to feel uncomfortable about my son praying at school?

[KirjavaTheCat]

DS is four and has just started reception. A couple of days ago, we were playing and he said something like "...and then we put our hands together without clapping like this, and shut our eyes and say, 'dear God' and then we say things"

I asked where he learned that and apparently they pray every morning. I find this odd because his class is made up of children from all different religious backgrounds, and it isn't a faith school. Why are they learning to worship?

We're not religious. I don't think I'm comfortable with him praying to 'God' every day. Should I say something? AIBU?

YANBU I feel the same about praying in school. We aren't religious and I don't see why other peoples beliefs should be pushed on to our children at school. My children go to a C of E school and I put up with the praying in assembly etc because they're happy there, and making very good progress. When they come home talking about bible stories, 'god made the world' etc I explain it's a story that some people believe in, but we (DH and I) don't. I just explain the facts to them, hopefully at a level they understand. My 4yr old DD spent hours the other night pretending to be Moses and being washed away down the river. I had to find her, and look after her. DH was God apparently...

Of course it's brainwashing. It's teaching religion as a fact.

I find it quite funny when my DD tells me about her ultra religious Easter and Christmas services. In her class, there's one Christian, she thinks there's about six in her year (of 120). Most kids are Hindu, then a lot of Muslims, and after that it's a mix of kids from a Jewish (my DD), atheist, Sikh and Jain background. I think something like 1 in 10 go to church regularly, in the UK?

Why do people say we are a Christian country? The 2011 Census/ONS states that 59.3% of the population identified as Christian. That may have shifted further down again by now. Do not forget that includes parents who answered the census for their children as well as including cultural Christians.This post unpicking some of the stats shows the shift in religious affiliation downwards.

We should be moving towards a totally separated state, so that children have the space and time to decide for themselves, as well as recognising the changing nature of religion in this country. Sorry to derail, YANBU. If you remove your son ensure they actually provide for him and don't simply put him in the library with a book.

Do you not want him to hear any religious stories? What about R.E? Are you happy for him to hear about Buddism or Islam for example?

I'm happy for my children to be taught about what each religion believes in and their customs...I am not happy for them to be told religious stories as fact. My ds is convinced Adam and Eve were the first people as he heard it at school.

So, what about science? Do they teach the the big bang theory alongside compulsory worship, or is it up to the school? How is that not confusing

Dd's school has prayers which is fine as it is a faith school.

However I did find it strange that they spent time learning the lord's prayer by rote without learning what it meant or how it came about. To me that was worthless.

By the way the link identifies a number of those who identify as Christian don't actually believe in Jesus and many don't describe themselves as religious, so I don't think we should blanket state this is a Christian nation.

Shielding them is a bad thing. Teaching kids that people can rise from the dead as a fact is a very bad thing! I don't think anyone has a problem with RS (I'm from a country where all schools were non religious, but as a teen, when I moved to the UK, it was easily my favourite subject), but it being taught as a fact is wrong, surely?

although many in this country identify as Christian, they aren't really as the emptiness of most churches will tell you. People who identify as members of other religions tend to be more active in their observance.

unfortunately we aren't a secular state and an act of collective worship has to be held in schools.

when I think of all the shit that has been imported from America (proms, mucky Ds, obesity)...why is it that the only good thing we could get from them (separation of religion and state) hasn't got here?

I see lots of threads similar to these and think very much these things are over thought. I do remember assembly, prayers.. Who doesn't know the lords prayer. You learnt it at school.

I went to a normal primary . We used to say grace every day before our meal.

I enjoyed the songs ( hymns )

Schools are less 'active' in this way than when I was in the infants. I really wouldn't worry about it, it's just 'something they do' and really doesn't mean anything to the kids - they just do it because they have to... much like every other part of sitting through Assembly

At home all you have to say is 'Yes, some people think x, I think y' or 'Oh really, that's interesting'.... it's really, really not going to have any influence on him. It's just another story/song/thing.

I think singling them out not to go to Assembly put much 'more' focus on it and makes him 'different' to his friends over something so 'whatever'.

Do they teach the the big bang theory alongside compulsory worship

Yes.

How is that not confusing

Because one is a religion and one is science. Religion is based on faith. Science is based on fact. It is possible to live with both working side by side together.

To think that a religious person cannot possibly understand or follow evolution or the big bang theory is a little strange in this day and age.

DS loves the creation story in Genesis. It's his favourite bit of the Bible. He does not believe that God made the world in seven days; he recognises that the creation story is an early attempt to make sense of the universe, but he likes the visual elements of that story nonetheless. He is equally interested in the moment of the big bang and the wonder of the universe in its physical sense. He likes to look outward at the stars. He does not think that if he could get in a rocket he could go and find God. That's not what God is to him.

He's 9, by the way, and he understands and has resolved this just fine.

I wouldn't worry about it too much. I had to pray and sing hymns and do compulsory Catholic classes at primary school (not a faith school) and I still grew up to be an atheist

Because one is a religion and one is science. Religion is based on faith. Science is based on fact. It is possible to live with both working side by side together.

Except some religious people insist their religion is fact. At which point people stop being nice to one another, and we all know where that leads ...

I'm thinking from the perspective of a four year old, who's attempting to get to grips with everything he's learning. I don't think it's as easy for a child so young to grasp the differences as it would be for an older child.

That's why I was shocked that it's being taught this early - or at all, really.

Bit 'it' I mean the actual act of worship. The actual act of praying and giving thanks to God. I am very surprised by this.

If you're uncomfortable about it then you can send a letter requesting your DS is excused from any RE lessons and/or acts of worship.

fwiw I went to an RC school and there were always some DCs who opted out but most participated even those of other faiths and none (Muslims, C of E, etc). I think their parents felt that an understanding of religion was important for appreciating history, literature, culture and politics. And as for the act of praying, I think they thought that taught tolerance and respect for different beliefs.

My 5 year old dgs ( faith school, atheist parents) told me that if we put everyone's ideas about God togethet and shhok them up that would be the 'real' God. That's fine.

Yeah DS has been praying at school too. I'm atheist and wasn't too happy about ds going to Church school, but out here your choice is CofE or Catholic.

He did his little prayer in front of me the other day - actually it was really cute! Bless him. I can't bring myself to get worked up over it - it wasn't indoctrination as such, just 'bless my family and my friends and all the little boys and girls'. He says he likes Jesus, but he also likes Father Christmas.

Looking. I see your point about science. But, if you are athiests then there isn't a god at all. So purely by praying to this non-existent person every day, and thanking him for things he didn't actually do, is introducing an unnecessary entity in to the equation. I probably haven't explained it very well. Basically mentioning god, and thanking god in assemblies or at meal times is not acknowledging the true person/people who deserve the respect. Also looking to god to give you the strength to do something, rather than looking to yourself or your family/friends.. it just annoys me! I don't necessarily think it's going to harm my children, (I had the same at school and went to sunday school but never beleived it) but I don't see what help it is either. Religion of any kind should never be taught as fact. I wouldn't withdraw my children though, because I wouldn't want to single them out. I'd rather the government would just separate state funding and religion completely.

My DC has just started school too and the proselytising is giving me the hump too. We're right at the start of her schooling, and want to be presenting a united message with her teachers, but can't.

Yes, we want RE to be taught. Surely it's easy to say, "some people believe X, other people believe Y".

No, I don't want my child to pray in school. Getting a four year old to thank god for their snack every day is telling them that god is real, ie delivering a belief as a fact.

Then again I live in NI, where we're in the 1950s on several things.