My friend kept dds money and used Tesco vouchers

[jammyjamjam]

Hi, ds had inservice yesterday and a friend (a mum from school) offered to take her, her own dd and 2 others to an amusement park, entry fee was 25 pounds. When ds got back in the afternoon, we chatted about the day and it turns out the mum paid for my dd and the 2 other children with Tesco vouchers, ie, she had redeemed her Tesco points to pay for the 4 dcs and then kept 75 pounds form my dd and the 2 other dc. Surely she could have told us that this place took in Tesco vouchers and I could have used my own points and saved the money? I'm grateful that she took dd but surely she should have been upfront about her intention of using vouchers....AIBU?

YANBU. She had Tesco points. She spent money to earn those. By using them for your daughter she was giving up the opportunity to use those points for her own family.

You were happy to pay the 25 quid entrance. Yes, it would have been nice of her to give you the choice of using your own Tesco points, but you can still use them for something else.

YAB even more U if she spent money on transport, snacks etc too.

You still haven't said what you would have done for childcare if your friend hadn't taken your DD out.

Can you use clubcard vouchers without the clubcard though?

oh yes, I sent dd with extra money for food and icecreams etc. I even gave my friend a bottle of wine to say thank you for taking her. I did this before they set off and certainly before I found out about the vouchers...grrrr

So, JessieMcJessie, is the OP NBU or BU?

I'm a SAHM so no childcare issues

Maybe your friend needs the money.

That's nice you sent a bottle of wine etc.

It does not matter.
She could have paid for the tickets with your money and she could have used her points to pay for her shopping at Tesco. Does it matter where she used her points, really?

Sorry, typo, I mean "YABU" at the beginning.

I think it's wrong because
1- the tesco vouchers aren't the same than money in cash. You can do whatever you want with cash. You are much much more limited with the vouchers.
2- even if you consider it's the same than cash, then she has spent 3times less than the upfront cash. Ie she has actually 'gained' £50 out of the trip.
3- tesco vouchers aren't 'real' money ie you didn't have to earn those. There are a ploy to make you use the club card and learn about your spending habits plus they tie you up with tesco making you an 'attached' customer less likely to go anywhere else. In that sense saying that cash and vouchers are the same IS wrong.

The issue of the transport, ice cream etc is another issue IMO.

Tricky one. On one hand you got exactly what you wanted at the expected price. On the other hand it appears she has converted her vouchers into cash at your expense.

I would be unhappy she didn't let you know before hand, maybe you could have used your own CC points or decided if you were happy with her 'profiting' out of you in that way.

" Add message | Report | Message poster MissMillament Wed 03-Sep-14 12:43:26
I think you are being a bit petty here. What would you have done if your friend hadn't offered to take your DD for the day? Presumably she saved you having to take a day's leave or use childcare?"
But presumably this arrangement is reciprocated?

" Add message | Report | Message poster Lweji Wed 03-Sep-14 12:56:59
It does not matter.
She could have paid for the tickets with your money and she could have used her points to pay for her shopping at Tesco. Does it matter where she used her points, really?"

Except in store shed have used £25 worth of points to get £25 worth of ticket. In this case she only needed £6.25 of vouchers. She's effectively sold her vouchers to the other parents at 4x face value.

It's not that far-fetched Sam. She's made herself £56 cash profit (petrol notwithstanding) that she would not have got had she used her vouchers pound for pound in the shop.

At the very least she should have been honest about the fact she was effectively charging each parent roughly twenty quid each for the privilege.

Very sneaky.

And I don't really have a problem with it - if I was going somewhere I was prepare to pay full price to go to and knew someone else had vouchers they'd like converting into cash I'd happily do it. But it seems a bit sneaky in this case

It is bit cheeky but it was nice of her to take your DC out for the day. I guess it only cost you what it should have cost.

Sounds a bit cheeky to me. It's not like receiving cash and paying on her visa card. She has benefitted from redeeming vouchers in this way. She did do something nice by taking them all put for the day. I would have only asked for the cost ( if I didn't pay the lot).

yes very sneaky. I feel she's taken advantage a little bit, that she's been a bit too clever

If she used £25 of vouchers YABU.

If she used £6.25 of vouchers YANBU - and she should have charged you £6.25 as this is what it cost her.

I personally think the behaviour of this mum is not very nice and is very underhand. You get the points as a bonus, I imagine this mum would still have used the food or fuel or whatever entitled her to these points in the first place so she wasn't really paying out for the tickets as such. Anyway OP, as long as your DS had a nice time I think you have to put it behind you and move on. Ill feeling and loss of friendship isn't worth it for the sake of just £25

Well, now you know!

I totally understand where you are coming from, however am I right that she told you what she had done when dropping the children back to you? If so it can't have been that calculated a setup of else she would have kept quiet.