These things annoy me, but can't admit out loud without sounding like a w*****

[1wokeuplikethis]

Not exactly 'oh I won euromillions and have too much money' but the following things really annoy me and I can't tell anyone for fear of sounding like a total douche;

1. my legs are too thin. They aren't knobbly twigs, they've got a great shape but are probably a size 6 while my waist is a 12 so any jeans that fit my amazing legs won't do up and I need to let my belly hang free.

2. my expensive Clarins hand cream is shite.

3. I spent £40 on an amazing lancome toner only to realise after opening that it's the wrong one. So I had to spend £20 on the one I meant to buy.

4. after losing 4 stone in the last year none of my winter coats fit and I can't afford a new one -because I spend all my money on ridiculously expensive toiletries- so I basically look like a winter turkey with my giant coat and stick legs.

Am I allowed to be annoyed by the above? Am I alone in my self indulgent tragedies?

I live in a Devon watermill with 2 acres of garden, I used to run a mill for the National Trust and despite me being a qualified building type person DH ignores me and dismisses my opinions.

In order to get anything prioritised I have to have a small break down to prove how important it is. I want lights - not one room has sufficient. Apparently 1 bulb in the middle of the room is sufficient, 2 extravagant.

I've spent the last ten years merely sprinkling glitter on a listed turd. Instead of just getting an electrician in I want a maisonette in Brighton with a dimmer switch.

My DM has offered to buy me a house (been renting for 10 yrs). I can't be bothered to trek round the estate agents.

I'm gonna throw bricks at the grumpy Cornwall pair lol! I'll have yer house and smeary windows.

This thread has made me chuckle, one for classics if it keeps going I think.

MiL gifted us a lovely Arthur Price cutlery set but there's just not enough fecking knives! I'm constantly having to root around the dishwasher and handwash them. Do you think I could ask her to gift us another set? It is her fault after all

My mum is only giving me £300 towards a new ipad this Christmas, but I want one with 4g.

I'm sexy as fuck, it's a burden sometimes

I hate compliments. My family are always telling me how kind, funny and wonderful I am, and that I am beautiful, and have lovely golden skin - amazing for a redhead. I actually wish that they could all admire me but not tell me. It gets embarrassing.

DH keeps asking me what I want for Xmas and I have no idea. It's actually making me stressed...

My eyelashes are long but everyone presumes that they're false, which annoys me.

Bil and sil bought me a fancy spa voucher for my birthday. Took me 4 months to book a massage as I couldn't decide what Treatment I wanted, now I'm not looking forward to it, cos I CBA to shave my legs

I can appreciate how annoying it is for people thinking your bambi lashes are fake.

I have beautiful nails and people often exclaim 'they can't be real!' after they ask where I get them done. Huff.

RoundRobin my eyelashes are really long too, I don't wear mascara most if the time because they look fake if I do. They are always batting off my glasses.

I've lost 4 stone in the last year and I need loads of new clothes, but I hate clothes shopping

My children have really lovely manners and are very well behaved in public, so I sometimes have to "give out" to them on playdates so their friends didn't look too unruly...

My DS came back from holiday with a beautiful tan and lovely natural highlights to his already blond hair. If one more school gate mum accuses me of putting my 4yr old on a sun bed I'll scream! Also I have too much food in the freezer after doing 'a big shop' I cant decide what to cook for tea.

My dining room is being re-carpeted tomorrow and I have to tidy all the stuff out and box the books up so furniture can be shifted.

Sigh

People keep telling me I'm too small to be pregnant (currently 4 days overdue) which really annoys me but they say is good because it means I haven't put loads of weight on.

I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone my engagement ring (and wedding ring) is from Tiffany and cost 11k (wedding ring 3k) and as a copper I used to hide it and hold my hands so I was hidden so people didn't think I was showing off. Anyone who commented I would make a joke about it being cubic zirconia.

It annoys me that I don't know what to say when people compliment my toddler daughter.

My fancy wedding china never gets used because it has a gold rim and can't go through the dishwasher, and I CBA to hand wash it.

I bought my dad some really lovely slippers for his birthday, but mum has told me that he prefers to wear plimsolls around the house.

I want to say that the slippers cost me nearly £70 and if he doesn't want them, can I have them back to change for something he'd like.

I've told him I'll do this, but not the price (don't want to appear crass), but he hasn't given them back because he's probably trying to expensively avoid offending me.

I'm having to wait until tomorrow to buy my new MacBook in case there's any good black Friday deals. If I'd have bought it on Monday in currys I'd have 4 days macbooking under my belt already.
Oh, and DH just said let's have Chinese takeaway for dinner, but I fancy Indian. But the Indian takeaway doesn't deliver and I can't be arsed collecting.

I've lost about 8kg with very little effort through breastfeeding a ravenous 10 month old. I need a whole wardrobe of new clothes as nothing fits, but hate shopping.

We just got planning permission for a loft conversion, which means we can't also now afford the garden studio/workshop that I'd been dreaming of. Woe is me!

DP has bought me bigger diamond earrings from Tiffany than than I asked for and I'm worried they'll be too bling for very day wear.

I lost six and a half stone this year and dropped 4 dress sizes, I'm still wearing a few items of clothing in the big size because I have no money to buy a whole new wardrobe what with Christmas and everything. I'm reduced to wearing the two skirts I managed to buy myself in my new size, old shirts tucked into them and DH's skinny jeans that he's now too big for .
I also have no winter coat because I refuse to wear the one that's 4 sizes too big as it was already an "oversized coat" and it'll swamp me. I'd rather be cold than look like a twat.

I hate having thick curly hair. It never looks right, whatever style I try to get it cut into it just looks like a bush.

I need a wee.

I needed a glass of wine and before in even got up my DH ran downstairs (townhouse) to get one for me. But here's the real problem. He brought me back nuts. Wasabi nuts. I really want honey covered cashews but we haven't got any.

My DH brings me a cup of tea in bed every morning at 7am in addition to getting all the DC ready, doing packed lunches, breakfasts, and then the school run.

When he brings me my tea and kisses me, it wakes me up and I would like to stay sleeping. The thoughtless selfish bastard

This morning, I may or may not have gone back to sleep until 11 am though.