulation but Aptamil is much more expensive - it's a pure marketing ploy. We switched to C & G when we found out.