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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

My friend kept dds money and used Tesco vouchers

791 replies

jammyjamjam · 03/09/2014 12:24

Hi, ds had inservice yesterday and a friend (a mum from school) offered to take her, her own dd and 2 others to an amusement park, entry fee was 25 pounds. When ds got back in the afternoon, we chatted about the day and it turns out the mum paid for my dd and the 2 other children with Tesco vouchers, ie, she had redeemed her Tesco points to pay for the 4 dcs and then kept 75 pounds form my dd and the 2 other dc. Surely she could have told us that this place took in Tesco vouchers and I could have used my own points and saved the money? I'm grateful that she took dd but surely she should have been upfront about her intention of using vouchers....AIBU?

OP posts:

FreudiansSlipper · 03/09/2014 12:42

I can not see the issue here at all

I would be delighted for ds to be taken to an amusement

I have never had anything like that amount that on any store cards

NoodleOodle · 03/09/2014 12:42

The offer was to take your DC at a cost of 25, which you agreed to and she fulfilled. So, technically, it is fair. Doesn't sit comfortably with me, though not badly enough that I would say or do anything about it.

FreudiansSlipper · 03/09/2014 12:43

Amusement park ....

MissMillament · 03/09/2014 12:43

I think you are being a bit petty here. What would you have done if your friend hadn't offered to take your DD for the day? Presumably she saved you having to take a day's leave or use childcare? I certainly think of my Clubcard vouchers as being as valuable as cash, so if I chose to use them in that way I wouldn't expect anyone to feel hard done by. Presumably you have other things you can use your vouchers for.

Original poster

jammyjamjam · 03/09/2014 12:43

withmyfeetinthesink.......my dds entrance would have cost her 6 pounds in tesco clubcard points as they are worth x4 for days out vouchers. She then kept my 25 pounds, she did the same for the other 2 girls so effectively she has turned 18 pounds of clubcard points into 75 quid. If I didn't use Tesco clubcard then it wouldn't have mattered to me, but I do and she knows I do. It would have saved me 25 pounds if I had used my points

OP posts:

ikeaismylocal · 03/09/2014 12:44

Yabu your child got a day out worth 25 pounds, you got a free day of childcare so you could work, maybe using points was a last minute idea, maybe the mum thought it would be too much faff to be collecting vouchers from the other mums.

You sound a bit ungrateful, why don't you offer to take her child to the attraction, use your vouchers and get your money back if it bothers you so much?

Only1scoop · 03/09/2014 12:44

Surely you gave her more for drinks food etc or sent a packed lunch? She didn't supply that also did she?

morethanpotatoprints · 03/09/2014 12:44

I can't see the problem either and think it was kind of her to take the kids.
She must have spent a lot in Tesco to save all those points, so it wasn't free.
I also agree if there was a bonus well good for her its hard work looking after somebody else's children.

bakingaddict · 03/09/2014 12:45

She'd have to convert £20 worth of club-card points to turn into £75 worth of club-card days out vouchers. The club-card points were given anyway as a bonus for whatever she needed to purchase so really she has made the full £75 off you all in a sense. Where was it that they went to? If I was taking a group of kids to a theme park i'd try and get discount vouchers so as to reduce the cost for everyone.

There are lots of 2 4 1 rail vouchers and the ones off cereal boxes to use

jenny1969 · 03/09/2014 12:46

Cheeky cow! If the entrance was £25, thats only 6.25ish in Tesco vouchers. I easily get £20 of vouchers a quarter, just from normal shopping, so a nice tidy profit made from you! I would be livid. Clubcard vouchers are free!

There is very little of actual value can be bought with clubcard points, so she has seen a nice money making opportunity!

BravePotato · 03/09/2014 12:46

the word "ungrateful" springs to mind.

MissMillament · 03/09/2014 12:47

Doesn't it just!
No good deed goes unpunished!

sleepyjean69 · 03/09/2014 12:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GlaceDragonflies · 03/09/2014 12:48

Bowlersarm it wasn't free though was it? She could have used those points for something else?
I think it'd be reasonable if it cost X in clubcard points and the OP's friend asked for £X to cover the cost but not if the OP's friend asked for more than the club card vouchers cost.
I had a disagreement similar to this recently, we offered to take our DC plus a friend to a zoo where the friend gets in free because they have a blue peter badge. The friend didn't want the embarrassment of showing a BP badge in front of his friends and so the parent said he wouldn't be bringing it. I said that they would have to pay the admission fee in that case since they could have got in free - my own DCs have a BP badge so were going in free but apparently I was unreasonable in expecting them to pay and should have paid it myself. In the end we didn't take the friend since the whole point of choosing that zoo was that the children all went in free and the other parent knew this.

TheGirlFromIpanema · 03/09/2014 12:48

I wouldn't worry about this at all tbh.

I'd see it as a clever way of stretching her money and would still be grateful for the actual day out iyswim.

Not sure how I'd feel if the tickets were freebies/giveaways, maybe differently; but certainly at least ten million trillion pounds must've been spent first to get Tesco clubcard vouchers

Lweji · 03/09/2014 12:48

surely she could have told us that this place took in Tesco vouchers

Or you could have checked it yourself?

I don't see why she was obliged to tell you about using vouchers there.

Only1scoop · 03/09/2014 12:48

Clubcard vouchers aren't free. She has spent a small fortune shopping in Tesco to accrue them.

LadyLuck10 · 03/09/2014 12:49

It's a bit cringe to be squabbling over vouchers op. Let it go.

DownByTheRiverside · 03/09/2014 12:49

So, she had no icecream, no treats, you didn't pay for the petrol and she took a packed lunch?

Original poster

jammyjamjam · 03/09/2014 12:49

Not ungrateful and there's no way I'd have an argument with her about this....but it's a very grey area, I personally would have mentioned to the other mums that they could get the entrance ticket with Tescvo vouchers. It's really not right that she kept this quiet but then got vouchers for all 3 dcs she was taking and kept the cash. Very odd

OP posts:

jenny1969 · 03/09/2014 12:49

I am always taking friends children or young relatives to amusements with my clubcard vouchers. I would not dream of asking for money!!!

murphys · 03/09/2014 12:49

Maybe she used the cash she had on the day to buy drinks/lunch. Did you send extra money for food?

Lweji · 03/09/2014 12:51

But it's not like you are throwing away your vouchers, is it?
You are spending them anyway.

Next time your DD goes somewhere, check yourself if you can send your vouchers.
It is not other people's responsibility where you spend them.

BolshierAyraStark · 03/09/2014 12:51

Whilst I appreciate you feel put out by this as she has made something out of it I do think YABU, she did you a favour.

senua · 03/09/2014 12:51

You knew where they were going
You knew that it is possible to pay by clubcard points
You have clubcard points

... so why didn't you sort it yourself beforehand?

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