To be shocked at the ageism on here tonight

[drudgetrudy]

AIBU to be shocked at the terms used to refer to older people tonight.
We've had "old duffers", "old biddies" "old dears with nothing better to do" and this isn't a TAAT-its been on more than one thread.

If any other group were referred to in generalised and negative terms like this people would be going nuts.
People are people and come in many varieties over all age ranges.
Seriously pissed off tonight.

Or do they think by some bloody miracle that they are never going to age?

Well the alternative to not ageing wouldn't be so good!

I am cheered to hear so many others being appalled by ageism. If we all report every time we see it, maybe it will help.

It always cheers me up to think that not only will they get old ( as you say, magi the alternative is not good) many will be MILs too!

@Mehitabel6

Maybe we need to report more. Looking back I see plenty of 'old cow', 'bitter old cow' -all unchallenged. Very often someone comes on and says 'I can't see why the age was relevant' -and I haven't seen one case where it was. While you are on AmyMumsnet-how do you defend heading a chapter 'dealing with the old biddies on the bus'?

Apologies but could you tell us which book that was in? We've had a quick look and can't find the chapter anywhere - of course, we could be missing something!

Amy, I just googled and found this:

Mumsnet Rules

Under Golden Rules, it's the fourth one listed.

And here

Excellent thread - Style and Beauty is particularly bad. We all look the same you see.

This is really interesting, on ageism in feminism:

www.newstatesman.com/politics/2014/11/why-does-feminism-have-come-waves

It's not just tonight, ageism is dreadful on MN.

It is not just women - although it is worse for women - but also for men.

A friend applied for jobs at 65. Not even an interview. he works had but on a freelance basis now where people pay per job - because he is good - but no company will recruit him.

Another friend, early sixties, no kids, always worked for low wages in a physical job is now seriously struggling and finds he is at the bottom of the list for most things including housing.

However older people who treat the young with disrespect also exist and that is also unreasonable.

Flo- I agree, I inwardly cringe when posters describe shoes they don't like as 'granny shoes.'

That is the one, Scone - why not just 'how to avoid unsolicited advice'- why single out older women? ( who probably have the best advice anyway!)

Me too, Dame, 'Granny' or 'old lady' used as a synonym for 'unflattering'.... It happens all the sodding time. Grrr.

That New Statesman article was really good, Devora. And ineffably depressing.

Just read the NS article - interesting.

Well I'm pleased to have opened up a discussion about this.
How do you report a post? . One thread was deleted but I read comments I guess the way forward is to report as we would with any other discriminatory remark that breaks the mumsnet rules. The comments I noticed last night were not confined to one thread.

Glad someone found the "old biddies on the bus" chapter. Where does humour start to become offensive-well try substituting the name of another minority-it sounds too offensive to type.

I don't mind "granny knickers" etc so much but there's something about "old dears" "old biddies" "old duffers" that is deeply offensive, and so subtly undermining that people don't notice it.
Older people seem to be considered so irrelevant that they don't even count.

Anyone who is over 30 is an old biddie

FFS.

some text missing-I meant to say that I also read offensive comments on other posts

Wishy washy response from HQ so far. I can't say I'm surprised.

As there is a lot of feeling about this could we encourage people to report posts where they see ageism? _but please tell me first-how do you report??

Thanks, drudgejudy for starting this much-needed discussion. I am on a laptop, so not sure about other devices, but there is a report link to the lower right of the post. Then you write your report. I reported my own post with the links to the "old biddies on the bus" to make sure that someone at MNHQ sees it.

Christina is that a joke or are you a massive tool?

Sorry, upper right of the post.

It's harder to find on the mobile site, but if you click the three dots on the lower right of a post, this opens up a sub menu with 'report' as an option.

When you challenge ageism on MN you're often dismissed and told you're humourless. That would never happen (and rightly so) if you challenged disablism. I'd like to see a campaign to raise awareness but so far we're a million miles away from that. MNHQ doesn't even seem to be aware of its own publications.

We have become invisible. We hold open doors and no one looks at us or gives any acknowledgement. DH standing in an empty car park the other day while I was in the Ladies. He was laughing when I came out as a driver had arrived and although spoilt for choice of a parking space headed straight for him. He said "what have I been saying, we are invisible". General sense that we are not noticed. We find it funny.