Posted before about a NYE wedding.
The venue has doubled in price. £5,500 for use of a mill, from 12 noon until 1am.
This would to be expected if they were hiring staff etc, but it's JUST for the venue.
The catering comes in a £2,546 for 80 guests. It's not that bad at all really. (IMO)
However from the start we've decided it's fairer to put our guests up at a local hotel ( premier inn) if we choose NYE, i don't think it's fair to expect people to pay either very expensive taxi fairs home (a lot of people are traveling) or to pay for a hotel and taxi fairs to a hotel.
We found a huge cottage, we wanted to hire this for 38 of our close family members and that's come in very pricey too as we have to hire it for 3 days over NYE. but that part, spending a couple of days with my loved ones was so important.
But, totalled it all up and it's about 22k BEFORE photography, linen, cutlery and crockery hire, flowers, invitations AND honeymoon.
I can see this costing 30k, and that is something that makes me feel guilty for.
A huge amount of that money is being spent on accommodation for our guests (6k and 80 guests inc children) but is feel unreasonable expecting others to cough up for it.
It's so much money but dp is set on NYE now.
Let the flamings begin.
AIBU?
To feel uneasy about spending 30k on a wedding
Kab13 · 01/12/2014 09:00
if you can afford it, I think it sounds lovely. and I don't thibk you need to pay for your guest accommodation BUT how thoughtful of you
Classic up thread along lines of "our weddoing only cost £6k and a photo was featured in Vogue 'cos we were just sooooo radiantly happy" 
I think it's a bit much tbh. I can't imagine that ANY day could be worth spending £30k on. Some of the best weddings I've been to have been very low cost, but it's your money so entirely your prerogative to spend this morning and of course I'm sure all the recipient's of the cash will be very pleased
I think it is v generous to consider paying for all of your guests accommodation but it is unnecessary. Any of your unmarried extended family would probably not appreciate the precedent either so think of it as a public service. They have a year to save for it or not come. You could arrange a bus service at 1am to take everyone to the Premier Inn which would be much appreciated I am sure.
The usual drop out rate is 10% which would also be quite irritating when you've loaded on costs of accommodation and transport too, on top of venue hire and food/booze.
Personally, I'd be inclined to find a venue with accommodation onsite as it would make life easier particularly for people who want to travel early and arrive the night before. I'd particularly look for a venue that include the cost of linen, cutlery and crockery hire in the price FFS. Talk about nickle and diming you! It must be an awfully nice mill. You could hire Eltham Palace for that sort of money.
Christmas time weddings are lovely imo but I can't see a lot of difference between 31st December or 1st Jan. Dry January just starts a day later and the poster up thread who pointed out that 1st Jan is a Friday next year had a good point. Plus many people have to work on 31st. But you could also do it on 28th December and get a Monday rate....
Whether you spend 30k or 3k is largely irrelevant and entirely dependent on whether you have better things to do with that sum of money. I had a very similar wedding to JackieBrambles but we did take out a small loan to cover unforeseen costs. We did regret that later as once the day is over it does huirt a bit to continue to pay for it. Lesson learned, do a very detailed budget plan and get quotes before you commit to venue and headcount.
I had an expensive wedding (25k ish) and don't regret it but we were lucky enough to be able to afford that and still buy our house, save towards pension/DCs etc. If it were wedding vs deposit or wedding vs helping out children later it would be no contest, I'd have a cheaper wedding.
Picture yourself in 5 or 10 years' time. Is it really going to be that important that you got married on NYE? Or is it going to be more important to have been able to spend a bit more on a place together or some other benefit that lasts a bit longer than one day?
(NYE is a crap date to have an anniversary as well IMO - you'll always have to choose between doing something the two of you or seeing friends).
Also, if you want to spend a few days with loved ones, I'd suggest doing it separately - the few days before a wedding are often filled with tedious chores and can be a bit stressful. Why not do a big family weekend a year or two later, not based around your wedding, and not at NYE , that way you have something to look forward to after wedding fever has worn off.
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
OP you sound really lovely.
Hope the mole is ok.
Go travelling if your DP is up for it. I spent £30k with my DH backpacking around the world for 3 years and don't regret a single bean. Much better use of the money if you really do feel that way inclined .
It's okay everyone! Shan't be spending 30k on a wedding at all after all! My wonderful in laws came home yesterday and called up dp at 10.30 shouting down the phone because we dirtied their doormat and forgot to put a beer can away! 
just a reminder that they are totally bonkers and will probably ruin whatever we plan!
Looks like a quick ceremony at the Roman baths and an evening meal it is!
I'd honestly hoped they had turned a corner ( this is literally the millionth time we've been screamed down the phone at for various pathetic things) but they are actually a bit odd!
Saves us some money! Just a shame I don't get to get married the way I wanted to. Either way, it's getting married that's the main thing and at least if we just do a reception meal and drinks me and dp still share the day with family.
What a stress.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.