To think that everyone is so bloody miserable on here?

[usualsuspect333]

It's all whinging and moaning.

Oh, only it's arse has shown up. Perhaps the arse picture will help you identify the beastie in your bathroom usual.

I don't know about grasshoppers. But we used to dissect locusts in biology. Similar.

Grasshopper??

We were supposed to get to dissect a cows eye in biology. That bloody year bse happened and we weren't allowed to. There was no alternative dissecting. I'm still bitter.

I had a grasshopper on the tele the other day. My partner tried to take it outside and accidentally pulled on of legs off :(

Should say one off his

Aaa mr miyage-san

I think that grasshoppers hopping days are over happy :(

It's got five other fucking legs!

It needs to get a fucking grip FFS.

Well it did survive, but unfortunately the next morning he tried to move it to a nicer bit of the garden and accidentally pulled another leg off :( it seems their legs are improbably loosely attached. Then he put it out of it's presumed misery.
It was quite the saga.

Greedy bastard.

the poor grasshopper was tortured then murdered!

Don't they breathe through their legs or something?

Poor thing was probably gasping.

I killed a daddy long legs about half an hour ago. It was trying to get into bed with me, the cheeky dangly-legged fucker. The cat ate it after it was dead, but I seem to have removed a dangly leg or two each time I missed it before scoring a direct hit.

Those legs are doubtless strewn about my bedlinen. Urgh.

Oh don't! Honestly it was pretty dreadful for the poor grasshopper, but there was literally fuck all I could do. It felt like every time I looked my partner was standing there looking crestfallen, sheepishly holding another grasshopper leg.

He doesn't usually do that all the time. If he did I would LTB.

every time I looked my partner was standing there looking crestfallen, sheepishly holding another grasshopper leg.

What a perfect depiction of dramatic pathos

Maryz, we're on to grasshoppers now.

at your confession 'Happy.'

I bet his wife and 452 children are missing him.

Ha I'm not entirely sure what dramatic pathos means but I think I like it!

Is it like nachos? I like nachos.

I'm traumatised by the killing of that poor grasshopper. What's next happy? Innocent lady birds savagely attacked? A killing spree of beetles? Your dp needs to be stopped, for the love of god.