These things annoy me, but can't admit out loud without sounding like a w*****

[1wokeuplikethis]

Not exactly 'oh I won euromillions and have too much money' but the following things really annoy me and I can't tell anyone for fear of sounding like a total douche;

1. my legs are too thin. They aren't knobbly twigs, they've got a great shape but are probably a size 6 while my waist is a 12 so any jeans that fit my amazing legs won't do up and I need to let my belly hang free.

2. my expensive Clarins hand cream is shite.

3. I spent £40 on an amazing lancome toner only to realise after opening that it's the wrong one. So I had to spend £20 on the one I meant to buy.

4. after losing 4 stone in the last year none of my winter coats fit and I can't afford a new one -because I spend all my money on ridiculously expensive toiletries- so I basically look like a winter turkey with my giant coat and stick legs.

Am I allowed to be annoyed by the above? Am I alone in my self indulgent tragedies?

People buy used hand cream on ebay??

My new Prada boots gave me a blister.

Lancome may have exchanged your toner, Op. When I recently bought a load of stuff from No7 (not quite as expensive I know) they said I could bring anything back to exchange if I didn't get along with it even if I'd opened it and used some. If you haven't used much more yet, perhaps try that?

I'm irked by the fact my Nespresso machine only has two setting - Espresso and Lungo - I want it to have a ristretto setting too.

This is a very fed-upping thread. I've got none of these 'complaints'

On a slightly different note, I read (learnt) on here that if you call a latte a LARRRRTAAAYYY you're a massive bellend but I really can NOT bring myself to say 'latty' when ordering my laaartaaayyyy. And now I wonder if the barristas think I'm a posh twat, a posh posh overstuffed Turkey coated tiny legged twat :(

I have large, but not-too-large boobs that are quite perky.

I can only wear scoop necks unless I want to look like an overstuffed sausage (turtle neck), dowdy (polo neck), or tarty (v-neck). All my tops are super boring.

My DH said I'm not allowed to buy any Le Creuset until I can prove I can lift it. So far I've failed to prove that, I can't imagine trying to lift their ranges with food inside .

ahh you have so cheered me up.

one bathroom is a pain in the neck to keep clean. glad I do not have two.

glad I have not got too many winter coats spare. I have one spare and that is bothersome enough. (i may be battling with cleaning and sorting out the unserstairs cupboard today so am more sympathetic to the too much problem)

arse to making a mistake and buying sometihing for a treat that turns out to be shite. did that with hand held hoover.

YY to the three bathrooms being too much to clean.

My garden is too big so it's a massive effort to trudge round scouting for dog poo to scoop.

The diamond on my engagement ring is too big for a standard wedding ring so I have to have a specially made one and I can't have the one I originally wanted.

I can't wear any of my many pairs of designer jeans because my stomach is far too fat atm

I say lattay is that wrong?

Le creuset sent me my replacement pie dish..in the wrong bloody colour

They sent me blue. I wanted the teal fade.

I'm too lazy to send it back but every time I look at it, it annoys me.

Also YY to two bathrooms.

And the one I really will keep to myself but is niggling me: we are running out of room in the playroom.

I would be more concerned with your problem of buying expensive toiletries that you can't afford.

All my belstaff boots have mould on them

I'm size 18 on top and a 14 on the bottom, so I look like an upturned skittle

YY to three bathrooms.

Lancôme would have exchanged your toner. My mil bought me some face cream last year for Xmas that gave me awful spots and they changed it to a lighter cream quite happily.

i'm about to take my dog out for his long walk of the day, and i've just realised my favourite wellie socks are in the washing machine, so i've got to go all the way upstairs for my non-favourite ones

YY to having too many bathrooms to clean...

I have too many clothes for my enormous average sized wardrobe and they all get squashed.

I am v happy with DH; he's lovely and about as close to perfect as I can imagine a man ever being - which means (a) I never get to join in with the 'bitching about men' conversations at work/out with friends/with family and (b) I also don't get to brag because they would all want to vomit.

I worry that my legs are too thin for skinny jeans.

My hair is very thick and it takes ages to blow-dry & style.

And thanks to Iwokeup I now also have the latte problem

I have too many friends and am finding it hard to find time to see them all. Woe is me.

I have a luxurious Persian rug in my living room. I got it for free, it's the perfect size, and probably the highest quality item I own.

But I dislike the pattern.

My DH said I'm not allowed to buy any Le Creuset until I can prove I can lift it. So far I've failed to prove that, I can't imagine trying to lift their ranges with food inside

Ahem, Le Creuset do stainless steel casseroles too. Bet you could lift those.

Stick legs and no waist here too.

The solution to both that and the person with the skinny waist and fat legs is skirts! And opaque tights. Skinny legs wears mini skirts or when not trying to convince self of ability to be a vamp, tunics and leggings. Skinny waist gets to wear dirndl and floppy swishy skirt to show off waist!

I've virtually given ip on trousers as they never fit. Ever. Jeans, forget it

I have to go out this evening to act as a hair model. I love people playing with my hair, it's so relaxing and I'm even getting paid for it so it's free money ss well.

I can't be arsed

Yes yes yes to the thick lustrous locks!!! My hair takes so bloody long to dry and style I can only be arsed to wash it twice a week. And sometimes I have to go through that rigmarole AFTER having a luxurious soak in my beautiful freestanding enormous bath and it completely undoes all the soothing & relaxing from said 'tub'.

I've recently lost weight and gone down 2 sizes but can't be bothered buying new clothes so simply moan at dh every morning that nothing fits.
Spent a year planning and building the most amazing extension and am already tired of tidying and cleaning it. I'm seriously considering making everyone use just one bathroom so I don't have to clean them all.
Yes I know I'm a brat