To be rude to this woman even when she was polite to me?

[Bearsinmotion]

Just got home from work with DD. I am 18 weeks pregnant and knackered. DP is away on business. I am also disabled and have a parking space outside my house. One of the neighbours is parked in it - no blue badge. After driving round the block I find a space about 50m away - further than my normal walking distance. Wrestle DD out of the car, my work bag, her nursery bag and my walking stick and stagger to the house, stopping every few m.

Neighbour appears in gym kit and unlocks the car saying "oh sorry, is this your space?"

"Yes, this is my house"

"Sorry, there wasn't anywhere else to park"

"Do you think there was anywhere else for me? I'm 18 weeks pregnant, disabled and I have a toddler to look after! I'm exhausted. What am I supposed to do?!"

"I'm really sorry, can I do anything to help?"

"No! no you can't. It's too late. Maybe next time you could think about why these spaces are here and who might need to use them."

Am now in house trying not to cry. I'm going to have to make the same journey back to the car in the morning and will now worry all day in case it happens again. That space is my lifeline. If the only space was another 50m away I would not be able to get home at all :(

Motability cars can only be driven by the people named on the contract. Doesn't matter what insurance anyone else has, they can not drive a motability car. If the contract holder of a motability car allowed somebody not named on the contract to drive the car, they have completely invalidated both the insurance policy and, potentially, the contract with motability themselves.

Not strictly true Doc you can just ring rsa motability and add/ switch insured drivers. It takes minutes.

Exactly - they have to be named on the contract

I was really trying to point out to other people that just because they personally have fully comp insurance, it doesn't mean they can drive a motability car on third party.

OP - she wasn't polite to you. She was trying to wriggle out of the consequences of behaving like a selfish entitled shit - I actually think that the more furious we are when faced with this sort of completely unacceptable behaviour, then the less likely such people are to do it again. Let them feel the full force of our anger

Iamannoyed the problem is that some mistakes -like this one - cause others physical discomfort and emotional distress. So while I'm sure the OP will, in time, forgive and move on, for now she is understandably upset. The impact of the mistake is going to continue for her tomorrow (longer walk to her car) and beyond (fear that it will happen again).

OP did nothing wrong. I think she was pretty measured in the circumstances.

Isitmeor, that hits the nail on the head - the immediate problem is solved, the car is back outside my house and DD and all our stuff are in. But I used to confidently go out thinking I would be fine getting home, now I'm worried I won't be able to get home. The car is my mobility aid! I'm pretty much housebound without it, as is DD. I don't want to ask DP not to go away but as pregnancy progresses I can't risk this happening again :(

I dont think she will do it again.

So if others haven't til now hopefully you will go back to still being fine :)

YANBU at all. Politeness means nothing after being selfish & inconsiderate. If it were a genuine mistake, politeness would help but this is clearly not a mistake!

Aw Bears, sorry you're feeling that way. That kind of anxiety can be difficult to manage. For me, I find it helps to have some Plan Bs for if the scenario happened.

Are there any neighbours who could help you if it did happen again, e.g. by parking the car for you?

FFS this person did not make a mistake
she parked in a disabled bay and knew she had done it.
decent people do not do this,
picking on fanjo is a bit odd and silly.

If you find a car in your space again, get the neighbours to help by blocking it in