AIBU to cancel childs birthday?

[LandOfWishfulThinking]

Childs birthday is tomorrow.

After a lot of excited waiting, with one day to go, it seems to have all got to her.

This morning she searched the house and located a present unwrapping it. She was told off, and told that she shouldn't look for presents and open because then there's nothing for tomorrow. "Okay mum"

But the search continued, and she's now found her birthday cards - in my sock drawer (so shes actively searching not randomly stumbling across). She then found a few cake decorations for her cake Im making tonight in a different place. Im very annoyed now so Ive told her, if she continues to search and she finds one more thing - her birthday is cancelled.

Its not an empty threat, but I am wondering just how okay it is to actually carry it out. And to what extent? So no presents and she has to wait another day? Cancelling family visiting (theyre close to us so it wouldn't be a issue to cancel, just upsetting to her and probally a little to them) Completely cancelling?

Hopefully touchwood there will be no more searching and it wont get to that.
But if it does, AIBU to carry it out?

How old is she?

You could cancel her bday but you will be making a whole load of hassle for yourself.

Get better at hiding stuff and breathe.

How old is she?

Aw don't cancel anything

It's all part of childhood searching for presents

Just tell her off & forget about it

It would be very mean to cancel family visiting

Shes 4, so still young. But Ive told her several times today since the first incident. Shes not listening (as they tend not to do)

You can't cancel a 4 year-old's birthday! I thought you were going to say she's ten or something.

If you cancel, all she'll remember is that one birthday when she was absolutely devastated the whole day. She's just excited! Plus you'll feel guilty as shit too.

Do you have anywhere with a lock?

It sounds like her birthday has been very hyped up. When my children were this age, I didn't really say much about their birthdays/Christmas in the run up because they do find it very hard to control their excitement.

Don't cancel family but beware that she might still be very hyped up and tantrumy tomorrow.

Noooo, you can't cancel a 4-year-old's birthday!! Too mean.

Can't you remember the intense excitement? Why not harness it rather than kill it?

Is she turning four or five ??

Omg op don't cancel anything !!

She's very young to cancel it. Maybe the lack of surprises can be a consequence of her searching?

Next time lock them away somewhere!

She's far too little to even think about punishing her. I agree. Next time hide them away or give them to a relative.

She is too young to be expected to contain her excitement.
Please don't cancel her birthday.
find another punishment such as time out for snooping when she has been asked not to, or for not listening to mummy.
When my 2 used to snoop on the run up to Christmas I used to say anything they found went back to Santa - they soon stopped snooping! Might be the way to go in the future.

No she's just a tiny little thing, don't cancel. She really doesn't understand And is just excited.

Jeez, she's 4!

She doesn't have the capacity to think through her actions and consequences. She's just excited. Who told her there were presents etc hidden? Mine is 6 and it wouldn't even occur to her to look, but birthdays are very matter of fact here.

Cancel it and all she'll remember is her birthday is a horrible, horrible day. And she'll likely not even remember why.

Do you have control issues or something?

PS - I never did send anything back to Santa, as actually they only ever found gifts for their cousins, but I wanted to nip the snooping in the butt.

Are you for real OP?

Turning 4 or 5? DD is turning 4 next week and she is like this, she just can't seem to help herself. I would however, expect more of a child turning 5.

You made the threat - now stick to it. To the bleeding hearts who say she will be devastated.........so she will, but it is a life lesson.

My son did this one Christmas when he was 5 - he was so upset that he knew what everything was that he was getting he never did it again (and the few bits I had kept back he never got, so he had no surprises at all). He still remembers it to this day.......and says he was so silly to have done it!

I used to do this every year at Christmas. My mother wouldn't have been so cruel to cancel Christmas, just "Oh well... you have no surprises!. (Although she did plant a few red herrings)

how is she getting all this time alone to ransack the house??

4????

Bloody hell OP!

Hide things better next time, she's still so little, I know grown adults that go hunting out surprises or gifts, never mind a 4 yr old

arabella

Boy - am I ever glad that I'm a bleeding heart. I bet my kids are glad too.

Much too harsh for such a young child.

Can you hide stuff in the car? She cant get into that and root through unnoticed.
She's excited, you'll laugh about it in a few years. :)