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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be absolutely disgusted at this

173 replies

Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 16:30

Dd2 has been unwell for 3plus weeks.various symptoms including fatigue, sleeping all day, erratic blood sugars (shes diabetic), looks pale, memory issues, headache sore throat tummy ache and backache
Saw gp three timea this week and they couldnt find the cause.she was so sleepy and had very sore eyes yest so we went to a and e today.
They were absolutely fucking hateful to us.dismissed our worries and laughed in my face when I said I was worried dd may be anaemic
They looked in her throat said it was fine and declared she looked well to them when they have not seen her over the last three weeks ill and this week in particular.
I asked about a full blood count and they got agressive saying I was asking for a blood test for my own reassurance and proceeded to talk about bleeding a child and sticking a needle in dd just to reassure me it was horrendous.
Dd has to have procedures done reg due to her other problems and they were terrifying her and being rude and dismissing us.
Im so worried about dd and now so angry and upset.she isnt right and nobody will take it seriously

OP posts:
Badvoc123 · 10/10/2014 18:28

Hedgehog...you sound so worried. I wish I could give you a Big hug.
Look, even if your dd has "only" got a virus, it's obv making her very ill.
Is it too late to phone the gp and ask for an emergency appt?

Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:30

Dh said to the consultant dd has been so ill she hasn't been in school and she replied something along the lines of even if she has the blood test it will all be negative or she would eat something horrid if she was proved wrong then said even with a negative set of results dd would still be ill and we wouldn't send her in.
Dh mentioned the memory issues and the doctor said she wasnt concerned about it !!

OP posts:
Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:33

Our GPS are shut now.

I've cried my eyes out as I know this sounds paranoid and dramatic but she's been looking so ill and acting so out of character that I keep thinking she will just die and that one morning I will find her so we are barely sleeping. Something is wrong with her be it a virus/infection/reaction to her flu vaccination/anaemia or worse I don't know.

It seemed ok for the doctor to believe she could just look at dd and know she was ok but not allowed for me to look at my own daughter and know something's not right. If I go back there and say how worried I am I think they will phone social services.

OP posts:
Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:35

She did have a throat infection and antibiotics around the 20 sep but it was better after them and she seemed ok for a couple of days after finishing them although did have the memory issues then.

OP posts:
Badvoc123 · 10/10/2014 18:35

God, some consultants are ignorant arseholes aren't they?
Ds2 had an op in July.
The little boy opposite had the same but became quite ill after coming back from recovery.
The sister called the consultant and he didn't even examine the boy, just said "oh yes that's fine' and walked off! (Probably had a private clinic to get to!)
The sister was livid and called a paed reg and at one point the poor child had 5 drs round his bed!
He ended up in HDU :(
I don't tell you this to frighten you, but to point out that some consultants are ignorant twats, just like you find in every other profession.

plentyavino · 10/10/2014 18:35

I think doctors can underestimate a mothers instinct. Your DD sounds very unwell, if I were you I'd be taking her back to a&e tonight, don't go home until you're satisfied that they've done enough.

Badvoc123 · 10/10/2014 18:37

You aren't mad!
The answer is a dr cannot tell you your dd is ok if they didn't even examine her.
Obs only tell so much...temp, sats etc.
My ds2 was seen in a and e last year by a nurse practitioner
Told me he was fine. (Temp etc)
We were back next morning and he was admitted for 2 days with tracheitis and was on IV antibiotics!!
The same dr was on...I could see the look of panic in her face when Ds was admitted!

Badvoc123 · 10/10/2014 18:38

...take her in. Now. Before the drunks start rolling in :(

Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:42

Dh is just attempting to change her cannula but she's screaming and crying as is terrified of needles. God I hate that bitch of a consultant for saying what she did in front of dd

OP posts:
Stillwishihadabs · 10/10/2014 18:43

OP I don't want to frighten you but there are quite a few things which it could be after a streptococcal throat infection. Was it a paediatric consultant you saw. Whereabouts are you ? You don't have to say if you don't want to.

ithoughtofitfirst · 10/10/2014 18:44

I find it disgusting that they would laugh off your concerns cause even if you were being completely neurotic then that shows a total lack of concern for either of you. She sounds genuinely really poorly and you sound extremely worried. Are you able to get her to a&e?

Evabeaversprotege · 10/10/2014 18:44

Take her elsewhere hedgehog. The poor child - and you.

I'd make a complaint about the consultant too!

Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:45

Yes it was a doctor in a and e then the paed consultant. They said its not an active infection if any as no temp and throat not red.

OP posts:
saintlyjimjams · 10/10/2014 18:46

As she's diabetic it is an A&E issue IMO - that changes everything. M

When did she have her flu jab & what form was it (nasal spray or jab?) - although if they're being awkward & going all MSBP on you then be very careful about mentioning that.

I was accused of making up developmental problems in my son by a HCP OP (when he was 2). He's 15 now, non verbal & severely autistic. In that case I shut up, said no more to the HCP & waited until I saw someone else.

If you can try a different A&E I would maybe. Or OOH.

Stratter5 · 10/10/2014 18:46

The more I read, the more horrified I am. Jesus, I thought their number one rule was to listen to the parents, it certainly should be.

How on earth can the consultant tell if she's anaemic or not, just by looking?

Stillwishihadabs · 10/10/2014 18:48

Oh and just for the record if you are asked I would want an fbc,renal function, aso titre,esr,crp and monospot (sometimes called a Paul burnell. Good luck [flowers ]

Badvoc123 · 10/10/2014 18:49

I have also lost faith in the NHS for various reasons in the last year.
My old gp used to say
"When mum is worried, I am worried, when grandma is worried, I am very worried!"

Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:49

It was nasal flu vacc last sat.

They said that in the absence of any bleeding and by looking at dd they could tell. I myself have been severely anaemic in gp and my gums were still pink and although I was pale not terribly so.

OP posts:
Stillwishihadabs · 10/10/2014 18:50

Sorry Flowers

Original poster
Edenviolet · 10/10/2014 18:51

I did mention the flu vacc. I had written out all her existing conditions and what has been happening, I didn't want to forget anything and for them to have the full picture but they did not like the "list as long as your arm of symptoms" and were very odd about it.

OP posts:
atticusclaw · 10/10/2014 18:54

I'm not for one moment dismissing your concerns about your daughter's illness and I do hope you work out what is wrong. BUT this is not what A&E is for. Its for accidents or for emergencies. Not blood tests, not concerns about anaemia, not UTIs. These are matters for your GP or, if your GP is shut, for your local NHS drop in centre or out of hours surgery. Call NHS direct and they will send you to the right place i.e your out of hours surgery. If you'd taken her to your out of hours surgery you'd have had a different response.

plentyavino · 10/10/2014 18:54

OP please please take your DD back to a&e tonight, it doesn't matter if they think you're being an overreacting parent. This is your DD and you feel something is not right. Medical professionals get it wrong sometimes.

plentyavino · 10/10/2014 18:55

Atticusclaw - a young child who is very lethargic and unresponsive should surely be considered an emergency?

phantomnamechanger · 10/10/2014 18:56

hedgehog, this is awful. I agree with the posters above who suggested coeliac as a possibility, sounds like it even without the link with diabetes. I hope you get some answers very soon.

you absolutely must persist until they listen to you, any sign of her getting worse, straight back to a&e.

I have been the "paranoid mother making a fuss about nothing" and have proven doctors wrong about 2 of my kids. It happens all the time.

My neighbours DH, who already had dementia, died of skin cancer, she brought him to see me to show me his back, he had classic black scaly raised patches like little volcanoes on his back and they were frequently bleeding. as a complete layperson I knew this was textbook skin cancer, yet he had been prescribed cream for bedsores!! he was admitted to hospital where the nurse took one look at his back and was horrified to learn he was not receiving treatment.

Gileswithachainsaw · 10/10/2014 18:56

attic utis can actually he very serious.

I dread to think. When dd was a baby it left her septic. She was on its for nearly a week and six months of antibiotics after.