MIL - I've really no idea why she was so upset about this?

[MyballsareSandy]

My 13 year old DDs go from school to the in laws every Wed, have dinner there and DH collects them. They don't particularly like doing this as they are old enough to go home alone, until me and DH get home from work, which we allow on other days. It's just basically to keep in touch with their grandparents, and usually the GPs love it (I think!).

Anyway, yesterday DH arrives at his parents to find his mum in floods of tears, and his dad having stern words with DD2. Apparently she was doodling in a notebook and wrote "Nan smells of fart" . Bit childish at 13, but really is it worth the drama that followed, I just don't get it.

DD doesn't want to go there anymore, she can't understand the reaction either and would much rather just go home after school, which I'm tempted to say yes to.

The only reason anyone could want to try to excuse this girl's behaviour is because there is a mother in law involved. It's sooooooo depressing. Do people not realise that their own mothers are mothers in law, and they will be mothers in law themselves one day?

I wouldn't be upset by this, if me and my 13 year old were otherwise getting on fine: my mum would.

(If we weren't getting on, it would probably be more like 'mum is a stupid bitch', if I'm honest. At 13, anyway!)

Most children get that you are usually a bit more polite and less irreverent with your grandparents, don't they? However good a relationship you have with them. And if you are already not wanting to be there, and beinga bit hostile, this must indeed have been upsetting.

Your dd was rude and I think deserving of a bollocking.

I am simply playing devil's advocate. and trying to balance the hysteria suggesting that this GM was "devastated".
Let's get this in perspective.

The mil overreacted big but that isn't really the issue. The behaviour of op's daughter is.

But what was the DDs behaviour alis?

NoMarymary Thu 13-Nov-14 16:58:37

13 a child? Like the ones who have babies or intercourse are children? No 13 is not a child.

I have reported this post, I feel sick reading it.

I think its vile you can come out with such a base comment.

13 ARE CHILDREN THEY CANNOT CONSENT TO SEXUAL INTERCOURSE.

What a disgrace.

You know that comment No Mary is the worse thing in the whole thread far worse than the crime being discussed you should be ashamed of yourself if your not just a goady troll that is

My lovely dm farts regularly. I assume it is age related as she never used to. Perhaps the mil is afflicted similarly, and so took the comment very personally.
13 is plenty old not to be so unpleasant.

"Sad about the way she's turning out already?"
What the FART.
Fair few assumptions made on this thread.
I don't blame OP for avoiding this thread or not replying (or heaven forbid just not logging on to mumsnet just because she's urrrr busy!?)

Wow, all these comments about the naughty fart but its gone un noticed someone has said because 13 year olds have sex and babies they are not children . Typical

For a few people the place of an older relative-particularly a MIL is always in the wrong.
MIL's reaction is irrelevant daughter's behaviour is poor.
I am not young-I do swear and I'm not particularly offended by swearing but I don't swear at people if you see what I mean-so I might say "fucking hell!" but I wouldn't say "You stupid twat"-that's because I think about other people's feelings which OP needs to teach her DD to do.
If OP can't see a problem here she is also rude and inconsiderate.

200 + posts and no sign of the OP, are being had ??

It is not half term is it ??

Are we being had even.......

All this talk about swearing...does this mean "fart" is a swear word?

Of course 13 is a child. What a ridiculous assertion to suggest it isnt. That is actually quite disturbing.

Anyway. I agree it was a thoughtless thing to write. And deserving of an apology and an explanation about how it would be hurtful.

Was she really in floods of tears? Really?

Anyway, what happened to the "Op"

The OP is a regular poster on these boards

ZeVite hadn't gone completely unnoticed but I see your point! Glad u have reported!

Ok' sorry reggie

I'd be mortified if my DDcwas so rude and lacking in consideration and empathy.
Whether or not anyone thinks MIL was overreacting clearly she was deeply upset and that should not be dismissed.

To me "fart" does come into the category of swear word-its certainly coarse and grates on me more than some "stronger" swear words

I've never been more on the fence. MIL has overreacted but DD was rude and should know better. Storm in a teacup!

It was a really horrible thing to write, basically a way of saying that she has no affection or respect for her gran. I would give her a serious talking to. She won't have her gran there wanting to be with her all her life, and should appreciate it while she can.

I dont think its an age reaction to the word.

I dont like it.

My MIL used it once to describe a beautiful 3 year old as doing...." she has been farting all day" I was horrified she used such a word to describe gorgoues sweet three year old who had wind in my view.

That's ok Amanda. It is bizarre that she hasn't returned. OP if you're out there please come back. You won't get 'flamed'. People have asked for more context and it would be useful for you to add this to the discussion. People have given pieces of advice, some more useful than others but I'm sure we've given you stuff to think about.

So what do you say when you accidentally... Well...fart?
"Sorry I accidentally emitted wind from my anus"
Or is fart just a swear word when directed at somebody as an insult
Ie;
"Shut up you old fart and stop farting around"